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[quote=Anonymous]I think there are two problems here: first, you don't have a great AP (safe driving is an absolute necessity, and she also isn't doing her job if she's not cleaning up after your child) and second, you haven't done a good job of setting rules and expectations.

I think some of your cons are more than legitimate reasons to leave the program if it's just not for you. If you do decide to stay with the program, you need to do a better job of screening next time (prioritize driving!) and making sure when she gets here that she actually has the skills you screened for (driving!).

You also need to do a better job of setting rules, restrictions, and hours. For example, if you're not using all 45 hours -- then set a schedule that uses them. You should not be leaving work early to enable your AP to go out -- you should be setting the hours you need for work and then AP can work around those hours to make her evening and weekend plans. If you're already at your 45 hours, then unfortunately you need to go outside the program to have an occasional babysitter (or maybe a house cleaning service if you can afford it?) but the first step is to make sure you're scheduling the AP for her 45 hours. You need to make sure you set up rules and expectations about what the house should look like -- the AP shouldn't be doing housecleaning but she should absolutely be responsible for cleaning up (and teaching your dc to clean up) from playtime, kid's meal time, etc.

It's also not too late for this year to sit down and have a reset conversation about what you need her to do on her working hours such as the cleaning up kid messes. And if you're not using all her hours, then sit down, revise the schedule, and use them.

If taking those steps wouldn't solve your overall issues with having an AP, then it's time to look into alternate care arrangements, but if you think some of the issues are fixable, then try fixing them.[/quote]

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