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[quote=Anonymous]Nanny here who has worked with lots of WAHPs.  It's all about communication.  Here's what worked at my last job:

First, if kids were exhibiting bad behavior, DB did NOT come help.  That teaches them that tantrums=Daddy's attention.  Very counterproductive.  If I needed help I would send a quick text, but that was rare--really only in situations where kid had a medical issue or injury.

Second, DB stayed where the kids couldn't see him unless he had time to actually play with them.  We decided for us that the cutoff was 15 minutes.  If he had 15 minutes to get down on the floor and play, then it was worth the upset when he had to leave.  If he only had 5 minutes then he would walk by without making eye contact or speaking.  The kids would call his name, I'd say, "Daddy is working.  See his work face?" And he's go get a snack or whatever and go back to work.  Because there was a clear difference in his behavior between playtime and just-passing-through, they quickly learned the routine and wouldn't throw a fit everytime he had to go to the bathroom.

Finally, DB knew the routine.  He avoided coming out during lunch-bottle-nap because that was a really disruptive time, but he knew that certain times of day were playtime and he was welcome to join in.

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