Reply to Can a nanny be as good as mom?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Mom here.  A nanny can provide absolutely wonderful, loving, stable, fantastic care.  He/she can be a tremendous asset to a child's development, and a family's well-being.  A great nanny is a terrific supplement in a child's world.

No one replaces mom.  Ever.  No matter the circumstances, no matter how great or poor the parenting.  No one replaces a mother in a child's eyes and heart.[/quote]
Your response is a little over the top.
Some adopted children don't even remember their birth mothers. [/quote]

OP here. I kind of agree with the original pp. this is because I have a dear friend who became an overnight stepmom to 4 kids when the state revoked the mom's custody for some kind of emotional abuse.  Her visitation is now 1x per month, supervised, no visitation, and phone calls once per week. The mom never calls and never does visitation. She sporadically sends birthday and Christmas gifts. Once she sent the oldest daughter, now a teen, $5, saying it was all she could afford. My friend has done everything to stabilize the lives of these kids. Every birthday is celebrated with fanfare. Every holiday is made special. Every weekend there is a kid-oriented activity.  This past Christmas she bought them a trip to Disney. Privately she lamented to me that they made more of a fuss over the gifts their mom sent them- sweatshirts from Walmart with sports teams they don't even watch/like. Those kids will always love their mom, no matter how lousy a mom she is. [/quote]

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