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[quote=Anonymous]I think a great AP is a natural with kids, has a good sense of judgment so can reasonably navigate the tricky situations that arise when you're not around, cares about your approach to parenting and can respect basic parameters but also has a style of her own that works so she doesn't need step by step instructions for every scenario, and is proactive with coming up with things to do with the kids.

A great AP also needs decent room mate habits - picks up after herself without reminders, pitches in with family meals and activities in some small way (ie - sets the table, or puts away leftovers), and is courteous in  her comings & goings. For us, we also need a good driver and can't make do without one.

In my experience, age and work experience doesn't determine these things so much as personality. In our first AP search, I was most nervous about the room mate dynamic of the whole thing, so we really screened for a personality match - some one I thought I'd enjoy seeing at my dinner table every night for a year, which was a daunting thought in the beginning. Now that we're more experienced and I was less nervous about that piece of it, we screened more for childcare qualifications and yes, we have some one who looks more impressive on paper and is older, but she's not bonding with us as a family and I can see that we'll just never be as close to her as we were to our first. She's good with the kids, so it's fine, but it doesn't  feel as good to host in this situation - it's more a matter of mutual convenience this time around, rather than like having a dear niece stay with us. [/quote]

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