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[quote=Anonymous]I have had this problem as a nanny, here's how we resolved it.

MB, DB, and I got the kids together for a family meeting. MB told the kids that she had noticed them throwing tantrums when they weren't getting their way about calling me, seeing me, getting my cuddles, etc. MB said that throwing tantrums for any reason was unacceptable, and I verbally confirmed to the children that I disapproved of their difficult behavior. MB, DB, and I had talked privately before to see what we wanted to do so we could present a united front to the kids. We agreed that I would tell them that I was not going to be available after I left the house, and if the kids had anything they wanted to say to me or do with me they were to remember it in their heads until tomorrow, write it down, or (in the case of the youngest kid) ask a parent to write it down for them. That way they felt listened to but they weren't on the phone at all hours. It was important to me that I be the one to tell them that I would not be available to them, even though I loved them, because I didn't want MB and DB to be the bad guys in the situation. If the kids were going to get upset they could be upset with me about this. We ended the conversation by saying once more that the tantrums had to stop, no exceptions, laid out the consequences for a tantrum, and then gave them lots of hugs and cuddles and told them that we all love them VERY MUCH! Which is entirely true.

Take whatever you will from my experience. All three of you love the kids, and all three of you want life to be easy for them and for you. Good luck!
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