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[quote=Anonymous]You reference various goals you have for the girl, but my overall question is whether the parents share those goals with you? You're trying to wean her off the foods she normally eats and wean her from needing comfort when hungry & tired - are the parents on board with that? If not, you need to stop. Feed the kid what the parents want her to be fed. When she's tired & hungry, don't try to reason with her, give her a hug, a snack, and then put her to bed.

If you all are on the same page, then realize that weaning the girl off her normal snacks is going to be a process and yes, you do need to be careful not to let the girl be reminded that those are in the house when you're feeding her something else. Also, eating healthily shouldn't feel like a punishment - make sure that what you're offering tastes good. Steamed broccoli tastes a lot better with a squeeze of lemon & dash of salt. No sugar added, plain yogurt tastes good when part of a fresh smoothie - make  them a fresh blueberry & strawberry smoothie.

But expecting a 13 month old to self-soothe in the middle of a hunger tantrum is expecting too much, IMO. Pick the girl up. Calm her down. Feed her. She has basic physical needs that need to be met before you can start moralizing her behavior at this age. Set her up for success. What you describe set her up for failure - of course she was upset. [/quote]

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