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[quote=Anonymous]Well I'm sure I'll be flamed for this, but...

OP, how long do you plan to keep her? I think there is a lot of damage in children hearing themselves described that way as they get old enough to understand. Heck, I'm so fussy about how I talk in front of kids I jump through linguistic hoops to avoid using the word "no." I use positive framing, redirection, and praise effort rather than final product, etc - it sounds like this is the perspective you're coming from? (I know it's what I would want for my own kids.) If so, I think you need to find a nanny who speaks English as a native language (and probably one who has either a lot of nannying experience or has worked as an educator - you've been through tons of training on how to speak to kids if you're a trained teacher) or let this issue go.

I think if you speak to your nanny about this she will be confused, hurt, and won't really understand how to shift her words. You could say something about not wanting to label kids - so, Dylan was feeling lazy today rather than Dylan is lazy or Mary needed a lot of extra attention today rather than Mary is spoiled - and that would probably deal with the current issue, but I don't think she'll align with your bigger-picture and long-term preferences 100%. You have to decide if/when it becomes a deal breaker.[/quote]

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