Reply to What to do about kid who hits/kicks me out of frustration?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]No, an au pair does not have to stay.  But someone who is going to call "abuse/violence" the first time a child hits/kicks her has no business in a child care role.  Granted, OP says this has happened several times.  But I think the real issue is -- what is the family's response?  OP sounds much more realistic than you.  I thought your response was ridiculous.[/quote]

Head-butting someone more than once is not violent behavior? Okay... then what is?

In my second (non-US) au pair experience I left a family early (gave six weeks notice though, I was far too nice actually) because the 8 year old slapped me in the face, twice.
Once because he lost a board game, second time because I asked him to please come out of my bedroom and especially get off my computer. When I knelt down to talk to him, he first punched me in the chest and then slapped me... and then lied to his mom, telling her I had hit him.
Did I leave because he hit me? Not really. While I really don't like to be slapped, I do understand that sometimes children, even 8 year olds, cannot communicate their feelings clearly, get frustrated and can only react physically. I left because the host parents didn't give a damn and "rewarded" him for his behavior. Oh, you hit the au pair? Here, have a new bike and let us take you to the movies tonight, buy you popcorn and tell you, you are the best child under the sun. If you don't want to support your child-care provider, I will not provide child-care for you.
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