Reply to Need help processing incident with nanny

Forum Index » General Discussion

Reply to "Need help processing incident with nanny"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I had a day like that (several, probably, but one stands out). I think my charges were 3, 8 and 11 then, or maybe all a year younger. It was summer vacation as well and the whole day was arguing, being 'bored', fighting over nothing, winding each other up, being completely disrespectful to me, slamming doors, etc. The culmination was when we were in the pool and the 8yo pushed his older sister in at an awkward angle and smashed her head into the edge (she was okay)... throughout all which the 3yo was fine, but they are demanding on the best of days and need attention and need company, so I absolutely see how your nanny would be driven crazy with trying to play nicely with the little one while the older ones were being bratty.

So I took mine home, told them to go to their rooms and not come out until they were going to speak to me and each other nicely. They were stewing an hour later when their parents came home so it really was a bad day. Long story short, the next morning I was met with a lovely note with apologies ('appologies', I still have it) and promises to treat each other and me nicely and suggestions on what we could do that day. We had a chat about intentionally upsetting others and how it makes me sad and cross when they shout at me, and how much less likely I am to do something they want to do if they don't do what I ask them to do.

They were really good for a long time after that no good very bad day. I know their parents spoke to them as well about hurting other people's feelings by their awful behaviour, and we also cracked down a bit on discipline. So in the long run it ended up being a good thing! But I know in the moment I was quite upset and wound up. It also takes a while to learn not to take things personally, so your nanny probably just needs an evening to regroup.

If I were you, next time she comes in, I would casually tell her you hope she was okay after your kids were so awful and that you had a long chat with them and they see the error of their ways and promise to do better (maybe have them apologise, if they're willing), then have a little sit down with her and the kids and talk about consequences of their actions in the future.

Now, I don't know if your kids are super rude and whiny all the time, I hope they're not - but it seems like you see that there was a problem and you're willing to address it, which makes you a great parent to work for (as opposed to the my special snowflake can do no wrong kind of parent). All kids have bad days, all nannies get overwhelmed sometimes (especially younger ones with not much experience), so learn from it and move on.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics