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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I posted this in parenting, but thought it might be better here.
I have an almost 2 year old and almost 5 year old kids and work very part-time 2 days per week.  Lately when I come home the nanny has told me that the kids weren't well behaved and were fighting over toys (snatch & grab) or fussing with one another.  I have apologized and talk to my older child about behavior and at times send older child to bed early if I get a bad report.  I am home with the kids often and know that it can be irritating if they are crying over wanting the same toys, or if my older one is fussy and tired from preschool, but I am wondering what my response should be to nanny and to kids.[/quote]

Our nanny tells me if DC (2.5) does something really bad and sometimes he and I will talk about it, but mostly the report is that he was good or  naughty/fussy/not listening whatever and it's just info about the day.  I just say okay and thanks.  She hands out consequences at the time when needed so there is not really more for me to do when I get home (unless the consequence is ongoing and we will continue to enforce it).  I tell her how he was the evening before when she arrives in the morning too but it's more of an FYI than anything.   Once in a while she raises some ongoing behavior issue and I either tell her how I want her to handle it or we brainstorm together a consistent response to it.

It's hard to tell from your post but from what you say, it sounds like the nanny's standards for good behavior from kids that age are a little high.  Siblings squabble over toys.  Should they be polite and not grab?  Of course.  But she can remind them of that in the moment and should be defusing the situation then and there - not sure what you need to do after the fact ...[/quote]

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