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[quote=Anonymous]I'm 9:18 with the au pairs.  OP, if you already have a great nanny, I'm not sure I understand what the issue is.  Give her a schedule - for those hours, she is in charge of the older two, period.  Make it clear to the older two in words and in actions that nanny is in charge for those hours.  Have them be out of the house going to school, classes, the playground, playdates, just like they would if you weren't home.

When they are home, don't sit on the couch in their playroom nursing and letting them climb all over you while the nanny sits there.  Be upstairs in your room or another quiet space or get out of the house yourself.

If you really want to be with your older kids when you're not tied to the baby, then you're going to have to be even more clear.  So say you've nursed the baby and put it down for a nap.  You go downstairs and you want to spend time with the older kids - excuse the nanny for an hour for a break.  Then after the hour, get her back and disappear again.  Just make it very clear to everyone exactly what is going to happen.

But if you're only using her part-time anyway, you're going to get tons of time with all three kids during all the hours you have remaining without her.  It would be so much less confusing to have her be in charge of the older kids and you be in charge of the baby, and that's that.[/quote]

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