Reply to How did you start fresh after a bad experience?

Forum Index » Employer Issues

Reply to "How did you start fresh after a bad experience?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Try to take a step back and think about what you learned from your previous experience, and make your expectations clear with your new nanny. Sounds like you want someone engaged, constant phone use bugs you, and you appreciate kid centered outings and play dates with kids of a similar age. Make this clear to your new nanny, but don't punish her for your old nanny's mistakes (ie. a no outings/friends/phone rule). Also it sounds like you let some thing slide that bothered you, until you finally just couldn't take it. Don't do that this time. Say something the first time you see it, politely but firmly and nip issues in the bud. It really bugs me as a nanny to have a parent say something to me after months of it happening and they seem overly peeved about it. (One mom really didn't like the way I was folding the laundry and one day after nearly a year of doing it this way she got really snippy with me about it. Not cool) [/quote]

(OP here).  Thanks for this - this is exactly what I was looking for.  I think I was pretty clear in the beginning about my expectations (limiting cell phone use with the kids and playdates with similar aged kids was in our contract and training right from the beginning).  I think you caught what happened though - she was great for the first few months and then one by one started slipping in little things that went against what I had told her I expected and rather than say something, I just let it slide.  That wasn't fair and I will not do that again.

I was clear about 6 months ago about the phone use actually and I think that's what precipitated our decline and ultimate end.  My kid had told me that the nanny always ignored her because she was on her phone and I was like "ohhh?"  This from a three-year-old.  "Nanny never wants to play with me because she says she has to look at something on her phone."  I brought it up with the nanny and she said she is never on the phone when she is with the kids, not even for a second.  I'm Facebook friends with her, so unfortunately I saw her posting all the time even after we talked.  She's also glued to it whenever I see her, obsessively looking at it.  Yes, she's younger (24).

So even when I did bring something up, it still didn't change, and that's what did us in in the end.  But the taking my kid to meet her nanny friends thing was something I wasn't clear on after it happened - I let that slide and just slow-boiled on it.

Any tips on bringing up something you're not happy with politely and firmly?  I don't want her to get offended or defensive - I just want to have a conversation about what I expect, and I am more than willing to hear alternatives and find something that works for both of us.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics