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[quote=Anonymous]We have a great nanny for our 18month LO - she is wonderful.  She has a love of teaching, is punctual, reliable, responsible, and she is so responsive, patient, fun, and kind with our daughter.  She has been with us for almost a year now. LO loves spending time with her and has so much fun with her.

I work from home, with my office upstairs - most days I just see her in the morning when she comes in, at lunch time, and in the afternoon when she leaves.  So far it's been really great.  The one downside is that our general care giving styles are not a perfect match, and because there are days that I am doing things around the house, I get to see the differences more so than I might if I were working out of the home.

She is super super attentive and responsive to LO.  Sounds great, right?  It speaks to how she is as a whole person -  she has a big heart.  However my main philosophy in life is everything in moderation.  I generally accept this difference in our styles, because I do believe it's good for our LO to be exposed to different care giving styles.  And frankly, most people would probably LOVE to have a nanny as attentive and responsive as she is.

HOWEVER, I think at 18 months, our LO does need some time to herself.  Throughout the day, LO doesn't have 1 second of time to herself during the day while she is with the nanny.  I've talked to her in the recent past about giving LO some independent playtime, but she hasn't followed through with it yet.  Our nanny won't even go to the bathroom, tidy up, or do anything else other than play with LO during the times she is awake.

Even during meal times, I have had to tell her to stop spoon feeding her meals and let LO self-feed.  She rarely spoon feeds her anymore, but she still coaches her through every bite, giving praise.

I'm hesitant to bring it up again, because otherwise she's doing great.  Am I being crazy for even wanting to tell my nanny to stop being so attentive?  I admit it does sound a bit crazy.  Well I wouldn't use those words obviously.  But I'm concerned as to whether too much hovering will affect LO's self confidence and independence as she gets older.  And I am debating whether I should really try to enforce some independent play time with her.

Also at 18 months, our LO seems advanced in most areas, but seems to be lagging in language.  She says rough approximations of about 10 or so words, but still does not say things like "mom", "hi" or "bye."  Developmentally I'm not really concerned yet because her receptive language seems to be advanced, but I do wonder if being over-attentive and responsive to her has slowed her motivation to learn to talk.

Thoughts?
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