Reply to MB cancelling scheduled days - advice please

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I hear what you are saying about confrontation, but I think you and Mb need to have a frank and candid conversation.  I say that because it sounds like the job, however tricky the hours are, fills a spot in your schedule and in Mb's schedule, and so if you work together it seems you both would fit.  I'll start by saying I am a Mb, and when I first read this, I thought your Mb sounded awful - a complete flake and incredibly insensitive.  Then I thought, "what about this situation would make her think she could treat her sitter that way?".  And I think it's not that she's a terrible person (let us hope).  I think she must believe it's not a big deal.  It may be that the switching with a friend and going back and forth between you and a friend or a cousin has left Mb thinking her erratic schedule and frequent changes aren't a problem for you because of the backups, even as you try to cover it alone and it's giving you hell.  So, I think you have to talk.  I would suggest starting that conversation not from a place of "you're insensitive and my time is valuable" because she's going to be defensive even if that is true (and as I said, maybe it isn't - she may legit think her schedule is not a big deal for you).  Just say that clearly the recent schedule problem shows that both of you need to be on the same page.  And tell her that you orignally envisioned back up coverage, but that isn't quite how it's working, and so you want to keep working with her, but you need a little more certainty while responding to her needs as well.  You likely won't get guaranteed hours, but maybe suggest that you both meet Monday at X time each week to go over her coverage needs.  Tell her that from now on, you will agree to keep those days for her, so if she cancels, you'll need to be paid X amount for the late cancellation unless you manage to find another job.  Make it worth your while, but not prohibitively expensive.  She'll then think twice about cancelling.  And tell her that in exchange for this, she gets someone no matter what, and right of first refusal - it's her time unless she tells you at the Monday meeting she doesn't need you, but if she says she does and cancels, she ought to be willing to cover your loss in some meaningful way.  Then, you don't have to double-book just in case, and when cancellations affect her bottom line as well, she will do it with greater deliberation.  Of course, if her job is such that she just can't plan, then she may need greater flexibility, but given that finding essentially an on call sitter any given night is neither easy nor ideal, she should be willing to pay for a modified version of that even if it results in unavoidable cancellation fees.  I would, and my job is as crazy as your Mb's job sounds.[/quote]

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