Reply to S/O - How do you deal with a "difficult" baby in a nanny share?

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Reply to "S/O - How do you deal with a "difficult" baby in a nanny share?"

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[quote=Anonymous]PP, you must never have dealt with a difficult baby.  Truly difficult.  Beyond the norm.  Crying is one thing.  Screaming is a completely different thing.  I nannied for a baby that age who would scream for seemingly absolutely NO reason.  Screaming screaming screaming.  It was just his personality.  I followed many of the tips given above because otherwise there just wasn't any way to deal with him.  He has siblings so his parents certainly couldn't deal with that kind of behavior either.  No sleep schedule, wanting to be held all the time, screaming at the slightest delay or upset despite having all basic needs met.  Screaming at diaper changes, screaming when put in the stroller.  It wasn't a nanny share so I could spend more time than OP will have purposely pausing a moment and not directly responding to the screaming.  Things got a lot better with those strategies and also with age.  Some babies are just not calm and chilled and that's the way they are, but reacting to their screaming like it's the crisis it sounds like (rather than just normal baby needs which is what it actually is) is just going to reinforce the negative behavior.  A baby does NOT need to scream bloody murder while you're making a bottle (I'm talking an 8/9/10/11-month old, not a newborn).  Obviously you still make the bottle, but I was literally panicking and rushing until I realized that that was just reinforcing the behavior.  Same thing with waking up from a nap.  Playing with toys in the crib for a few minutes is developmentally good and sensible for both nanny and baby.  When a baby always wakes up screaming you can pretty quickly determine that there's nothing actually wrong, that's just what they are teaching themselves to do.  In the end I had a baby who could play with toys, babble away, and wait 5-10 minutes while I finished up chores.  Crying and screaming are just 2 totally different things at that age.  Crying is communication that you respond to appropriately.  Screaming is not necessary and needs to be curbed (gently of course, but curbed).[/quote]

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