Need a Nanny and I'm overwhelmed - advice please?
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Anonymous
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There is a 7 month gap from when my maternity leave ends and when our daycare center has an open infant spot. Jan-July 2016.
I estimate I'll need childcare Monday-Thursdays for about 10 hours a day, minus federal holidays. I really don't know where to start. Reading these forums, it sounds like a nanny will be a whole new experience and new complications. It's a lot to take in. I have a few dozen questions, and would love to hear from people who BTDT. I'll start with just a few to show you how clueless I am. 1. Is a nanny share better for my situation? Or is it just a hassle dealing with another family? 2. What do I do about my dog? He's a 70lb pain in the ass. 3. How do I get a background check done, how much does it cost, how long does it take? 4. Does the nanny hand me a boilerplate contract or do I need to provide it? 5. Do I reimburse any mileage? where would the nanny go with a 3 month - 9 month old? being alone for 10 hours a day with an infant seems cruel 6. what does a nanny do during naptimes? I have a housecleaning service, so I'm good there. 7. Is 7am too early to start? 8. Is this even an attractive job for an experienced nanny? What kind of applicants can I expect? |
Anonymous
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1. unless you can find another family only wanting 7 months, it sounds like you are better off finding a nanny for yourself
2. if he's really that bad, you need to crate him or block him off in a certain part of the house. I'm a dog lover and have a 70lb dog myself, but there's no way I would agree to working with a family that has a dog that big and I can't control 3. sorry, I'm a nanny I don't know that info 4. you can easily find a contract online (that's how my family did it) 5. if you are in a good area, there's no need for her to drive. I survived for two years without driving the twins I work for anywhere but I was also able to walk to multiple parks, a barnes and noble, a starbucks, and a handful of other kid-friendly places. we met plenty of children when we were out so there was no need for a class 6. I don't have any duties when my charges go down for a nap. 10 hours is a long day so it could just be downtime for your nanny if you are okay with that. other families ask for toy organization, child laundry, and cleaning the child's room/closet but I don't see how necessary that would be for you with a child so young 7. nope! I start at 7:10 8. it depends on your rate. I don't think you necessarily need to pay higher due to the fact that it is a limited time position. it might help some nannies that only need something that long and it will give them a definitive end time so they can look for new jobs. I would be careful if they go on an interview in month 5 and all of a sudden quit because they found something longer term. Unfortunately, you can't really control that as you need 7 months, no more. |
Anonymous
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I agree with 17:37 mostly; the dog needs to be out of the way (crated or at doggy daycare or something), and a temporary nanny share would be very difficult. 7am is not too early at all. Just require her to do very basic clean up and the dishes and let her be for nap time.
The one thing I would recommend is, to avoid the "what if the nanny finds a better paying permanent position a few months into the job" scenario, is to tell the nanny up front that you will be offering a bonus if she stays through the end of the contract period. Since it is for such a long stretch of time, said bonus will need to be pretty good; I'd say no less than one full weeks pay. It might sound like a lot but this nanny will really be helping you out for this time frame, and you can consider it her "early Christmas bonus" or something (since it sounds like she won't be with you for Xmas anyway). Also, you should give her guaranteed hours (yes, you pay her for holidays that fall on her regular work days when you don't need her) PLUS an additional 3-4 days of PTO (which she can use for a sick day or personal day, or if she wants to take a long weekend trip, etc). |
nannydebsays
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Anonymous
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OP - thank you for the responses. Doggie daycare is $30 a day. We can't afford that long term. Crating the dog all day means I get a bigger nutcase full of energy to deal with when I get home. Maybe if the nanny could walk him in the afternoon? He walks well alongside the stroller.
If I'm reading this right, the only way to attract and keep a qualified nanny is to offer a huge severance bonus. I will try to offer something, but I'm not sure I can do the quantities suggested. I dunno, these might mean a nanny is not the right choice. Not sure what to do though. |
Anonymous
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OP I'm the first PP and absolutely not - do not make the dog the nanny's responsibility. you just said yourself that he is a nutcase and that is incredibly unfair to put on your nanny (unless you are paying her substantially extra). you are not talking about a little yipper dog, which would be annoying enough - you're talking about a dog that would require her FULL attention when out on a walk which is not what you are paying her to do. like I said, I have a 70lb dog too - I walk him for an hour every morning before I leave for work. sorry, that's the reality of a dog. walk him and either crate him or keep him confined to one or two rooms.
please, please do not ask your nanny to deal with a large and untrained dog. you will absolutely not keep her for 7 months if you are so cavalier about it |
Anonymous
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OP, if you ask your Nanny to be your dog walker, you may lose that nanny. I like dogs, but have no desire to be a dog nanny. What about an actual dog walker 2 times a day?
If you are sick and tired of your dog, who you or your spouse presumably wanted and adopted, a Nanny isn't all that likely to fall utterly in love with your pain in the ass nutcase. |
Anonymous
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Hey OP, I'm a new "MB" here in the process of hiring our first nanny. I find the process intimidating as well and can't answer all your questions, but here are a couple of thoughts and some moral support too. It looks like you got some good advice on most things (I can't speak to the dog, since we don't have one). On the 7 month time period, I think a retention bonus is a good idea, but I do think you will find someone who fits your bill in any event. A pregnant nanny, or one with a baby who might like to bring the baby along, or one new to the area and trying to learn her way around, or thinking of relocating soon, or just someone who would be happy to work and get another good reference on her resume. My neighbor has a very part time nanny, sometime like 3 days a week with pretty short hours, and found a taker for that who has been with them for a while now. There are people with all sorts of schedules and needs and someone out there will fit your bill. Good luck!
For background checks, someone gave me this link: https://www.enannysource.com/Nanny-Background-Check.aspx Haven't used it yet. |
Anonymous
As long as you do not add add'l chores, then I am pretty confident you can find a quality nanny. Make sure you pay a fair wage + give her plenty of autonomy in her duties. Happy Nanny = Happy Child + Happy Parents. Win win!! 
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Anonymous
Most nannies will not be willing to walk your dog (and therefore, pick up its poop), unless you are paying extra for that service. Dealing with a large "nutcase" dog and an infant all day is not ideal and any good nanny will recognize this and likely run for the hills ASAP. I agree that not being able to afford doggie daycare OR a severance bonus is a red flag to me that maybe you are not financially able to have a nanny, even for just the seven months. Have you considered a home daycare type of solution? It will be cheaper than a nanny and then they won't have to deal with your giant pain of a dog (and you can just pay a dog walker whatever it is $10 or $20 to stop by in the early afternoon to walk the dog). |
Anonymous
| Out nanny of 5 years walks our dog each day. Often times for a good 45min. |
Anonymous
That's nice for you. Did you see the part where OP is unsure she can afford to pay Nanny anything extra for this inconvenience. Also, is your dog a "pain in the ass?" Because OP admits that hers is. A well-paid nanny walking a well-behaved dog is not comparable to what OP is describing. |
Anonymous
| I hate dogs so that would be a big nonstarter for me. |
Anonymous
OP. He's a pain in the ass in the house, but strangely pleasant on walks. Doesn't pull and loves walking next to the stroller. I could crate him but not for 10 hours. He'd need a 45 min walk around 2 or 3pm. It sounds like dog walking is above and beyond what nannies are asked to do though. Is that correct? So I'm looking at the cost of the nanny, cost of a dog walker/daycare, cost of a severance bonus, plus daily mileage/gas, and food. I'll have to take another look at the budget. I'd rather know now if I can afford this, before I waste other people's time interviewing. It's hard to explain, but I was raised in a working class family and would feel like a betrayal if I offered less than what the person was worth or nickel and dimed them for mileage and gas. I'd prefer not to feel like an asshat for 7 months. Are there any other expenses that I haven't considered? I appreciate the responses so far. They have been helpful in my ignorance. |
Anonymous
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OP, for the bonus, just adjust the amount you offer to begin with (if you could have afforded $17 per hour, offer $16 and use the excess to cover the bonus. You only need to pay for mileage if you live in a non-walkable neighborhood. If there at least A library or a Starbucks or anything like that within walking distance from your house, then that is sufficient for nanny to have the opportunity to get out a little bit during the day.
As for the dog, I don't think you need to crate him during the day, but you do need to have him in a separate area of the house from where nanny and baby will be. Could you put him on one floor of the house, or block him off so that he is in the master bedroom, etc.? That gives him a little more space than a crate, but keeps him from constantly being underfoot. As two walks, that really depends on how much a dog walking service would cost. It may be that you could offer the nanny a comparable amount in addition to her regular pay for the hassle of walking him daily. But keep in mind that it may not be in baby's best interest Or in the dog's best interest for the nanny to have to make a judgment call on foul weather days about whether to bring baby and dog out into cold weather or whether to keep baby and dog inside, resulting in a grumpy dog. If you can afford to have a separate dog walker, I think that that would probably be better for everyone involved. |