Fired nanny for cause. Do I owe her new employer any information? Live and let live? Get sued? RSS feed

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[Post New]06/17/2015 11:43
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Anonymous
Sounds like you have already gave the reference that babies were not your nannie's strong area and they still decided to hire her so IMO you did your part. If you were to go back now and tell the new employer what you are indicating on this board it would sound a bit catty and would ask why did you leave this out. You should at this point stay out of it.
[Post New]06/17/2015 12:00
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Anonymous
Ok! I appreciate the leveled feedback I received. Thank you for that. I'll follow my preferred course of action which is to do/say nothing to the new employer.
[Post New]06/17/2015 12:07
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Ok! I appreciate the leveled feedback I received. Thank you for that. I'll follow my preferred course of action which is to do/say nothing to the new employer.


Or, you could follow your conscience and call new employers to share an updated reference. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I suspected someone of harming or having the potential to harm a baby, then passed that person off to another family to care for their infant. Scary.
[Post New]06/17/2015 12:19
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Ok! I appreciate the leveled feedback I received. Thank you for that. I'll follow my preferred course of action which is to do/say nothing to the new employer.


Or, you could follow your conscience and call new employers to share an updated reference. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I suspected someone of harming or having the potential to harm a baby, then passed that person off to another family to care for their infant. Scary.

I've talked with cps about certain parents. Based on what I witnessed, CPS asked me if I'd like to file a formal report. I didn't do it. I pray for that child every day. Do you think maybe I should have? It wasn't exactly a life or death thing. But clearly neglectful... the kind of thing CPS gets involved with.
[Post New]06/17/2015 12:27
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Ok! I appreciate the leveled feedback I received. Thank you for that. I'll follow my preferred course of action which is to do/say nothing to the new employer.


Or, you could follow your conscience and call new employers to share an updated reference. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I suspected someone of harming or having the potential to harm a baby, then passed that person off to another family to care for their infant. Scary.


There is a reason people are believed innocent until proven guilty in this country. Your "suspicions" are flimsy and this woman doesn't deserve to have you meddle in her life. I find it hard to believe, and OP should as well, that your nanny suddenly hurts children and even if that were true, why would she do it somewhere so visible? It was probably an accident. Maybe babies are her strong suit, but you already told the new employer as much. You have done your job.
[Post New]06/17/2015 12:56
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Ok! I appreciate the leveled feedback I received. Thank you for that. I'll follow my preferred course of action which is to do/say nothing to the new employer.


Or, you could follow your conscience and call new employers to share an updated reference. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I suspected someone of harming or having the potential to harm a baby, then passed that person off to another family to care for their infant. Scary.


There is a reason people are believed innocent until proven guilty in this country. Your "suspicions" are flimsy and this woman doesn't deserve to have you meddle in her life. I find it hard to believe, and OP should as well, that your nanny suddenly hurts children and even if that were true, why would she do it somewhere so visible? It was probably an accident. Maybe babies are her strong suit, but you already told the new employer as much. You have done your job.


theres a reason so many people die and criminals go free in this country, and coincidentally it's also the innocent until proven guilty bull crap.
[Post New]06/17/2015 13:11
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Ok! I appreciate the leveled feedback I received. Thank you for that. I'll follow my preferred course of action which is to do/say nothing to the new employer.


Or, you could follow your conscience and call new employers to share an updated reference. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I suspected someone of harming or having the potential to harm a baby, then passed that person off to another family to care for their infant. Scary.

I've talked with cps about certain parents. Based on what I witnessed, CPS asked me if I'd like to file a formal report. I didn't do it. I pray for that child every day. Do you think maybe I should have? It wasn't exactly a life or death thing. But clearly neglectful... the kind of thing CPS gets involved with.


Regardless of if you file a report or not, when you speak to CPS or DCFS or any of those agencies, if they hear something that would warrant a report they have to follow up.

On the same note, you may be a mandated reporter in your state if you are a nanny or other primary child care provider who is not immediate family. Find this out and don't shirk your responsibilities in the future.

If nannies want to be taken seriously as professional individuals, they need to start adhering to professional standards, no matter how uncomfortable it may make them.
[Post New]06/17/2015 13:33
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Ok! I appreciate the leveled feedback I received. Thank you for that. I'll follow my preferred course of action which is to do/say nothing to the new employer.


Or, you could follow your conscience and call new employers to share an updated reference. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I suspected someone of harming or having the potential to harm a baby, then passed that person off to another family to care for their infant. Scary.

I've talked with cps about certain parents. Based on what I witnessed, CPS asked me if I'd like to file a formal report. I didn't do it. I pray for that child every day. Do you think maybe I should have? It wasn't exactly a life or death thing. But clearly neglectful... the kind of thing CPS gets involved with.


Regardless of if you file a report or not, when you speak to CPS or DCFS or any of those agencies, if they hear something that would warrant a report they have to follow up.

On the same note, you may be a mandated reporter in your state if you are a nanny or other primary child care provider who is not immediate family. Find this out and don't shirk your responsibilities in the future.

If nannies want to be taken seriously as professional individuals, they need to start adhering to professional standards, no matter how uncomfortable it may make them.

1. You don't know what you're talking about, because they can't investigate until I provide pertinent details, hence the report.

2. Do you take public school principals and teachers seriously? It'd be amazing when they all report known sexual abuse of students by their colleagues.
[Post New]06/17/2015 13:45
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Anonymous
OP, what injury did your infant sustain to her face at the hands of the nanny? You're being vague and it's hard to make the call of what you should do because of this.
[Post New]06/17/2015 14:09
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Anonymous
I don't think you have to worry too much about the new family suing you in a court of law. Slim chance of that.

I would just stay out of it now, she is gone and you will be moving on. Literally and figuratively.

If she did something serious, of course, I would have a differing opinion on this.

However now it would be up to you to provide strong evidence of abuse and that may be difficult. The burden of proof stands on you.

Sorry this is happening. Good luck on your move.
[Post New]06/17/2015 14:58
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Ok! I appreciate the leveled feedback I received. Thank you for that. I'll follow my preferred course of action which is to do/say nothing to the new employer.


Or, you could follow your conscience and call new employers to share an updated reference. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I suspected someone of harming or having the potential to harm a baby, then passed that person off to another family to care for their infant. Scary.

I've talked with cps about certain parents. Based on what I witnessed, CPS asked me if I'd like to file a formal report. I didn't do it. I pray for that child every day. Do you think maybe I should have? It wasn't exactly a life or death thing. But clearly neglectful... the kind of thing CPS gets involved with.


Regardless of if you file a report or not, when you speak to CPS or DCFS or any of those agencies, if they hear something that would warrant a report they have to follow up.

On the same note, you may be a mandated reporter in your state if you are a nanny or other primary child care provider who is not immediate family. Find this out and don't shirk your responsibilities in the future.

If nannies want to be taken seriously as professional individuals, they need to start adhering to professional standards, no matter how uncomfortable it may make them.

1. You don't know what you're talking about, because they can't investigate until I provide pertinent details, hence the report.

2. Do you take public school principals and teachers seriously? It'd be amazing when they all report known sexual abuse of students by their colleagues.


Touched a nerve, did I? Perhaps you should have just done the right thing in the first place rather than coming here and trying to derail a thread with your guilt.
[Post New]06/17/2015 15:28
quote
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Ok! I appreciate the leveled feedback I received. Thank you for that. I'll follow my preferred course of action which is to do/say nothing to the new employer.


Or, you could follow your conscience and call new employers to share an updated reference. I don't think I'd be able to live with myself if I suspected someone of harming or having the potential to harm a baby, then passed that person off to another family to care for their infant. Scary.


There is a reason people are believed innocent until proven guilty in this country. Your "suspicions" are flimsy and this woman doesn't deserve to have you meddle in her life. I find it hard to believe, and OP should as well, that your nanny suddenly hurts children and even if that were true, why would she do it somewhere so visible? It was probably an accident. Maybe babies are her strong suit, but you already told the new employer as much. You have done your job.


theres a reason so many people die and criminals go free in this country, and coincidentally it's also the innocent until proven guilty bull crap.


Maybe you should move to a cou,try where you are guilty until proven innocent. You are pathetic.
[Post New]06/17/2015 15:38
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nannydebsays

Member Offline
OP, to best answer your question, I need to know what your former nanny said about the injury to your baby.

1) "I am sorry, I scratched baby badly today while dressing her. I washed the wound, and called the pediatrician to see if I could use antibiotic cream...blah de blah."

2) "I scratched the baby today. It looks worse than it is. Probably."

3) "The baby would not stop wiggling when I was dressing her, and I had to hold her down. I didn't really mean to scratch her, but if she can't be still she'll get hurt."

3? - Call the new employers.

2? - Be happy she is gone, and don't call.

1? - Consider that you might have overreacted, and don't call and screw your former nanny over.
[Post New]06/17/2015 16:05
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Anonymous
nannydeb: it was closer to #2. Thanks for your examples, they're helpful.
[Post New]06/17/2015 19:06
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Anonymous
I think a reference check is to get information exactly like this. However, you need to be careful to protect yourself from lawsuits as well as being fair to the new nanny. What did you exactly see when your child was hurt? If nothing, you cannot claim the nanny did it. Stick to facts and try to give the reference she deserves for the sake of these new children who have this nanny.
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