Forcing Nanny To Quit Other Job

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. We talked to be nanny and we said things more politely than the way I worded it. We told her we were concerned about quality of care and her burning out. The nanny said the family wants a night nurse for at least the first 6 months or until the baby is sleeping through the night. The family does require her to stay up but rest during certain times. She will be doing bottles and laundry when the baby sleeps. We are uncomfortable with it and DH wants to et her go. We offer a very good compensation package and we want quality care.

Obviously, your compensation is not very good or your nanny would not need a 2nd job.

Disagree. I actually think the nanny is taking advantage of having an easy regular gig to take on a second gig for even more money. OP's job, with the benefits she offers, means the nanny has a lot of free time, and probably feels like the job isn't that demanding. She would never do this if she was working more hours for the same money; she'd be too tired.

Op here. I know it's not an easy job but our baby sleeps 4-5 out of the 8 hours she is here. The only thing she needs to do is wash his bottles while he naps. We handle laundry and are very clean people. I know he will require less sleep as he gets older but she has 4-5 hours of downtime, which she uses to mainly watch TV or use her phone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You'll be on here complaining about your next nanny's secretive personal life. Ha. Now maybe that poster understands why her nanny doesn't want to chat about non work related things.

Op here. We screen better am put in a " no night job" clause. We are more than fine with her having another part-time job on her off days or the weekend, but not during the night. She told us it will be for at least 6 months and she will be required to stay away. We feel that will have a negative impact on her job performance. My child's safety and health is more important to is than pleasing a nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You'll be on here complaining about your next nanny's secretive personal life. Ha. Now maybe that poster understands why her nanny doesn't want to chat about non work related things.

Op here. We screen better am put in a " no night job" clause. We are more than fine with her having another part-time job on her off days or the weekend, but not during the night. She told us it will be for at least 6 months and she will be required to stay away. We feel that will have a negative impact on her job performance. My child's safety and health is more important to is than pleasing a nanny.

If this were true, you would stay home with your child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You'll be on here complaining about your next nanny's secretive personal life. Ha. Now maybe that poster understands why her nanny doesn't want to chat about non work related things.

Op here. We screen better am put in a " no night job" clause. We are more than fine with her having another part-time job on her off days or the weekend, but not during the night. She told us it will be for at least 6 months and she will be required to stay away. We feel that will have a negative impact on her job performance. My child's safety and health is more important to is than pleasing a nanny.

If this were true, you would stay home with your child.

Total logic fail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You'll be on here complaining about your next nanny's secretive personal life. Ha. Now maybe that poster understands why her nanny doesn't want to chat about non work related things.

Op here. We screen better am put in a " no night job" clause. We are more than fine with her having another part-time job on her off days or the weekend, but not during the night. She told us it will be for at least 6 months and she will be required to stay away. We feel that will have a negative impact on her job performance. My child's safety and health is more important to is than pleasing a nanny.

If this were true, you would stay home with your child.

Op here. The reason I work is because I care about the above. I work part-time, and yes that means I sacrifice time with my child, but I do for my child's future. I work to provide him with a good future by giving him basic necessities, a comfortable lifestyle, the opportunity to go to college, etc. Most importantly, I work to teach him that nothing good comes without hard work and sacrifice. I am willing to sacrifice a little time with him to provide him with a good future.

You sound like a very judgemental person and nanny. I was a nanny in my 20's and I always admired my bosses for their work ethic and sacrifice. The worked to provide their children with the best life. It's admirable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You'll be on here complaining about your next nanny's secretive personal life. Ha. Now maybe that poster understands why her nanny doesn't want to chat about non work related things.

Op here. We screen better am put in a " no night job" clause. We are more than fine with her having another part-time job on her off days or the weekend, but not during the night. She told us it will be for at least 6 months and she will be required to stay away. We feel that will have a negative impact on her job performance. My child's safety and health is more important to is than pleasing a nanny.

If this were true, you would stay home with your child.

Op here. The reason I work is because I care about the above. I work part-time, and yes that means I sacrifice time with my child, but I do for my child's future. I work to provide him with a good future by giving him basic necessities, a comfortable lifestyle, the opportunity to go to college, etc. Most importantly, I work to teach him that nothing good comes without hard work and sacrifice. I am willing to sacrifice a little time with him to provide him with a good future.

You sound like a very judgemental person and nanny. I was a nanny in my 20's and I always admired my bosses for their work ethic and sacrifice. The worked to provide their children with the best life. It's admirable.

You are as full of it as a Christmas goose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You'll be on here complaining about your next nanny's secretive personal life. Ha. Now maybe that poster understands why her nanny doesn't want to chat about non work related things.

Op here. We screen better am put in a " no night job" clause. We are more than fine with her having another part-time job on her off days or the weekend, but not during the night. She told us it will be for at least 6 months and she will be required to stay away. We feel that will have a negative impact on her job performance. My child's safety and health is more important to is than pleasing a nanny.

If this were true, you would stay home with your child.

Op here. The reason I work is because I care about the above. I work part-time, and yes that means I sacrifice time with my child, but I do for my child's future. I work to provide him with a good future by giving him basic necessities, a comfortable lifestyle, the opportunity to go to college, etc. Most importantly, I work to teach him that nothing good comes without hard work and sacrifice. I am willing to sacrifice a little time with him to provide him with a good future.

You sound like a very judgemental person and nanny. I was a nanny in my 20's and I always admired my bosses for their work ethic and sacrifice. The worked to provide their children with the best life. It's admirable.

You are as full of it as a Christmas goose.

Ignore the troll OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You'll be on here complaining about your next nanny's secretive personal life. Ha. Now maybe that poster understands why her nanny doesn't want to chat about non work related things.

Op here. We screen better am put in a " no night job" clause. We are more than fine with her having another part-time job on her off days or the weekend, but not during the night. She told us it will be for at least 6 months and she will be required to stay away. We feel that will have a negative impact on her job performance. My child's safety and health is more important to is than pleasing a nanny.

If this were true, you would stay home with your child.

Op here. The reason I work is because I care about the above. I work part-time, and yes that means I sacrifice time with my child, but I do for my child's future. I work to provide him with a good future by giving him basic necessities, a comfortable lifestyle, the opportunity to go to college, etc. Most importantly, I work to teach him that nothing good comes without hard work and sacrifice. I am willing to sacrifice a little time with him to provide him with a good future.

You sound like a very judgemental person and nanny. I was a nanny in my 20's and I always admired my bosses for their work ethic and sacrifice. The worked to provide their children with the best life. It's admirable.

"Revolving door nannies" is NEGLECTFUL parenting.

[Anonymous]

I would get a new nanny if I was in your situation. You did the right thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. We talked to be nanny and we said things more politely than the way I worded it. We told her we were concerned about quality of care and her burning out. The nanny said the family wants a night nurse for at least the first 6 months or until the baby is sleeping through the night. The family does require her to stay up but rest during certain times. She will be doing bottles and laundry when the baby sleeps. We are uncomfortable with it and DH wants to et her go. We offer a very good compensation package and we want quality care.

Obviously, your compensation is not very good or your nanny would not need a 2nd job.

Disagree. I actually think the nanny is taking advantage of having an easy regular gig to take on a second gig for even more money. OP's job, with the benefits she offers, means the nanny has a lot of free time, and probably feels like the job isn't that demanding. She would never do this if she was working more hours for the same money; she'd be too tired.

Op here. I know it's not an easy job but our baby sleeps 4-5 out of the 8 hours she is here. The only thing she needs to do is wash his bottles while he naps. We handle laundry and are very clean people. I know he will require less sleep as he gets older but she has 4-5 hours of downtime, which she uses to mainly watch TV or use her phone.

I said your gig IS an easy job, and that's why she's moonlighting.
I think you may be going overboard on the perks for this job. I know you're doing it to make someone happy, but it also sends a message that she doesn't need to work hard to impress you -- you're just thrilled she exists. I don't know how to put this, exactly, but when people are overcompensated for an easy job before they've done anything to earn it, the message is that the bosses don't understand the value of their money or the point of the job. I would suggest that when you hire this next time, you hold back a few of those perks for a one-month or 6-month review time. Let her prove that she take the job seriously first.

I'm going to get slammed by nannies for this, but outside of the nanny world, I've seen this phenomenon too: when you're overcompesated, you can get an inflated sense of your own worth just for existing, vs. a sense that you are compensated well for doing a great job. This then leads you to think that you really shouldn't have to do much at all to get that money, so why put in the effort? You might as well phone it in at the well-paying gig, and put your efforts elsewhere (some people might go to school, pursue a hobby, etc.. Your nanny took another job).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. We talked to be nanny and we said things more politely than the way I worded it. We told her we were concerned about quality of care and her burning out. The nanny said the family wants a night nurse for at least the first 6 months or until the baby is sleeping through the night. The family does require her to stay up but rest during certain times. She will be doing bottles and laundry when the baby sleeps. We are uncomfortable with it and DH wants to et her go. We offer a very good compensation package and we want quality care.

Obviously, your compensation is not very good or your nanny would not need a 2nd job.

Disagree. I actually think the nanny is taking advantage of having an easy regular gig to take on a second gig for even more money. OP's job, with the benefits she offers, means the nanny has a lot of free time, and probably feels like the job isn't that demanding. She would never do this if she was working more hours for the same money; she'd be too tired.

Op here. I know it's not an easy job but our baby sleeps 4-5 out of the 8 hours she is here. The only thing she needs to do is wash his bottles while he naps. We handle laundry and are very clean people. I know he will require less sleep as he gets older but she has 4-5 hours of downtime, which she uses to mainly watch TV or use her phone.

I said your gig IS an easy job, and that's why she's moonlighting.
I think you may be going overboard on the perks for this job. I know you're doing it to make someone happy, but it also sends a message that she doesn't need to work hard to impress you -- you're just thrilled she exists. I don't know how to put this, exactly, but when people are overcompensated for an easy job before they've done anything to earn it, the message is that the bosses don't understand the value of their money or the point of the job. I would suggest that when you hire this next time, you hold back a few of those perks for a one-month or 6-month review time. Let her prove that she take the job seriously first.

I'm going to get slammed by nannies for this, but outside of the nanny world, I've seen this phenomenon too: when you're overcompesated, you can get an inflated sense of your own worth just for existing, vs. a sense that you are compensated well for doing a great job. This then leads you to think that you really shouldn't have to do much at all to get that money, so why put in the effort? You might as well phone it in at the well-paying gig, and put your efforts elsewhere (some people might go to school, pursue a hobby, etc.. Your nanny took another job).

OP here. We agree. We are knocking down our price to only hours work plus benefits like vacation, sick days, paid holidays, etc., but will be putting a clause in for health insurance and dental and possible commute time. We have security camera and our nanny was doing her job while the baby was up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. We talked to be nanny and we said things more politely than the way I worded it. We told her we were concerned about quality of care and her burning out. The nanny said the family wants a night nurse for at least the first 6 months or until the baby is sleeping through the night. The family does require her to stay up but rest during certain times. She will be doing bottles and laundry when the baby sleeps. We are uncomfortable with it and DH wants to et her go. We offer a very good compensation package and we want quality care.

Obviously, your compensation is not very good or your nanny would not need a 2nd job.

Disagree. I actually think the nanny is taking advantage of having an easy regular gig to take on a second gig for even more money. OP's job, with the benefits she offers, means the nanny has a lot of free time, and probably feels like the job isn't that demanding. She would never do this if she was working more hours for the same money; she'd be too tired.

Op here. I know it's not an easy job but our baby sleeps 4-5 out of the 8 hours she is here. The only thing she needs to do is wash his bottles while he naps. We handle laundry and are very clean people. I know he will require less sleep as he gets older but she has 4-5 hours of downtime, which she uses to mainly watch TV or use her phone.

I said your gig IS an easy job, and that's why she's moonlighting.
I think you may be going overboard on the perks for this job. I know you're doing it to make someone happy, but it also sends a message that she doesn't need to work hard to impress you -- you're just thrilled she exists. I don't know how to put this, exactly, but when people are overcompensated for an easy job before they've done anything to earn it, the message is that the bosses don't understand the value of their money or the point of the job. I would suggest that when you hire this next time, you hold back a few of those perks for a one-month or 6-month review time. Let her prove that she take the job seriously first.

I'm going to get slammed by nannies for this, but outside of the nanny world, I've seen this phenomenon too: when you're overcompesated, you can get an inflated sense of your own worth just for existing, vs. a sense that you are compensated well for doing a great job. This then leads you to think that you really shouldn't have to do much at all to get that money, so why put in the effort? You might as well phone it in at the well-paying gig, and put your efforts elsewhere (some people might go to school, pursue a hobby, etc.. Your nanny took another job).

OP here. We agree. We are knocking down our price to only hours work plus benefits like vacation, sick days, paid holidays, etc., but will be putting a clause in for health insurance and dental and possible commute time. We have security camera and our nanny was doing her job while the baby was up.

You fired your nanny for doing a job.
You did her a favor letting her go.
New parents are a trip!
- an MB

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. We talked to be nanny and we said things more politely than the way I worded it. We told her we were concerned about quality of care and her burning out. The nanny said the family wants a night nurse for at least the first 6 months or until the baby is sleeping through the night. The family does require her to stay up but rest during certain times. She will be doing bottles and laundry when the baby sleeps. We are uncomfortable with it and DH wants to et her go. We offer a very good compensation package and we want quality care.

Obviously, your compensation is not very good or your nanny would not need a 2nd job.

Disagree. I actually think the nanny is taking advantage of having an easy regular gig to take on a second gig for even more money. OP's job, with the benefits she offers, means the nanny has a lot of free time, and probably feels like the job isn't that demanding. She would never do this if she was working more hours for the same money; she'd be too tired.

Op here. I know it's not an easy job but our baby sleeps 4-5 out of the 8 hours she is here. The only thing she needs to do is wash his bottles while he naps. We handle laundry and are very clean people. I know he will require less sleep as he gets older but she has 4-5 hours of downtime, which she uses to mainly watch TV or use her phone.

I said your gig IS an easy job, and that's why she's moonlighting.
I think you may be going overboard on the perks for this job. I know you're doing it to make someone happy, but it also sends a message that she doesn't need to work hard to impress you -- you're just thrilled she exists. I don't know how to put this, exactly, but when people are overcompensated for an easy job before they've done anything to earn it, the message is that the bosses don't understand the value of their money or the point of the job. I would suggest that when you hire this next time, you hold back a few of those perks for a one-month or 6-month review time. Let her prove that she take the job seriously first.

I'm going to get slammed by nannies for this, but outside of the nanny world, I've seen this phenomenon too: when you're overcompesated, you can get an inflated sense of your own worth just for existing, vs. a sense that you are compensated well for doing a great job. This then leads you to think that you really shouldn't have to do much at all to get that money, so why put in the effort? You might as well phone it in at the well-paying gig, and put your efforts elsewhere (some people might go to school, pursue a hobby, etc.. Your nanny took another job).

OP here. We agree. We are knocking down our price to only hours work plus benefits like vacation, sick days, paid holidays, etc., but will be putting a clause in for health insurance and dental and possible commute time. We have security camera and our nanny was doing her job while the baby was up.

You fired your nanny for doing a job.
You did her a favor letting her go.
New parents are a trip!
- an MB

No. Op fired her because the nanny took a 6 month night nurse position where she is required to stay up. I agree and would fire her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. We talked to be nanny and we said things more politely than the way I worded it. We told her we were concerned about quality of care and her burning out. The nanny said the family wants a night nurse for at least the first 6 months or until the baby is sleeping through the night. The family does require her to stay up but rest during certain times. She will be doing bottles and laundry when the baby sleeps. We are uncomfortable with it and DH wants to et her go. We offer a very good compensation package and we want quality care.

Obviously, your compensation is not very good or your nanny would not need a 2nd job.

Disagree. I actually think the nanny is taking advantage of having an easy regular gig to take on a second gig for even more money. OP's job, with the benefits she offers, means the nanny has a lot of free time, and probably feels like the job isn't that demanding. She would never do this if she was working more hours for the same money; she'd be too tired.

Op here. I know it's not an easy job but our baby sleeps 4-5 out of the 8 hours she is here. The only thing she needs to do is wash his bottles while he naps. We handle laundry and are very clean people. I know he will require less sleep as he gets older but she has 4-5 hours of downtime, which she uses to mainly watch TV or use her phone.

I said your gig IS an easy job, and that's why she's moonlighting.
I think you may be going overboard on the perks for this job. I know you're doing it to make someone happy, but it also sends a message that she doesn't need to work hard to impress you -- you're just thrilled she exists. I don't know how to put this, exactly, but when people are overcompensated for an easy job before they've done anything to earn it, the message is that the bosses don't understand the value of their money or the point of the job. I would suggest that when you hire this next time, you hold back a few of those perks for a one-month or 6-month review time. Let her prove that she take the job seriously first.

I'm going to get slammed by nannies for this, but outside of the nanny world, I've seen this phenomenon too: when you're overcompesated, you can get an inflated sense of your own worth just for existing, vs. a sense that you are compensated well for doing a great job. This then leads you to think that you really shouldn't have to do much at all to get that money, so why put in the effort? You might as well phone it in at the well-paying gig, and put your efforts elsewhere (some people might go to school, pursue a hobby, etc.. Your nanny took another job).

OP here. We agree. We are knocking down our price to only hours work plus benefits like vacation, sick days, paid holidays, etc., but will be putting a clause in for health insurance and dental and possible commute time. We have security camera and our nanny was doing her job while the baby was up.

I wouldn't offer the benefits until after 60 days. You don't need to pay for commute or that high of a wage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know the title makes me sound horrible but I am bery annoyed with our nanny. She let it slip that she started working as a part-time night nurse. I know she needs income ( we are part-time) but her job means that she will be up for 24 hours to complete not hours and the night nurse job. I feel uncomfortable leaving my infant in her care if she has been up the night before she needs to be here. She will work 10-6 and be at my house at 9 - 3. I worry how this will affect her ability to properly care for my child. She had said she can handle both. I told her either quites her night nurse job or we will have to let go. Am I being unreasonable or harsh?

Sorry to hear this, her priorities are clearly money.
If quality of care falls due to whatever she does outside of your workday (9am to 3pm), then find another nanny and fire the current one.
You are being reasonable. I would not want to be worrying about a frazzled nanny at my house with any number of children.
Really monitor the quality of care and if she is up to par.