Au pair with young ASD kid?
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Anonymous
| Anyone have experience with bringing on board an au pair for an ASD young kid? We have to admit that one adult can't take both kids (one ASD, one NT) to the park. We now have medical and behavior appointments during the week. Is an au pair a good option to drive to appointments during the week, help a couple hours after school, and take one kid to the park on weekends? Is it hard to get a good match for a special needs kid / ask for this schedule? |
Anonymous
| It will depend on the child and Au Pair. If your child has challenging experience they may not be able to handle it. |
Anonymous
| Wait, if you can’t take two children to the park, then the east answer is to assign her the nt child and have a parent or nanny with the child with asd. Alternatively, just get a special needs nanny. |
Anonymous
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Many au pairs do not work weekends.
Err, when do the parents takes care of their kids? |
Anonymous
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I think you could find a great AP for your family but echo the above comment that the AP would likely be more successful (and therefore happier) primarily caring for the NT kid if the ASD kid is challenging or tends to abscond or whatever.
The snarky comment above is annoying and unnecessary, but the sentiment does have some relevance - I think you'll be more likely to attract and retain an AP if you don't make her do the "harder" job... Sucks but probably true... |
Anonymous
Nice try, au pair, but you signed up for a program where you can be required to work on weekends. Parents take care of their kids during the 123 (or more) hours per week that the au pair isn't working. |
Anonymous
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No. You will be very disappointed by hosting an aupair, trust me.
I have twins. One is on the spectrum and one is NT. We tried the aupair route. It was another person in my house who I needed to support and take care of. I wasn't in a place with my career/family/life in general, where taking on another young person to support was sustainable. It's very difficult to find someone who has any special needs experience. It's tough to find someone with decent english skills which your ASD child will definitely need. We found someone who was a native english speaker which I thought would be better. Who knows. An aupair will need a pretty consistent schedule or a good deal of notice about working hours. They also can leave and switch families with little notice. You take a huge financial risk by paying for program fees ahead of time. If the aupair leaves, you will most likely end up losing money. It worked for a year, but it wasn't an easy year. It made my stress level spike over the holidays. If your ASD child is not super tough to manage and your NT child not super tough to manage, it may work out. Taking the child to appointmetns, etc. is rough. It's your car insurance, your car and if something happens, your financial loss. Finding someone who can drive well is a tough find. There are benefits to an aupair, but if you can afford a nanny, it's a lot of the same risks involved, but it's also less emotional overhead and upfront financial risk for your family. |
Anonymous
Your comment is disgusting and I wish karma on your with a difficult high needs child 
OP, I'm a mom to a level-2 ASD child and another child who is 2 years older. It's so hard to manage when your partner isn't with you, and it's so hard when you can't get a break. I recommend finding respite care through ARC as well. They have sitters who will come for an afternoon to give parents a break. Aupairs are not the best option. Typically young, inexperienced workers who want a visa to open the doors for a longer stay in the US. Their priority is usually not your child. |
Anonymous
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NP and I agree the comment about “where are the parents” is gross. Please do better, person who wrote that.
If the au pair is primarily responsible for the NT child, I think you’ll find the extra pair a hands a huge help. I can’t comment on an au pair’s ability to work with a child on the spectrum - there may be great au pairs out there. But do scrutinize their experience. Our au pair greatly exaggerated her childcare experience. It has been fine, but I literally had to spend the first two months teaching her basics of childcare for children ages 2-5. |
Anonymous
| I agree it will be tough finding a girl who wants to work on weekends. She will probably agree before coming and then realize that most of her AP friends are off on weekends and want to visit DC or NY etc, and she'll be reluctant to taking your kids to the park. |
Anonymous
| AP is not an option at all. You will have to find a nanny very experienced and confortable working with special need children. |
Anonymous
New poster here. There is nothing "gross" about pp's comment. OP wants her au pair to work 7 days a week! It's a valid question. Please do better, poster that doesn't want to spend time with their own kid. |
Anonymous
No, she doesn't. read the post. She wants an aupair who can work hours on the weekend. She doesn't need childcare M-F plus the weekend. Your comment is the perfect example why an aupair is NOT a good idea for families. Unreliable and only want easy gigs. OP, hire a babysitter or professional nanny. |
Anonymous
| I've seen some really great au pairs work with special needs children. I think that as long as the parents are very supportive of the au pair, and she knows exactly what to expect before arriving, you can find a good au pair match. Just like in the U.S. there are young adults who intend to make special needs children their career in some way. Just don't sugarcoat or mislead while in the matching process. |
Anonymous
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No way, au pairs are glorified teenagers and will not be equipped to handle this. You would do a huge disservice to your child, they just can't do it and will set you up to fall.
Maybe if ONLY for the NT child but I wouldn't count on any support for the other. I know it's hard but au pair is not the right choice. |