Cant find a job because of living situation

[Anonymous]

I unfortunately was let go due to my employers going to quarantine out of state, so I’m now job hunting. I had two promising families that wanted to hire me (even checked my references), and both ultimately told me they decided to go with candidates that live alone. I am so frustrated by this. I have two roommates and we live in a 3 level rowhouse. We all have our own bathrooms, so only the kitchen and living area is shared. Neither of my roommates are essential workers. A one bedroom here in DC is at least 1800 per month, and even in the suburbs of MD and VA you cannot find cheaper than $1200 per month. I unfortunately cannot afford that. I understand the preference of someone that lives alone given the pandemic, but it’s unfair because I know a lot of these parents that are rejecting me lived with roommates at some point in their lives because they could not afford a one bed. I’m an immigrant that came here practically with nothing, I am paying off student loan debt, and helping my family in my home country, so I’m sorry I can’t afford to pay $2100 in Columbia Heights. I am almost at the point where I am going to start saying I live alone which is tragic considering I hate lying!

Rant over.

[Anonymous]

Just say you live in a studio in a townhouse. That say, you better be extra vigilant about social distancing from your housemates and isolate as much as possible. Maybe you come off as being careless about covid.

[Anonymous]

Might be worth considering a live-in position? Many families are seeking live-in nannies during this time to ensure safety.

[Anonymous]

At this point, I’d suggest living in as an alternative to lying. Be upfront about your current living situation and offer to live in, if it makes them more comfortable. They should not reduce the pay or add hours, since it is for their benefit. However, they may try to restrict off hours trips; just remind them that you’re going to be outside and distanced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I unfortunately was let go due to my employers going to quarantine out of state, so I’m now job hunting. I had two promising families that wanted to hire me (even checked my references), and both ultimately told me they decided to go with candidates that live alone. I am so frustrated by this. I have two roommates and we live in a 3 level rowhouse. We all have our own bathrooms, so only the kitchen and living area is shared. Neither of my roommates are essential workers. A one bedroom here in DC is at least 1800 per month, and even in the suburbs of MD and VA you cannot find cheaper than $1200 per month. I unfortunately cannot afford that. I understand the preference of someone that lives alone given the pandemic, but it’s unfair because I know a lot of these parents that are rejecting me lived with roommates at some point in their lives because they could not afford a one bed. I’m an immigrant that came here practically with nothing, I am paying off student loan debt, and helping my family in my home country, so I’m sorry I can’t afford to pay $2100 in Columbia Heights. I am almost at the point where I am going to start saying I live alone which is tragic considering I hate lying!

Rant over.

Aside from your housemates, are you practicing social distancing? I think one of the concerns that I’m seeing with friends looking for nannies is that the younger nannies are continuing to socialize at restaurants/bars/parties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I unfortunately was let go due to my employers going to quarantine out of state, so I’m now job hunting. I had two promising families that wanted to hire me (even checked my references), and both ultimately told me they decided to go with candidates that live alone. I am so frustrated by this. I have two roommates and we live in a 3 level rowhouse. We all have our own bathrooms, so only the kitchen and living area is shared. Neither of my roommates are essential workers. A one bedroom here in DC is at least 1800 per month, and even in the suburbs of MD and VA you cannot find cheaper than $1200 per month. I unfortunately cannot afford that. I understand the preference of someone that lives alone given the pandemic, but it’s unfair because I know a lot of these parents that are rejecting me lived with roommates at some point in their lives because they could not afford a one bed. I’m an immigrant that came here practically with nothing, I am paying off student loan debt, and helping my family in my home country, so I’m sorry I can’t afford to pay $2100 in Columbia Heights. I am almost at the point where I am going to start saying I live alone which is tragic considering I hate lying!

Rant over.

Aside from your housemates, are you practicing social distancing? I think one of the concerns that I’m seeing with friends looking for nannies is that the younger nannies are continuing to socialize at restaurants/bars/parties.

+1. And it’s not a question of “fair”, OP. We are in the middle of a pandemic and safety must come first.

[Anonymous]

I feel your pain. I do not have car and use bus or metro for working and parents do not like. Very frustrating

[Anonymous]

You can say that you can move and live alone if they pay you X so you can afford it.

[Anonymous]

Just say you live alone. I told my employers I do not have any roommates and I do. We practice social distancing, have hand sanitizer at the front door, have someone clean the home twice a month, and don't let friends come over.

Its unfair for people to not be hired because of their living situation. Stop mentioning your roommates and say you live alone. Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just say you live alone. I told my employers I do not have any roommates and I do. We practice social distancing, have hand sanitizer at the front door, have someone clean the home twice a month, and don't let friends come over.

Its unfair for people to not be hired because of their living situation. Stop mentioning your roommates and say you live alone. Problem solved.

I'm an MB. If you told me the practices you're taking w/ your roommate I would feel comfortable with that and wouldn't rule you out for the job. If I hired you and discovered that you had lied to me it would be grounds for firing for cause, as per the language in our contract regarding honesty.

Honesty is a total non-negotiable for me. Don't start on a lie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just say you live alone. I told my employers I do not have any roommates and I do. We practice social distancing, have hand sanitizer at the front door, have someone clean the home twice a month, and don't let friends come over.

Its unfair for people to not be hired because of their living situation. Stop mentioning your roommates and say you live alone. Problem solved.

Do not take this advice. This is a horrible betrayal of trust.

We're in the middle of a pandemic. Nothing about it is fair.

[Anonymous]

I would not lie to prospective employers about your living situation.
It wouldn’t be fair.

You can always tell prospective employers that you are renting a room & that you have your own bathroom which may sound better to them.

We are all navigating through this mess of uncharted territory together.
It seems nothing is truly right or wrong in certain situations -
We all just need to make the best of the hand we are dealt.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not lie to prospective employers about your living situation.
It wouldn’t be fair.

You can always tell prospective employers that you are renting a room & that you have your own bathroom which may sound better to them.

We are all navigating through this mess of uncharted territory together.
It seems nothing is truly right or wrong in certain situations -
We all just need to make the best of the hand we are dealt.

Good luck.

This is good advice.

Really what you're talking about is finding a match in attitude between nanny and family. This is always important for all kinds of things (smoking, discipline, sleep training, screen time, outside time/driving safety) and now we have to add to that list risk management and overall approach to mitigating exposure. If either side (nanny or parents) are mismatched in their attitudes it won't be a good fit - so far better to just add this to the things you look for in interviews.

So, parents who are comfortable w/ their kids being in outdoor camps, at the pool, and maybe playing with one or two friends who have similarly quarantined would probably be comfortable with OP's approach. Parents who have been fully quarantined and trying to keep risks to an absolute minimum would not.

This is about getting through the short term also, with an eye to the long-term. Hopefully the kinds of measures we're all taking now will only be needed for a few more months, which changes the nature of a long-term hire. It's all about finding fit, similar approach, and overall comfort. That starts with candor and trust on all sides.

[Anonymous]

What about taking a live-in job?