What would you do?

[Anonymous]

My baby is in a share with another little girl. Both babies are 4 1/2 months. My daughter is very relaxed and easygoing.

The other baby cries. All. The. Time. The other baby cries so much that I know my daughter isn’t getting attention. We’ve had the share for 6 weeks and it doesn’t seem to be improving. The nanny admitted to me that she feels bad because she is almost totally focused on the other baby.

Yes, we have a contract for one year, but any party can give 45 days notice to terminate it.

Thanks for any ideas or suggestions you might have.

[Anonymous]

Terminate. That’s the only option.

[Anonymous]

I am a nanny. Why you guys are attacking to this mom. She is just asking to a simple advice and as a Nanny I understand completely this concern because I am a Nanny and I have worked in a nanny share before. It's not about the pandemic (pandemic or not, we always know babies who cries more than others, whom are fussies than others and whom require even more attention than others. I also can say that when a baby cries all the time with no reason might give lot of work to the nanny and can bring a little stress to the nanny and also the other baby. Because when the other baby cries the relaxed and easygoing baby will cry too, just watching this heavy and not relaxed environment around. I do understand the nanny that she feel bad; and I would feel really bad too because the other baby also will need the same care and attention which is not receiving. Poor little baby. If I was the mommy, if you are not comfortable with this situation regarding to this you as a mommy has all the right to look the best for your baby. You are on time of leaving the share, just let them know in advance that your plans have changed, because I don't think this is going to improve and I can imagine it's getting lot of stress to the nanny and nobody like to work in an environment like that. And you will have to figure out also who is taking the nanny to find a new family to share with or thinking the posibility to keep your own nanny only for your family. Good luck mom.

[Anonymous]

So sorry you are dealing w/this issue right now OP.

My best advice would be to begin the termination process immediately.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

I was in a situation like this caring for 2 five months old babies
Boy and girl the baby boy was easygoing and man the little girl had a voice on her
The dad of the baby boy said to me the way the baby girl cries child services may come for us
Baby girl turn out to be the sweetest ever I believe things will get better
But on the other hand mom you have to feel comfortable in your share situation

[Anonymous]

Definitely leave the share.

[Anonymous]

Are you working from home?
I am wondering why the Nanny doesnt let the other baby cry some of the time. It sounds horrible but I think its what needs to happen. No one wants to hear a screaming baby but this baby is monopolizing everything and its not fair. I would discuss with the Nanny and other parent the options for leaving the other baby where it is for a few mins each time so it doesnt think its getting picked up and held everytime it cries.
The Nanny is probably catering to it more than normal because she knows you are home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you working from home?
I am wondering why the Nanny doesnt let the other baby cry some of the time. It sounds horrible but I think its what needs to happen. No one wants to hear a screaming baby but this baby is monopolizing everything and its not fair. I would discuss with the Nanny and other parent the options for leaving the other baby where it is for a few mins each time so it doesnt think its getting picked up and held everytime it cries.
The Nanny is probably catering to it more than normal because she knows you are home.

Listening to a crying baby is stressful for the nanny. And when one baby cries, the other will start too. It’s an untenable situation in a share.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I am working from home and am upstairs in the house while the nanny and babies are on the first floor. I only see them if I have to go to the kitchen. But I can hear them. Our nanny never complains, so probably wouldn’t complain about the baby crying.

It’s a tough situation all the way around. Thanks for the advice!

[Anonymous]

I’d keep the nanny but get rid of the other baby

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d keep the nanny but get rid of the other baby

This. The other baby probably needs to be at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a nanny. Why you guys are attacking to this mom. She is just asking to a simple advice and as a Nanny I understand completely this concern because I am a Nanny and I have worked in a nanny share before. It's not about the pandemic (pandemic or not, we always know babies who cries more than others, whom are fussies than others and whom require even more attention than others. I also can say that when a baby cries all the time with no reason might give lot of work to the nanny and can bring a little stress to the nanny and also the other baby. Because when the other baby cries the relaxed and easygoing baby will cry too, just watching this heavy and not relaxed environment around. I do understand the nanny that she feel bad; and I would feel really bad too because the other baby also will need the same care and attention which is not receiving. Poor little baby. If I was the mommy, if you are not comfortable with this situation regarding to this you as a mommy has all the right to look the best for your baby. You are on time of leaving the share, just let them know in advance that your plans have changed, because I don't think this is going to improve and I can imagine it's getting lot of stress to the nanny and nobody like to work in an environment like that. And you will have to figure out also who is taking the nanny to find a new family to share with or thinking the posibility to keep your own nanny only for your family. Good luck mom.

What are you talking about? No one had attached the nanny or O,P! As earlier suggested, keep nanny and get rid of other baby.