Babysitting outside of Host family

[Anonymous]

Hi all,

My au pairs have often babysat for friends of the family, neighbors etc. I've always made sure they know it is outside the rules of the program and made sure they understood we have first priority. It has always been fine.

My current AP announced a family had hired her for babysitting. I don't know them and was bothered by the announcement so made it clear what my rules are.

It made me wonder how many other families allow this? She says ALL the aupairs do it (of course that isn't true).

So do you allow it?

Thanks!

[Anonymous]

As long as she knows you have first priority I see nothing wrong with it. I am assuming you give a couple weeks notice if you need her outside of her normaLhours?
Like if you don't normally use her on sat nights but then on a Thurs you ask her to babysit on a Sat but she is sitting for someone else I don't think you can be annoyed about that.

[Anonymous]

Nope, not allowed. Not okay. Many of us have au pairs because we have irregular schedules.......I don't want to have to deal with my neighbor's needs. They can get their own childcare.

[Anonymous]

It's ridiculous to allow it and then not being ok with it because "you don't know the family".
Why do you care ?

[Anonymous]

Nope. Absolutely not. It's in our handbook that this is against visa rules, so it's clear we do not support outside work.

Also told our LCC that I found our outgoing AP (who rematched from our family) that I found them on a babysitting website. Don't think anything happened, but maybe it will be a black mark against her if she leaves another family because she wants an easier gig (why she said she left us).

[Anonymous]

It’s fine if it is your friends and not someone she met at the park? I understand the rules, but you either follow them or you don’t. I know one of the local APs in my neighborhood babysits for other families that she meets in town.

[Anonymous]

No. Against all rules and we want this to remain a good legal program. Our neighbor tried to recruit, the answer was no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope, not allowed. Not okay. Many of us have au pairs because we have irregular schedules.......I don't want to have to deal with my neighbor's needs. They can get their own childcare.

So you just tell her last minute when you need her? What if she has plans?

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't be okay with this. You (not other families) pay the annual agency fee for your AP's services. Plus, it's a violation of the rules.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s fine if it is your friends and not someone she met at the park? I understand the rules, but you either follow them or you don’t. I know one of the local APs in my neighborhood babysits for other families that she meets in town.

First of all its a safety issue.. I know she is safe with my friends. I don't know that with people a friend of a friend of hers recommended. I did tell her it was fine but told her I need the families contact info and details so I can check them out. I also made sure they are paying her enough and not taking advantage of her.

She had made it sound like a regular commitment which I am not ok with. If she is working a few nights here and there we can manage fine. If she is always booked up it will affect our ability to do anything outside of work and that negates part of the reason we got an au pair.

We only really need our AP for school pickups and occasional night outs. She isn't normally scheduled to work in the evenings and if something comes up we ask her to work. She is averaging around 15 hours a week right now so it really isn't a tough gig.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s fine if it is your friends and not someone she met at the park? I understand the rules, but you either follow them or you don’t. I know one of the local APs in my neighborhood babysits for other families that she meets in town.

First of all its a safety issue.. I know she is safe with my friends. I don't know that with people a friend of a friend of hers recommended. I did tell her it was fine but told her I need the families contact info and details so I can check them out. I also made sure they are paying her enough and not taking advantage of her.

She had made it sound like a regular commitment which I am not ok with. If she is working a few nights here and there we can manage fine. If she is always booked up it will affect our ability to do anything outside of work and that negates part of the reason we got an au pair.

We only really need our AP for school pickups and occasional night outs. She isn't normally scheduled to work in the evenings and if something comes up we ask her to work. She is averaging around 15 hours a week right now so it really isn't a tough gig.

Can’t see this ending well. Big no for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi all,

My au pairs have often babysat for friends of the family, neighbors etc. I've always made sure they know it is outside the rules of the program and made sure they understood we have first priority. It has always been fine.

My current AP announced a family had hired her for babysitting. I don't know them and was bothered by the announcement so made it clear what my rules are.

It made me wonder how many other families allow this? She says ALL the aupairs do it (of course that isn't true).

So do you allow it?

Thanks!

So its ok for YOU to break the rule but you have a problem your AP breaking the rule for a family that you don't know. Seriously...?
Both you and your AP should be kicked out of the program.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s fine if it is your friends and not someone she met at the park? I understand the rules, but you either follow them or you don’t. I know one of the local APs in my neighborhood babysits for other families that she meets in town.

First of all its a safety issue.. I know she is safe with my friends. I don't know that with people a friend of a friend of hers recommended. I did tell her it was fine but told her I need the families contact info and details so I can check them out. I also made sure they are paying her enough and not taking advantage of her.

She had made it sound like a regular commitment which I am not ok with. If she is working a few nights here and there we can manage fine. If she is always booked up it will affect our ability to do anything outside of work and that negates part of the reason we got an au pair.

We only really need our AP for school pickups and occasional night outs. She isn't normally scheduled to work in the evenings and if something comes up we ask her to work. She is averaging around 15 hours a week right now so it really isn't a tough gig.

It doesn't matter if her workload is as light as a feather. It does not matter her schedule with you is 5 minutes or 5 hours. You are breaking the program rule. I know your AP is doing much more than school pick ups and occasional date nights.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hi all,

My au pairs have often babysat for friends of the family, neighbors etc. I've always made sure they know it is outside the rules of the program and made sure they understood we have first priority. It has always been fine.

My current AP announced a family had hired her for babysitting. I don't know them and was bothered by the announcement so made it clear what my rules are.

It made me wonder how many other families allow this? She says ALL the aupairs do it (of course that isn't true).

So do you allow it?

Thanks!

So its ok for YOU to break the rule but you have a problem your AP breaking the rule for a family that you don't know. Seriously...?
Both you and your AP should be kicked out of the program.

Not sure that makes sense.. in both cases we are 'breaking the rules'. If you read further you would see I did allow it but want to know the families details first so I can look them up.
I think some people are reading this as me farming my AP out.. its not that at all. I have no problem saying no to my friends. But if the AP's want to babysit I want it to be with someone I know well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s fine if it is your friends and not someone she met at the park? I understand the rules, but you either follow them or you don’t. I know one of the local APs in my neighborhood babysits for other families that she meets in town.

First of all its a safety issue.. I know she is safe with my friends. I don't know that with people a friend of a friend of hers recommended. I did tell her it was fine but told her I need the families contact info and details so I can check them out. I also made sure they are paying her enough and not taking advantage of her.

She had made it sound like a regular commitment which I am not ok with. If she is working a few nights here and there we can manage fine. If she is always booked up it will affect our ability to do anything outside of work and that negates part of the reason we got an au pair.

We only really need our AP for school pickups and occasional night outs. She isn't normally scheduled to work in the evenings and if something comes up we ask her to work. She is averaging around 15 hours a week right now so it really isn't a tough gig.

It doesn't matter if her workload is as light as a feather. It does not matter her schedule with you is 5 minutes or 5 hours. You are breaking the program rule. I know your AP is doing much more than school pick ups and occasional date nights.

You really don't know. Her schedule in the school year is exactly that. She hasn't worked a weekend day yet. I prefer to spend all the time I can with my family.