Keep current nanny or fine a new nanny -- WWYD?

[Anonymous]

Current nanny will have been with us for 3 years when this issue arises. She's been with us since DC2 was only 2 months old-- she started w/ us part-time while I was in school-- and moved to full-time when I went back to work. We have two kids who adore her as much as we do.

She'll be traveling to her home country for the whole month of February, and will be taking 2 more 1-2 week vacations throughout the remainder of the year. It's important for her to travel with her DH, for reasons we understand. She either wants to quit and find part-time or flexible positions, or stay with us if we can accommodate her travel needs.

Our kids are 5 and 3. Nanny really is a gem. We are torn between finding a new full-time nanny, and finding fill-ins for the times she'll be away. It takes a ton of time, resources, stress, money, etc. to find and become comfortable with someone new to fill in for each time, so we are really torn.

[Anonymous]

I would try to keep her if your children love her. I would make it work. Great nannies are not that easy to find.

[Anonymous]

Do you really need full time? 5 year old should be in school and day care for the 3 year old.

[Anonymous]

I would try and keep her if you can swing it.
Does she have any Nanny friends in her circle you could maybe do a share with as a temp thing while she is away in Feb? And take vacation time when she has the other weeks off?

[Anonymous]

I would first try to keep your Nanny.
Do you have any relatives, close friends or neighbors that would be able to assist w/childcare for a week or two?
Or Grandparents willing to help??

Does she have any Nanny peers that she would be able to refer you too?
If this issue becomes too much to handle, then yes....
I suggest that you find someone who won’t need to travel extensively.

Having a Nanny should make your life easier - not tougher.
Good luck.

[Anonymous]

I might try to make this work OP, if she's a great nanny. Replacing and acclimating to a new nanny can be really tough as you say.

We had a long-term nanny who had to go back to her country for six weeks and we used MetroParentRelief for a long-term temp. We also used them for illness and vacation absences a couple of times. I was really pleased w/ them and found Stacey (the owner) really responsive. It isn't the cheapest solution but it carries much more peace of mind then just finding short term care through care.com or something. And it was definitely cheaper than replacing a nanny we trusted and knew.

That said, there also comes a point when working too hard to bend your family's needs to meet a nanny's availability doesn't make sense. Sometimes it's hard to know where that line is...

[Anonymous]

I'd find a new nanny who is more local.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I might try to make this work OP, if she's a great nanny. Replacing and acclimating to a new nanny can be really tough as you say.

We had a long-term nanny who had to go back to her country for six weeks and we used MetroParentRelief for a long-term temp. We also used them for illness and vacation absences a couple of times. I was really pleased w/ them and found Stacey (the owner) really responsive. It isn't the cheapest solution but it carries much more peace of mind then just finding short term care through care.com or something. And it was definitely cheaper than replacing a nanny we trusted and knew.

That said, there also comes a point when working too hard to bend your family's needs to meet a nanny's availability doesn't make sense. Sometimes it's hard to know where that line is...

I agree with this. Using an agency is more costly, but a greater peace of mind and a guarantee for the new nanny to show up every day. If you nanny needs to take 2 months off every year, it would obviously not work. But if rhisnextra trip is a fluke and you can otherwise accommodate her needs, then I would keep her.

[Anonymous]

I would try to keep my nanny unless it turned into even more absences.

[Anonymous]

As someone who just replaced a long term nanny and it was a really hard transition for my kids, I would likely try to keep your nanny, although I know how hard to can be to scramble for back up care.

Is all the travel a one time thing, or will it be on and off for the foreseeable future? If it will be ongoing I may change my mind and say to find someone new, unless she has someone who can fill in for her no problem.

[Anonymous]

OP here, and the month-long trip is not an annual thing, but rather every couple of years. As for the other trips, her DH is a bit older than she is, and is semi-retired. They want to be able to take a couple of 1-2 week trips per year together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you really need full time? 5 year old should be in school and day care for the 3 year old.

Our 5-year-old is in kindergarten, and our soon-to-be 3YO is home. Daycare wouldn't work well for him/us due to some health issues he has.

[Anonymous]

Maybe I’m in the minority here, but nannying is a job. And having an employee out for possibly 2 months for vacation in a 12-month period is a no-go for a lot of jobs. It’s up to you to decide whether it’s worth it. My sense is you are trying to be “nice,” rather than letting her know that just won’t work for you.

[Anonymous]

I would make it work for my kids’ sake. Your nanny has been a loving figure in your youngest child’s life for all her life.

You can make it work, OP. You have a lot of advanced notice and can schedule the same temp nanny from an agency. We get the same nanny over the holidays when our nanny goes back to Africa for the month of December. Our temp nanny also fills in during the year from time to time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, and the month-long trip is not an annual thing, but rather every couple of years. As for the other trips, her DH is a bit older than she is, and is semi-retired. They want to be able to take a couple of 1-2 week trips per year together.

This is completely reasonable. Make it work out for your children.