Old friend who doesn’t understand my love for my charge’s (past and present).

[Anonymous]

I became a nanny after I retired young from another field and have never been happier. I see my former charges every other week and am so close to one family that they made me Godmother to their second baby.

My oldest friend hates kids. She resents and makes comments about my visiting my former charges. She’s been saying things like, “well, I guess I know where I stand” when I can’t do something with her because I committed to seeing one of the kids.

It’s really starting to bug me. I don’t understand how she can be jealous of a child! And visiting them is something I want to do and look forward to.

I’m hoping one of the nannies has some insight on my current situation with my friend. I don’t want to lose her but her comments are really starting to bug me.

[Anonymous]

She just misses you and wants to spend more time with you. Doesn’t matter what the commitment is, it’s the fact that you have regular commitments that appear to be more valuable to you that your time with her.

[Anonymous]

I truly don’t understand adults who are jealous of children. And as a nanny, clearly I don’t understand anyone who hates children.

As long as you keep your plans with her, just ignore her nonsense. I see my past charges because we want to see each other. On my part, it is my choice of “friends”.

[Anonymous]

You cannot live your life for your friend, and no one who says they're your friend should be trying to dictate who you spend time with. Drop the so-called friend, keep the kids. I refuse to waste my time with people who cannot be pleasant. Life is too short.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You cannot live your life for your friend, and no one who says they're your friend should be trying to dictate who you spend time with. Drop the so-called friend, keep the kids. I refuse to waste my time with people who cannot be pleasant. Life is too short.

She also needs to let her former charges go and get on with her life. OP has serious problems. They were a job, not your children. Move on!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You cannot live your life for your friend, and no one who says they're your friend should be trying to dictate who you spend time with. Drop the so-called friend, keep the kids. I refuse to waste my time with people who cannot be pleasant. Life is too short.

She also needs to let her former charges go and get on with her life. OP has serious problems. They were a job, not your children. Move on!

Not true. They were a relationship like any other. As an MB I can promise you that some of your closest friendships will be formed in your work environment no matter what environment it is.

And (hopefully) working with children will always be more than just a job.

I hope you aren’t a nanny. I would never hire a nanny like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You cannot live your life for your friend, and no one who says they're your friend should be trying to dictate who you spend time with. Drop the so-called friend, keep the kids. I refuse to waste my time with people who cannot be pleasant. Life is too short.

She also needs to let her former charges go and get on with her life. OP has serious problems. They were a job, not your children. Move on!

Not true. They were a relationship like any other. As an MB I can promise you that some of your closest friendships will be formed in your work environment no matter what environment it is.

And (hopefully) working with children will always be more than just a job.

I hope you aren’t a nanny. I would never hire a nanny like you.

+1. And “move on” is so trite and meaningless. So 1990s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You cannot live your life for your friend, and no one who says they're your friend should be trying to dictate who you spend time with. Drop the so-called friend, keep the kids. I refuse to waste my time with people who cannot be pleasant. Life is too short.

She also needs to let her former charges go and get on with her life. OP has serious problems. They were a job, not your children. Move on!

Not true. They were a relationship like any other. As an MB I can promise you that some of your closest friendships will be formed in your work environment no matter what environment it is.

And (hopefully) working with children will always be more than just a job.

I hope you aren’t a nanny. I would never hire a nanny like you.

+1. And “move on” is so trite and meaningless. So 1990s

OP here. I’ve never understood “move on” in this context either. I have moved on to a new job that I love; got married; travel extensively on vacation; and finished my degree in Early Childhood Development. Seeing my former charges ever other weekend (one family one weekend and the other on the next) is mutually beneficial to all of us. I love them and they were never abandoned by the person they depended on.

Anyway, thanks for all the other advice.