When AP goes out -

[Anonymous]

I am curious whether most HFs ask APs to give a courtesy text or tell them when taking the car out do you ask AP to let you know if she's taking the car or where or when she will be back? We have no curfew for non work nights, and AP has always given me a courtesy heads up if taking the car but has recently stopped. I am wondering what other shave as car policy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am curious whether most HFs ask APs to give a courtesy text or tell them when taking the car out do you ask AP to let you know if she's taking the car or where or when she will be back? We have no curfew for non work nights, and AP has always given me a courtesy heads up if taking the car but has recently stopped. I am wondering what other shave as car policy.

AP does not have a curfew but my car has one. My car also has to be driven within a specific radius. It's for local driving and has to ask permission to use the car. I have young kids and if something happens to the car and I need to get her I can't pack up my babies and drive to get her at 1:00AM.

No curfew for AP but Car has a curfew. She can choose not to use my car, take Uber, have a friend pick her up or whatever she fancies is she plans of staying out later than my car's curfew.

[Anonymous]

We too have a car curfew and limit where it can be used. And if it’s going to be gone all day somewhere I wouldn’t expect, she needs to tell me (i.e- if she’s going to leave it in the metro parking lot).

[Anonymous]

I have one car and i have never let any of my 4 APs use it. I give them a metro/bus card and a small Uber/Lyft allowance. We are 1 block from the bus and less than a mile from Metro and a million more buses.

She has no curfew. She (all my APs) need to be on duty by 6:30am so if coming home late interfered, a discussion would take place. All my APs were 21+ and sensible so thankfully no issues reporting to work on time. I am a teacher and cannot be late. This is all discussed during the interviews, so no surprises.

[Anonymous]

Former AP here.
With my first host family I didn't have a curfew and didn't need one because I would be off at 9.30pm most nights and after that all I wanted was to sleep.
Then I left and my second (and last) host family gave me a 11pm curfew, which was generous and reasonable, considering I had to start working at 7.15am everyday.
I would have never gone out later than 11pm anyway because I know I need 8 hours of sleep to function well, especially with children

The curfew on the car absolutely makes sense.

[Anonymous]

We have never had a curfew. Our APs and BPs are adults in our home and decide for themselves how much sleep and home time they need to be able to awaken and start work each weekday morning at 6:10, on time and with a smile on their face. In 12 years of hosting, I have had to speak to an AP about burning the candle on both ends exactly once.

[Anonymous]

OP here. What I would really like to know is: for those that provide car for APs personal use,what expectations do you set around car communication? If s/he is taking the car, do you also that s/he let you know they're leaving and how far they're going for example? The courtesy text was nice and I miss it. I am considering putting that in the next handbook, but am curious how others do it.Thanks!

[Anonymous]

We do not expect any communication. If I asked for a communication every time they took the car, then I would feel obligated to respond to that communication, and that would be a hassle to me. If the car is gone, I assume she took it. We have a tracker on the car so I can always see where it is which is enough info for me.

This is for a dedicated AP car though. If the car was shared, then I would feel differently, as I'd likely want to know when it would be back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. What I would really like to know is: for those that provide car for APs personal use,what expectations do you set around car communication? If s/he is taking the car, do you also that s/he let you know they're leaving and how far they're going for example? The courtesy text was nice and I miss it. I am considering putting that in the next handbook, but am curious how others do it.Thanks!

We preempt this by telling APs upfront that the car use is limited to a certain range (in our case, limited to Arlington basically). They don't need to tell us anything more than that. As the year goes on our APs occasionally ask to take it farther out and we usually say yes. But they have to ask. This is the exact same rule I intend to have when my daughter get her driver's license.

[Anonymous]

If you're worried about use and location, get a tracker.

Like PP, if it's a shared car, emphasize AP needs to ask. If it's an extra AP car, then go over rules (local radius, responsible for tickets, driving behavior, additional passengers, car curfew, etc.)

We have noticed that APs drive around more (literally drove from one end of a parking lot to the other of a plaza) and speed/hard brake more when alone with a AP car vs our shared minivan.

[Anonymous]

We have a dedicated ap car and it has a curfew of 1am.
We do not let our car in dc for first 90 days or so. We had an ap “lose” the car in dc first weekend and it was a nightmare. It got towed and we eventually found it.

We are on ap 6; live in Arlington and do not ask where they are going or our car; just non negotiable it is back by 1am.

[Anonymous]

We don't have a curfew for the car or AP. I do ask the AP her general plans when she goes out. I don't know that she would tell me if I didn't ask. Car is not allowed in DC at all. We have a location app that is on her phone and mine, it shows me where she is. She is NOT required to have this on unless she has the car, or if she takes my kids somewhere. If she has my car, I have every right to know where it is. If she doesn't want me to know where she is, she can get a ride with a friend, Uber, whatever and turn off the app.

[Anonymous]

We do not have a dedicated AP car, but our second car is almost always available for our APs to use. We do not have a car curfew, but our handbook states that AP needs to ask when she is planning on using the car. We do not request that our APs tell us where they are going, unless they are leaving the DMV area. That being said, most of the time they share their plans when they ask to use the car.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We don't have a curfew for the car or AP. I do ask the AP her general plans when she goes out. I don't know that she would tell me if I didn't ask. Car is not allowed in DC at all. We have a location app that is on her phone and mine, it shows me where she is. She is NOT required to have this on unless she has the car, or if she takes my kids somewhere. If she has my car, I have every right to know where it is. If she doesn't want me to know where she is, she can get a ride with a friend, Uber, whatever and turn off the app.

I like this and am going to institute this for our next AP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We don't have a curfew for the car or AP. I do ask the AP her general plans when she goes out. I don't know that she would tell me if I didn't ask. Car is not allowed in DC at all. We have a location app that is on her phone and mine, it shows me where she is. She is NOT required to have this on unless she has the car, or if she takes my kids somewhere. If she has my car, I have every right to know where it is. If she doesn't want me to know where she is, she can get a ride with a friend, Uber, whatever and turn off the app.

I like this and am going to institute this for our next AP.

Wouldn’t it be more effective to have a location tracker on the car? It also sounds like the location tracker gives you information about the quality of driving, which is very important in my opinion.