Nanny lied about child's whereabouts?
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Anonymous
| Our nanny has been with us for about four months. DS is about seven months old. Generally, we like her a lot, but recently, we've caught her in some lies about the whereabouts of our child that have me Beth concerned. Her close friend nannies a little girl in the neighblrhood about DS's age and they like to meet up for play dates at the park or at our house. We've said that's fine, and I know they meet up pretty much every day. However, we've made it very clear that we don't want DS going to other people's houses unless we know the family. A friend saw my DS and nanny in the apartment complex where I know the little girl lives and texted me because she thought it was odd. I wanted to give nanny a chance to volunteer the information,so I asked what they did that afternoon and she said they stayed home and rested. I was shocked that she would lie and now really don't trust her. What would you do? |
Anonymous
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Confront her gently - your friend who saw her might be wrong - and stress the importance of following the rules as set out.
Give her another chance but make sure she knows what is expected/demanded. |
Anonymous
| I would not be happy about this. Just confront her face to face. |
Anonymous
| Your nanny has shown her friend is more important than well being of your baby. She is going to get resentful or continue doing it. I would start looking for a new nanny. |
Anonymous
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"Nanny, I need to ask you about something. I was chatting with a friend last night and she mentioned having seen you and Little Jimmy that afternoon. She said she saw you in the parking lot at XXX . Were you there?"
Then wait. If she comes clean then you ask "Why did you tell me that you had stayed home?" and take it from there. I MIGHT let one instance of this pass, maybe. A lot would depend on how she responded during the conversation. But it would seriously undermine my trust and I would tell her that. Violation of trust is a firing offense in our house. |
Anonymous
| She may be trying to do what is best for your child despite your efforts otherwise and nanny just wants to protect your feelings. Let your kid go and live and explore and grow up normal please. Give nanny and bonus to say sorry and let her do her job. |
Anonymous
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Did your friend see nanny inside the apartment or just AT the complex...like maybe they were waiting on the other nanny to come out so they could go for a walk or something? Just because she was at the complex doesn't mean she was in someone else's home. You may be reading too much into what the friend said. Also, is your friend 110% sure it was nanny and your kid and not someone who bears a resemblance?
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Anonymous
That is patently ridiculous. A nanny's job is to care for a child in the manner in which the employers instruct. A nanny who lies about where the child is, and/or one who intentionally flouts the parents' explicit direction (as you're advising) should be fired. |
Anonymous
| Fired |
Anonymous
A nanny's JOB is to do what is best for the child, as you can see in certain cases that would include calling CPS on a bad parent, etc. A nanny's JOB is not to blindly follow parents instructions. |
Anonymous
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Your friend is a busybody and unless she has photos of your nanny in other nanny's apt, then she has zero proof. Obviously, you do not trust your nanny so fire her and you should stay home.and take care of your child.
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Anonymous
You are giving the most extreme case. In this instance, the nanny was told NOT to take the child to any unapproved home by her employers. She did not follow the instructions and should be called out for it the first time and fired if it happens again. If you, as a nanny, feel the employer's rules are wrong then you quit. |
Anonymous
| I'd get rid of her or at a minimum give a phone or put one in the diaper bag with a GPS so you can track her during work hours. Ask her to take pictures for you regularly. OP has the right to instruct the nanny on how to care for her child and where/when she is allowed to go places. |
Anonymous
This has nothing to do with a bad parent and yes, it is their job to follow the parents instructions. This is a job.. a paid job. Its not social hour. |
Anonymous
I would be super-miffed that she would lie to my face!!  :
And I would then fire her for lack of integrity. Imagine all of the other stuff she likely has AND WILL lie to you about. I wouldn't entrust my child to a flat out liar. My guess? This is a young 20-something Nanny?? |