6 year old and 1 year old activities

[Anonymous]

I'm spending the summer caring for a 6 year old, B, and his baby sister, G, who turned 1 in May. Things have been going fairly well, but I'm having a lot of trouble coming up with projects and activities they can both be involved in.

B loves art projects, which is great, but he likes "big kid" projects; right now he's really into making friendship bracelets and sewing, which aren't things G can participate in. G still chews on everything so she isn't ready for playdough or painting or using crayons yet. B also likes wild animals; he loves reading books about them-- I wish we could go to the zoo but they live too far away. B likes baking and science experiments, but G can't participate in those things yet. B also enjoys building, like building a fort in the dining room or building with legos, but every time he builds something G invariably comes and destroys it, which leads to tears.

B does not seem to enjoy anything that involves being physical or being outside. Every time we go to the park it's a struggle to get him to leave the house, and then he sits on a bench and asks when we can go home. I've tried playing music with them and dancing, G loves it but B refuses to participate. G is very typical for her age, almost walking, pretty happy most of the time, and likes her baby toys.

I can't seem to do one activity with both of them at the same time. Every day I set B up with a big kid activity, and then set G up with some toys, and then I'll help B for a minute or two and then G cries for attention, so I sit with her and within a minute or so B starts asking me to help him again, ad nauseam. Every day for the past 3 weeks, 45 hours a week, has been a non-stop shuffle between B and G. I feel drained, and it also feels like neither of them is happy with the way my time is being divided either.

I've tried to encourage B to do more baby friendly things with G, like throwing the ball to each other or building block towers for G to knock over, but B gets bored of those activities within 10 seconds and wants to do something else. The biggest success I've had is reading together; G usually sits with us pretty nicely even through B's big kid stories, but of course we can't read all day.

I just wish there were some activities they could both participate in. It is a big age difference though. Any suggestions?

[Anonymous]

I mean, just-turned-one year olds can't really participate in activities at all, so... no. Your best bet is to do things with B that G enjoys watching or can havr something similar looking to play with next to.

[Anonymous]

Put G in a high chair while you bake/cook with B. You can give G some ice cubes to play with or bowls to bang on, things like that.

Do they have a baby pool?
Does G take a morning nap where you can focus more on B? Or an afternoon nap?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Put G in a high chair while you bake/cook with B. You can give G some ice cubes to play with or bowls to bang on, things like that.

Do they have a baby pool?
Does G take a morning nap where you can focus more on B? Or an afternoon nap?

I have tried baking with B while G was in the high chair. It did not go well... I gave G spoons and pans to bang with, and other toys, but within 30 secs they were all on the floor and G was crying wanting to get up/out. Tried putting her on the floor but then she started crying wanting to be held. Meanwhile B needed a lot of help, more than I thought a 6 year old would, with everything from pouring and measuring, to even just stirring, B whined and fussed about needing help; I pretty much had to do the entire thing myself all while holding 28 pound G. After writing this out I'm now realizing that I guess B doesn't like to bake. I thought he did because every time I mention it he gets very excited, but now I'm thinking he's just excited about the end result....

They don't have a baby pool. They have a small backyard, and an scorn smaller from yard. They have a small water table which is great for G, but it's too small for B, and he's not even remotely interested in it. I've been asking MB to get a sprinkler; maybe I'll bring that up again... they live near a community pool but B isn't proficient enough with swimming for MB to feel comfortable with me taking them both to the pool.

G takes one afternoon nap a day, about 1.5-2 hours. B has quiet time in his room for 45 mins while G naps; I put G down, then B and I read books for 10 mins, then B has 45 mins of quiet time, and usually wants to read another book or two. After that we usually have 30-45 mins of baby free time to do an activity. It's not a ton of time, but it is something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Put G in a high chair while you bake/cook with B. You can give G some ice cubes to play with or bowls to bang on, things like that.

Do they have a baby pool?
Does G take a morning nap where you can focus more on B? Or an afternoon nap?

I wouldn't give G any ice cubes to "play" with @her age.

They may pose a choking hazard.

[Anonymous]

That is a difficult age disparity. Sounds like you are trying to do a good job for both kids, and I commend you for that.

I wonder how hide and seek would go over? You and the baby together go looking for the older one. You and baby hide together while the boy looks for you two.

[Anonymous]

Blow bubbles with them, get them to catch them.

[Anonymous]

When my kids were 1 and 4, I toted the baby around in a metal frame backpack. That way, the baby got to be "held" but I still had my hands free. I would tote the baby in the backpack while I put laundry away, vacuumed the house, got dinner ready. When I went shopping, I preferred the backpack to a stroller. The baby would watch what I was doing over my shoulder. Sometimes she would get restless and want out, but generally if I kept moving, she was content.

I had a backpack like this: https://www.amazon.com/Kelty-Tour-Child-Carrier-Legion/dp/B01N9MVP60/ref=dp_ob_title_sports

They are expensive, but sometimes you can find them at baby consignment shops for around $50.

I liked my backpack so much that I bought backpacks just like it for friends. Hardly any of them liked them. They said it hurt their back.

I became a nanny at age 51. The first family I nannied for, I started when the baby was 7 months old. I bought a metal frame backpack at a yard sale for $10. I toted her around in it all the time. We both loved it. Her first word was backpack.

Anyway, I was thinking that if you had a backpack, you could put the little one in that, then the 6 year old could go outside and ride his bike or scooter, etc. while you and the baby supervise.

[Anonymous]

I was also going to suggest babywearing but just fet a toddler soft-structured carrier or a meh dai not a hiking carrier. That would be impossible indoors.

Also a few other things: both kids are being inflexible but only one of them can be talked to about it. I would talk to 6 clearly and directly about the fact that you will give each of them a turn to have your main attention at different times of the day and that you will also have times when they share your attention. My guess is that a lot of his whining is because it works--if he plays independently, you play with his sister. If he is whiny and demanding, you play with him. Break that cycle. Make a few times during the day "his" and a few times "hers" and keep those times sacred. If he complains, too bad. He will get his turn.

I would suggest breaking the day down this way:
Right after breakfast, go out to the park and you focus on 1. Explain to 6 that you can only focus on him during project time if 1 is in the carrier so 1 needs time to practice running, climbing and playing. He can choose to sit on the bench and stare at the sky for 45 minutes if he wants to. My guess is that when that behavior gets no catering or change of plans or attention from you then he will decide to swing or climb or play at least a little. If not, daydreaming on a park bench is a perfectly acceptable activity.
When you get home, give them a snack and set 1 up with some toys and focus on anninteractive project with 6. If 1 wants to be held, put her up on your back in a carrier and have a few books or toys handy that she can hold and chew on. She can be worn or go play in a contained area but your main focus is on doing the project with brother.

After that, you get out some baby toys and play with 1 for about 20 minutes.

Then sit on the floor with 6 and read books together for 20 minutes. 1 can look at board books (especially sensory books like the "that's not my car" series or books with mirrors or play with toys or just climb all over you, but your voice and eyes are focused on reading with 6.

Then lunchtime for both and naptime/quiet time. Instead of spending all of nap time reading, have an hour-long project or building session first then read at the end if there's time and inclination.

Wakeup, snack and do a joint activity. Paint with homemade, edible paint, blowing bubbles, sensory art with all edible ingredients, water play, etc. Look for things 1 can do safely then pick a few that 6 might enjoy too. A few examples from the top of my head: squirt some hair gel into ziplocs and tape to the windows. 1 can just squish it around randomly, but 6 can practice writing letters. Or make sidewalk paint with cornstarch, water and food coloring. Fill the water table with unflavored green jello and figurines of animals that live in a marsh, or freeze plastic artic figurines in a tupperware container with water and let the kids melt the ice to free the animals, or soak chia seeds in water to make sticky mud and have farm animals.

After your sensory project, give everyone a rinse in the hose and then it is 1's turn for time focused on her until dinner.

Be consistent in your approach for a few weeks and I suspect the both will adjust rapidly.

[Anonymous]

^^ PP - Awesome suggestions!