Cancelling without an excuse

[Anonymous]

We have to supplement our au pair's hours with teen babysitters, and have found a few that we like. One girl, who hs always seemed great and very respectful and punctual, cancelled 24 hrs before working by saying that something came up and she couldn't make it. That was it- no details or profuse apology. I can't wrap my head around what this is about? My husband says I'm overthinking it but it makes me want to not use her again, even though I really liked her. It just sort of leaves me thinking that maybe she doesn't understand what an enormous burden it puts on us for a last minute cancellation. Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

Profuse apology for cancelling 24 HOURS before a BABYSITTING JOB??? Your husband is right and you need to seriously adjust your expectations or life is going to be real difficult for you (though I suspect it already is).

[Anonymous]

You're totally over-thinking it. And she's right to not give you a reason. I NEVER give people a reason why I'm saying no. I don't want to deal with them trying to tell me why my reason isn't a reason.

24 hours for a teenage babysitter to cancel is totally fine. You claimed you had a few. Just call the next one you know. You're making a MUCH bigger deal of this than you should. Your husband is right. And this is not an enormous burden. Stop being dramatic. This is one extra call, maybe two.

[Anonymous]

If it is that great of a "BURDEN" you should not be placing it in the hands of a teenage babysitter.

[Anonymous]

Hire older, mature sitters.

You know how we all were as teens.....

[Anonymous]

If you are supplementing your au pair's hours to cover your needs (as opposed to extras like date nights), then you need to hire a real employee. Your teen babysitter, who is one of many, and only works a few hours a week for you, is not thinking of this as a nanny job. She's thinking of it as a babysitting job.

My doctor friends who have an au pair also use daycare 1 day a week to keep her under her hours.

[Anonymous]

Either do daycare, like PP suggested, or hire a part-time nanny (during the school day would be great, you could get a fantastic split shift nanny).

[Anonymous]

Teen babysitters can be unreliable, like someone said, hire a more mature person.

[Anonymous]

She gave you 24 hours notice and does not owe you an explanation.

[Anonymous]

She's a teenager. Sounds like she handled it pretty well, given that you had a full day's notice. It's none of your business why she needed to cancel.

If you decide not to use her again as a result that's your prerogative. But I'd give her another chance if she's been reliable thus far.

You can't expect anyone else, let alone a teenage babysitter, to worry about your "emotional burden".

[Anonymous]

Sounds like even the people who think you are overreacting are telling you to fire her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like even the people who think you are overreacting are telling you to fire her.

No, we're saying it's up to OP about whether she calls her again (firing implies that it's a standing appointment, not call-as-you-go), but we do think she's overreacting, and most wouldn't hesitate to call the young lady again.

[Anonymous]

Meh, she's a kid, so to her, 24 hours is generous. You don't know what came up and it is ok that she didn't tell you. She made the choice not to work, and that is OK, even though it's inconvenient for you.

If it was me, and I liked her and she wasn't usually a flake, I would totally hire her again.

[Anonymous]

24 hours seems pretty responsible and if she's just someone you use once in awhile and a teenager to boot, of course she prioritizes other things. If she were a sneakier kid, she'd have cancelled at the last minute saying she was sick; instead, she was totally responsible about it, leading to this blowback. If I were you, I'd give her another chance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like even the people who think you are overreacting are telling you to fire her.

No, we're saying it's up to OP about whether she calls her again (firing implies that it's a standing appointment, not call-as-you-go), but we do think she's overreacting, and most wouldn't hesitate to call the young lady again.

I think it depends on what she is using her for. If OP needs to go to work, then she needs to find someone more reliable. I teach a class once a week and have a teenage babysitter while I am gone. She has never done this, and if she did, I would probably let her go. Sometimes you need reliable childcare, even if it is not that frequent.