What would you do in my shoes? Replacing nanny
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Anonymous
| Our nanny has been with us for the better part of a year and while we think highly of her, she does not fulfill our needs and we see this getting only worse as our child gets older. We would like to look for her replacement and right now is a really good time to look; there are many experienced nannies on the market looking for September start leaving families where the youngest kid will be starting full-time school. The problem is that the nanny's husband, who used to be the primary breadwinner, has been out of work due to medical issues and while I thought he would be back to work by September, I no longer think this is the case due to what the nanny told me today of his condition. We would give the nanny plenty of notice and hopefully, she can find a new job during that time, but what if she doesn't? And even if she manages to, I feel guilty about putting her through the stress of a job search given her husband's poor health and their financial condition. At the same time, I do not want to put off hiring a new nanny because of the large pool of candidates right now and because I believe it will get only harder to replace the current nanny the longer she is with us. I am thinking give her a month's notice (longer, if we can). And when we give notice, I can let her know that in the event that she doesn't find a new position by her last day, we can give her weekend hours about half her current hours until she does find something, that hopefully will take a little of the stress off of her. Would this be sufficient? Or is there a better way of handling our situation? |
Anonymous
| The reality is that her job search is not your problem. If you want to give her a month's notice, do it. But if you're letting her go for cause I don't know why you'd want her to babysit on weekends. |
Anonymous
| Can you have kinds of a come to Jesus conversation with her? Let her know exactly what needs to happen to meet your needs before you let her go? |
Anonymous
|
Do what is right for your family OP.
Your plan for one month's notice is fair and thoughtful. I do agree that you should not plan to continue to employ her (or expect her to be pleased about that) when you let her go. A clean break will be better for everyone. Later, after she has found another job, then maybe you can reconnect w/ her but for now be clean and final. It is more professional that way anyway. An additional thing you can do is write a strong letter of recommendation and make it clear that you are willing to serve as a reference. |
Anonymous
The OP said the nanny "doesn't fulfill our needs"--I didn't get the impression that the nanny something BAD like put the child's safety in jeopardy or steal. I'm assuming it's something like the nanny can't drive and OP wants a nanny who can drive her child to activities. Something like that is often ok for a Saturday night babysitter, but not for every day continuous care. |
Anonymous
Op said the cause is the nanny's husband is sick and not able to work. So she wants to fire the nanny. How nice. 
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Anonymous
| My employer could care less about demands of my husband's job. It is about my performance, it sucks, but if nanny is not meeting the family needs they need to do what is best for them. |
Anonymous
She did not say that at all. She said that the nanny's husband being out of work makes her feel badly for letting the nanny go. |
Anonymous
| What exactly is the problem with the nanny and what do you think will change by replacing her? |
Anonymous
|
OP you need to put your family needs first. A months notice is fair and you should be ready with backup care that can start immediately after you speak to her. Yes her personal circumstances are difficult at the moment however this is an employment relationship not a charity/donor case.
That said - what exactly is the issue with the nanny? |
Anonymous
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The issue(s) that you have w/her now.....is there any possible way that you can communicate w/her directly & try to see if maybe they can be rectified?
If that is not an option, then I say you must do what is in the best interest of your family. Her issues are not your own. But practicing a bit of compassion never hurt either. My best advice would be to give her a full months notice, then offer weekend hours if she will need them. Her choice. To me, this is the most fairest solution that I can think of. Good luck. |
Anonymous
| How do you think highly of an employee that doesn't fulfill your kids needs? I would think if you think highly of her it would be worth a conversation and attempt to rectify the issue unless its something like she doesn't drive and isn't willing to learn how. |
Anonymous
How in the world did you come to that conclusion? Spend more time learning to read and less time choosing the emoticon that best meets your needs. |
Anonymous
Maybe it's like the nanny my brother hired: the woman is an older lady in her 60's and for a newborn/infant/new walker the nanny is great. But by the time my niece is 2, the nanny won't be able to dash after the baby if she runs into the street or pick her up. So the nanny will no longer meet their needs. Even though she loves the baby and |
Anonymous
| If she isn't meeting your needs now how could she meet your needs later? Just tell her, give her decent severence, and if she ends up applying for unemployment, don't fight it. |