Should a prospective Nanny ask questions at the interview also?

[D-ATX]

When interviewing with a family for a possible position as their nanny, is it commonplace to ask questions of the family as well, specifically for references about the family from previous nannies? I took a job in the past with a man who ended up treating me very badly in the end. I came to find out completely by chance from the director of a local nanny agency that he had a high turnover of their nannies and was very difficult to deal with. I wish I had the foresight to ask him for his references. Also, would it be strange to ask for a background check on them too to make sure that I will be in a safe work environment? What is the correct protocol in your opinion?

On my end, I am supportive of cameras, drug tests, background checks, references, and honesty clauses because I don't have anything to hide. Should I expect the same from a family I work for?

[Anonymous]

He'll yes you should ask questions. You are working, alone in a stranger's house and I would do a criminal and credit check.

[Anonymous]

Yes I ask questions. However I don't ask for references from them and I don't do a background check.

[Anonymous]

I would not be put off if you asked for references. Asking for a background check would be a little unusual, but do the placement agencies do this before accepting families as clients? If so, that makes sense to me. If not, then yes, I would agree and just assume you had a bad prior experience. As long as you were nice about how you ask, rather than acting entitled and like it's beneath you to work with us, then I'd be happy to do it.

[Anonymous]

MB here.

Of course you should ask questions. Lots of them. Including "can you tell me if you've had a nanny before and if so, what the tenure was?" Can you talk about why you've had such turnover?

I am impressed by candidates who ask smart questions.

I would not, however, provide references on prior nannies. (Of course, we've only had two - one for 3+ years and now a second.) But I just wouldn't give that information out. A smart nanny however can ask the right questions that tell him/her whether this employer has a history of nanny turnover, has reasonable expectations, compensates well, etc...

[D-ATX]

Thanks everyone for the opinions. I've never gone through an agency. I was trying to get in with one and was prevented because of that employers animosity. Even with his track record, it was his word against mine. I completely understood the agencies position at that time. Better safe than sorry when endorsing nannies. Plus, I was 22 at the time and very naive. The situation ended badly, but looking back, there were red flags I should have noticed.

The heartbreak led to me leaving the nanny role for several years. I worked with children in other capacities instead. Since then, I've decided to get a degree in Child Development so that I can have more than a reference to show that I know what I'm doing, and that I've invested into learning everything I can about providing quality childcare. I've been building up my reputation again as a babysitter, and now I'm thinking about resuming a nanny role.

Having a forum like this is wonderful! I love hearing from other nannies and parents.

[Anonymous]

Of course it's acceptable to ask questions of the family. But keep in mind if someone is hiring a nanny for the first time, they won't be able to give you references from prior nannies since there won't be any.

[Anonymous]

FTP don't have references, but everyone else should have at least one or two people who have babysat, nannied or taught the child. That person can speak about whether payment was timely and accurate, whether the contract hours were upheld or parents were late 2+ times per week, how the parents treated you, what the child is like, etc. I serve as a reference for one of my former DBs, and those are the things that get asked. Most nannies don't bother to ask, and some families don't have nannies as references because they terminate when the cheap nanny care goes downhill. I always ask to speak to one or two references that know both the parents and child, but aren't family. For me, it's a red flag if the only people that know both well are family, because that means that I'll be working weekends, and possibly 24/7. If the position is for weekends of 24 hour care, obviously that's different.

As a live-in nanny, I ask if a family is *willing* to have a background check run. I expect the family to answer that it's fine if I want to run one, and if they won't consider it, it's a red flag for me. However, I've only run the check twice, because usually that's just a test to me. The vast majority of issues that may come up between a family and live-in nanny won't show up on a background check.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not be put off if you asked for references. Asking for a background check would be a little unusual, but do the placement agencies do this before accepting families as clients? If so, that makes sense to me. If not, then yes, I would agree and just assume you had a bad prior experience. As long as you were nice about how you ask, rather than acting entitled and like it's beneath you to work with us, then I'd be happy to do it.

with us ???of course she's entitled by law!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not be put off if you asked for references. Asking for a background check would be a little unusual, but do the placement agencies do this before accepting families as clients? If so, that makes sense to me. If not, then yes, I would agree and just assume you had a bad prior experience. As long as you were nice about how you ask, rather than acting entitled and like it's beneath you to work with us, then I'd be happy to do it.

with us ???of course she's entitled by law!

You have to understand you pay only little you expect a lot ? stop assuming that you provide the reference. Don't need any extra problem if you need my help this is what I can tell you! Hope I'm not being offensive my friend.

[Anonymous]

D-ATX wrote:When interviewing with a family for a possible position as their nanny, is it commonplace to ask questions of the family as well, specifically for references about the family from previous nannies? I took a job in the past with a man who ended up treating me very badly in the end. I came to find out completely by chance from the director of a local nanny agency that he had a high turnover of their nannies and was very difficult to deal with. I wish I had the foresight to ask him for his references. Also, would it be strange to ask for a background check on them too to make sure that I will be in a safe work environment? What is the correct protocol in your opinion?

On my end, I am supportive of cameras, drug tests, background checks, references, and honesty clauses because I don't have anything to hide. Should I expect the same from a family I work for?

not necessarily you don't know what's coming up after you start working ! It's always good to wait see! You end up working with the weirdos you don't know !

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:FTP don't have references, but everyone else should have at least one or two people who have babysat, nannied or taught the child. That person can speak about whether payment was timely and accurate, whether the contract hours were upheld or parents were late 2+ times per week, how the parents treated you, what the child is like, etc. I serve as a reference for one of my former DBs, and those are the things that get asked. Most nannies don't bother to ask, and some families don't have nannies as references because they terminate when the cheap nanny care goes downhill. I always ask to speak to one or two references that know both the parents and child, but aren't family. For me, it's a red flag if the only people that know both well are family, because that means that I'll be working weekends, and possibly 24/7. If the position is for weekends of 24 hour care, obviously that's different.

As a live-in nanny, I ask if a family is *willing* to have a background check run. I expect the family to answer that it's fine if I want to run one, and if they won't consider it, it's a red flag for me. However, I've only run the check twice, because usually that's just a test to me. The vast majority of issues that may come up between a family and live-in nanny won't show up on a background check.

This (bolded) is untrue - when I hired a nanny my daughter was three months old and nobody besides DH or I had ever been in charge of her.

[Anonymous]

Stupid post of course they should asks questions. if I was the interviewer and they didn't I would think something was weird. Can't believe someone asked this question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FTP don't have references, but everyone else should have at least one or two people who have babysat, nannied or taught the child. That person can speak about whether payment was timely and accurate, whether the contract hours were upheld or parents were late 2+ times per week, how the parents treated you, what the child is like, etc. I serve as a reference for one of my former DBs, and those are the things that get asked. Most nannies don't bother to ask, and some families don't have nannies as references because they terminate when the cheap nanny care goes downhill. I always ask to speak to one or two references that know both the parents and child, but aren't family. For me, it's a red flag if the only people that know both well are family, because that means that I'll be working weekends, and possibly 24/7. If the position is for weekends of 24 hour care, obviously that's different.

As a live-in nanny, I ask if a family is *willing* to have a background check run. I expect the family to answer that it's fine if I want to run one, and if they won't consider it, it's a red flag for me. However, I've only run the check twice, because usually that's just a test to me. The vast majority of issues that may come up between a family and live-in nanny won't show up on a background check.

This (bolded) is untrue - when I hired a nanny my daughter was three months old and nobody besides DH or I had ever been in charge of her.

You're a FTP (first-time parent), therefore you're not in the everyone else...

[Anonymous]

While some families may take issue w/this, I personally think it is a wonderful idea as well as a smart one.

Any family eager to have you as their nanny will appreciate that you have the common sense to ask them about themselves. After all, you are working in their home & will be around them who in the beginning will be complete strangers to you.

By requesting references, if a family has nothing to hide & has kept a good relationship w/their previous caregivers, they should have no hesitation in giving you what you request.

I have had some families even volunteer info to me which has always boded well for me in the beginning. It showed me that I would be working for fair + sensible employers.