Charge doesn't like to clean up

[Anonymous]

So my charge is 3 years old and attends montessori school so she's very independent. However, when at home the mom let's her get away with whatever she wants so when charge is playing, she refuses to clean up after her self and runs to her mom to cry and mom ends up asking me to clean up after her.. I've spoken with her teacher and have taken seminars at the school, she's old enough to clean up and go potty by herself and she does at school! Teacher strictly said do not ask her, tell her, but as many of you know toddlers are so hard to handle with parents around. Any nannies deal with this?

[Anonymous]

Has mb attended seminars and talked to the teacher? I would talk to mb about doing those and maybe you can talk to the teacher and she can talk to mb about how to handle the child at home

[Anonymous]

The school is very active with parents and caregivers. The MB is an overall passive person so as long as the kid doesn't cry, she gives in.. Even if she wants ice cream for lunch.

[Anonymous]

I don't know much about the Montessori program, and maybe this is entirely out of the philosophy. But when my 3 y/o doesn't want to clean up, I hold her upside down by her feet and have her start picking up toys that way. It gets her laughing and in a different frame of mind, and she will usually start picking them up.

I always imagine that inside their little brains the neural pathways and chemicals are all set up to say "no" and be defiant. If you want a different response, you are going to have to shake things up and reset their brains on a different path. Do a magic trick, do something physical, play a little game, etc.

[Anonymous]

The selfish mother is your only problem, not the poor child. What's the mother doing with you at home, anyways?

[Anonymous]

The Barney Clean Up song. I know, I hate it too but it works. We clean up together.

[Anonymous]

My charges don't get to move on to the next project or toy until the last one is tidied, but it doesn't really matter. Noone LIKES putting shit away. We do it because we have to. Her mom has taught her that she DOESN'T have to. The nanny will do it. You need to talk to MB about this, decide to let it slide and be the maid, or decide it's not worth it and quit.