When is an uneducated but practical nanny a good fit?

[Anonymous]

My husband and I are first time parents. Last year, we did a lot of interviewing and vetting for a nanny. We thought we had the best candidate. Our nanny came to us with glowing reviews from all references and was well known and highly regarded in our neighborhood. Our nanny is hard working, pragmatic (finds solutions to any issues we bring up) and reliable. There have been some issues with winter illness and transportation due to the weather. Other than that, we are pleased with the schedule she has our baby on, the attention and care she gives to hwe. Our nanny is not educated and it is starting to be an issue for me. For DH, not so much. For example, our nanny didn't know basic safety of microwaving breast milk. She did not have experience with exclusively breastfed babies. There were some issues that we brought up that she thought creatively, but it wasn't a safe solution. She did not know how to read dosage instructions. One time she gave our son Tylenol instead of his vitamins.

DH is pretty positive that the other family that hired her before us wrote her emails and resume for her during the interview process. Nanny does not text because she is not a confident speller. Sometimes her tone is not the best and she doesn't get social cues. There have been communication issues.

Our baby is very happy with her, but she doesn't think outside the box. Baby goes to the recreation center, library, park in nicer weather. She does not arrange play dates with other babies.

DH is happy with the situation, but I would like a more educated nanny. For the price we are paying for the care of our daughter, I'd like a nanny with more expertise in developmental milestones and appropriate play. I'd like someone who takes initiative to organize creative outings for our toddler aged daughter and doesn't relay on cost-prohibitive classes. We are already paying a lot for nanny so music and dance classes or language lessons are not adequate.

I really admire our daughter's nanny. She is a hard worker but not a good fit. I'm having a hard time convincing DH that our daughter would be better matched with a more educated nanny. I think our nanny is okay for a baby, but not a toddler. Her ideas about potty training, discipline and nutrition are outdated and somewhat unsafe. I've tried to encourage her to attend classes at the local breastfeeding center or community college, but she is uninterested. I feel like I am going to be unhappy without another nanny.

If you have been in this situation, what would you do? For the record, we pay approximately $20 before taxes, offer two weeks paid vacation, 10 sick days and all federal holidays paid. We also provide $100 in Metro cards and all meals, plus incidentals for our daughter.

[Anonymous]

I think you need to have a sit down with her and discuss your issues. If not find a new nanny. Some of the things you have mentioned seem like common sense though.

[Anonymous]

We hired a very bright and educated nanny and I highly recommend it. Her grammar and vocabulary are better than mine and she knows the milestones and can challenge DS without frustrating him. She has been with us since his birth, is also a problem solver and has a very logical mind.

I posted once before about how impressed I was when DS became interested in dinosaurs and I saw an adult book in her bag about dinosaurs! She said she wanted to learn the names of the various dinosaurs to be precise in her language with DS.

PS I was told to never microwave breast milk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We hired a very bright and educated nanny and I highly recommend it. Her grammar and vocabulary are better than mine and she knows the milestones and can challenge DS without frustrating him. She has been with us since his birth, is also a problem solver and has a very logical mind.

I posted once before about how impressed I was when DS became interested in dinosaurs and I saw an adult book in her bag about dinosaurs! She said she wanted to learn the names of the various dinosaurs to be precise in her language with DS.

PS I was told to never microwave breast milk.

You look your nanny bag?!!i can't believe that!!

[Anonymous]

Hi this what I think, kids who are successful learners have usually been successful before they came to school.
Parents especially, but also preschool teachers nannies,and other important adults in they lives have encouraged them to achieve.when they begin formal schooling,these students expect to do well.i have been a nanny for more the 24 years and I know what am talking about,when you do interview ask the candidate if she's like to read,how is her social life,how she's spend her week and days,if she's take so long to respond don't hire her.
My advice,hire nannies from Brasil,they are modern and easy out going...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi this what I think, kids who are successful learners have usually been successful before they came to school.
Parents especially, but also preschool teachers nannies,and other important adults in they lives have encouraged them to achieve.when they begin formal schooling,these students expect to do well.i have been a nanny for more the 24 years and I know what am talking about,when you do interview ask the candidate if she's like to read,how is her social life,how she's spend her week and days,if she's take so long to respond don't hire her.
My advice,hire nannies from Brasil,they are modern and easy out going...

Wow you a great nanny!!!

[Anonymous]

You are overpaying for a below mediocre nanny.
Is preschool in the future as a 2 or 3 to? That could help with development. But that is expensive. For one child, in DC beltway, paying $18/hr or more you should be getting much more.

Also, FYI, we leave a monthly flyer for our nanny on child's developments, what to work on, new foods to try, age appropriate outings, etc.

[Anonymous]

So which is it, do you have a son or a daughter? You seem
a little confused.

[Anonymous]

She is far too good for you. Fire her because she deserves to work for someone worthy of the care and love she gives your child. You are an overeducated nimcompoop.

[Anonymous]

Tylenol instead of vitamins? When you say "uneducated" do you mean uneducated, foreign, doesn't-speak-much-english nanny?

[Anonymous]

if you're having too many "lost in translations" - either because nanny doesn't follow instructions well or understanding of English - then no, it's not a good fit.

we had a nanny like that in our former city - it was stressful and time-consuming.

[Anonymous]

Tylenol instead of vitamins isn't "uneducated," it's dangerous! What do you mean by "uneducated," OP? Do you actually mean she doesn't speak your language?

[Anonymous]

You are overpaying for a below mediocre nanny.
Is preschool in the future as a 2 or 3 to? That could help with development. But that is expensive. For one child, in DC beltway, paying $18/hr or more you should be getting much more.

This. It sounds like your nanny is not competent with the basics of being a nanny. That combined with her inability to figure out medication dosages, I'd be concerned about the safety of your child in her care.

[Anonymous]

I think what you are asking for are basic common sense issues.

The fact that your child was given medicine instead of vitamins is very problematic OP.

And that she has issues w/just basic reading + writing can be very dangerous in an emergency, God forbid.

Imagine if something happened in the home and she called 9-1-1 and could not understand basic instructions given due to language barriers, etc.

While she sounds like a wonderful and kind-hearted nanny, she is not a practical nanny for your child overall and your child's safety and welfare could be compromised because of it.

You need to let her go. If it makes you feel better, you can offer her a severance since she technically did nothing wrong on the job. You can also offer to give her a good recommendation/referral as well.