If the metro breaks down and you get home a few minutes past the ten hour mark - then what?

[Anonymous]

In the DC area, I'm sure we've all had times when we're all set to get somewhere on time, or even early, and then get stuck in a metro station for 20 minutes while the line gets working again. I'm normally home 10-15 minutes early, but once in a blue moon, end up < 10 minutes late after the ten hour mark, because of the metro - how do I make it up to the AP? Obviously, this should not be happening, at all. I know that, but in these two instances, I was already in the metro, getting out and taking a cab would have made me even more late, so I had to stay put at that point and just let AP know I was on my way. It's rare, but it's happened twice and I feel awful. It was less than 10 minutes each time. What can I do to make AP not feel taken advantage of? I don't want her to think that I don't respect her time. I could come up ten minutes early the following day, but she already gets off early all the other days anyway? Extra pay? A gift? Just make sure that the factors I do control, I'm responsible about? If there are any APs on here, what would you have wanted in this situation?

[Anonymous]

Don't feel awful. I am sure there are plenty of instances where you got home early or where did didn't have to work the full 45. Life happens.

Tell her how much you appreciate her and thank her for making it all work. If you want to, get her a small gift card or some cash -- I am sure she'd be really flattered and happy to know you care so much.

This is a great opportunity to show her how you feel!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't feel awful. I am sure there are plenty of instances where you got home early or where did didn't have to work the full 45. Life happens.

Tell her how much you appreciate her and thank her for making it all work. If you want to, get her a small gift card or some cash -- I am sure she'd be really flattered and happy to know you care so much.

This is a great opportunity to show her how you feel!

I'd add to this (PP here) to acknowledge that you don't want her to feel taken advantage of and that you understand the rules, etc.

[Anonymous]

If it happens literally a few times in a year max, it's only a few minutes, you text her as soon as it becomes apparent you will be late, and you apologize profusely, I wouldn't worry about it.

If it's happening once a week, then you need to leave work earlier.

[Anonymous]

Yep, I agree with the prior posters. These types of things happen to everyone. I'd think of it the same way you would an employee showing up late for work.

[Anonymous]

You're over thinking this. You respect schedules and only rarely err by an short unforseeable amount of time. she does the same.

[Anonymous]

How often does "metro break down"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How often does "metro break down"?

You're not in DC? Runs pretty well most of the year, has a few break downs at the height of summer and then occasionally one track will get backed up due to a sick passenger, a door malfunction, etc. I've been riding metro for several years and it's made me late made half a dozen times.

[Anonymous]

I'm guessing you don't ride the red line, PP.

[Anonymous]

I'm a host mom, but I think this is totally fine. We expect bumps and to be a little late once in a while. This probably happens to me ~once/month....traffic makes 4-10 minutes late. I text her, apologize, and it's fine. Ours usually do not work all 45 hours so I don't feel too bad about being 10 minutes late, just like I schedule her with a little wiggle room if she's a few minutes late or if we have something to talk about before we leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If it happens literally a few times in a year max, it's only a few minutes, you text her as soon as it becomes apparent you will be late, and you apologize profusely, I wouldn't worry about it.

If it's happening once a week, then you need to leave work earlier.

+1

And after apologizing profusely you say thank you. If you feel you were far too late (let's say 30 minutes instead of 5/10) or it happens for the second time that week you buy her a $10 Starbucks gift card on the weekend and give it to her as a little thank you. Or you let her leave half an hour early next Friday to compensate the extra time worked.
In an otherwise good and healthy au pair - host family relationship being 10 minutes late two times a year is not a huge issue (I am an ex au pair... I promise it's usually not a big deal), especially if you usually schedule to be home 10/15 minutes before her shift is over. A mature au pair that otherwise feels she is treated well and fairly (e.g. if she shows up 5 minutes late once because she was stuck in traffic you will suck it up as well) will not hold being late <10 minutes twice against you.

[Anonymous]

def, let her know as soon as you know that you are delayed, and thank her for her understanding. I try to repay, by letting her go early that week if possible. I leave work a bit early and that way she can leave early too.