Parents Not Doing Home Work When Nanny Isn't There?

[Anonymous]

I work for a great family who has a very sweet 8 year old girl. I have been working for them for a month and I am mostly happy.

However, I have noticed something that is frustrating me and Im not sure if I am just being picky or what. My charges teacher send home the homework for the week on monday. The homework then stays at the house until friday when it is all stapled together and turned in that day at school. The homework packet comes with a page outlining which pages she is supposed to do on each day. Each day usually has math and spelling and she is also supposed to do some work on her weekly project (book report, research project etc).

My charge HATES homework. It is alway a big fight. But she knows that the homework has to get done before we can do fun activities like paint, dance, play etc. Since this is our routine it always gets done because she knows I am not going to play with her if it isn't done.

Now, my issue is that I work 3 days a week and the two weekdays I am not there, she doesn't do homework. I come to work on Tuesday and look at her homework packet and see that mondays work did not get done. So now we have to do todays homework PLUS Mondays. Then I come in on Thursday and see that she did not do Wednesdays homework so now we have to do 2 days worth on one day AGAIN. I feel like the parents aren't making her do it because she puts up such a fight but it is unfair to her to have to do a double amount on her days with me. I also feel like it sets me up for a harder day since now she's mad she has so much homework to do and extra cranky. It is also not keeping her on the routine of doing homework before play time.

What should I do? Am I being silly?

[Anonymous]

Have you talked to the parents about this? If not, start there.

[Anonymous]

I've dealt with this and I just sucked it up and was the bad guy homework police. All the homework was done with me.

[Anonymous]

I think it's crummy the parents didn't talk to you about this directly, but I'm inclined to think that part of the reason they hired a babysitter in the first place was so she can be the one to enforce homework (and then they won't have to). I've seen things like this many times in my babysitting career. It stinks because not only does it mean twice as much homework on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but it also means more of a struggle to get her to do it in the first place (it's not part of her daily routine; "mommy and daddy don't make me do it, so why is my babysitter being so mean about it," which then rubs off on how she sees you, etc).

I agree that you should discuss with MB and DB. But be prepared for them to ne dismissive about it, and either make excuses/defending themselves or to just straight up tell you that they're expecting you to do it so they don't have to. I think it's also possible they will apologize and tell you they'll try to enforce homework more often, but again, be prepared for the fact that that might not actually happen.

I don't want to use the words "suck it up," but...I think it's just part of the territory of being a part time babysitter. You can quit and work with a different family where this might not be an issue, but really, having to help her with homework (even if she fights it and you have to do twice as much) isn't the worst thing you could be dealing with here.

Lastly, it sounds like you are also with her on Fridays when she has no homework. Perhaps you could make an agreement with her that if she either does her homework on Mondays and wednesdays when you're not there, or at least doesn't put up a fuss about doing it when you're there, then on Friday you guys could do something extra special (bake cookies, watch her favorite tv show, get ice cream cones, etc)?

[Anonymous]

No, you are not being silly OP.

My guess is that the parents hate dealing with the stress of having to deal with the tantrum of their daughter fussing over having to do her homework and choose to avoid it altogether instead by handing it over to you to do with her instead.

This is completely unfair to both you and her since it gives her double the amount of work on Tuesday and Thursday.

You need to discuss this with the parents and let them know that it would only be the right thing to do to allow their daughter to do her homework on the proper days since the days you are there it makes it too overwhelming for both you and her.

Hopefully they will see the error of their ways and start scheduling her assignments back to the correct days.

Good luck.