babysitter says i didn't pay her last year

[Anonymous]

i feel absolutely sick about this. she works at our daycare/preschool and watches our kids occasionally (like, once a month or less) and said that she did a 3 hour stretch sometime last year and grandparents picked up the kids at the end and didn't pay her and i never paid her... i actually remember this (vaguely) and left her money in an envelope with our front desk lady (it's a very small preschool, so the lady knew it was money, knew it was for the babysitter, knew how much was in envelope) and I never gave another thought to it. Obviously, it didn't make it to her (I don't care how or why - I'm going to imagine the envelope went into the trash by accident). Today, in response for a request for sitting tomorrow night, she sent me an email telling me that she wants the money up front - before she babysits because so many families forget to pay her and i apparently forgot last year. I am writing a check now, but feel quite horrible. Anything else I can do? I know the front desk lady won't remember at all - it was such a minor thing and so much crosses in her hands- including money. And it was cash.

I have sent a long email of apology, asked her to please contact me if this ever happens again - our children spend every day after school with grandparents, so with two households, there is plenty of room for errors of this kind.

[Anonymous]

Maybe if she does babysit for you again you had her an extra 20 and mention again how sorry you are and joke that the extra money is for interest owed ! Mistakes happen she could have contacted you after not being paid.

[Anonymous]

She should have contacted you the very next day about this. To just bring it up now seems like she's scamming money. If you want pay her for the last time again and pay her up front this time but definitely keep an eye on things going forward.

[Anonymous]

I don't think it sounds like she's scamming, I think she felt too awkward about it the first time around and now that you're asking her to work for you again she wants to be sure she'll get paid. totally legit. you should hand her the money from this point forward so you know she's actually getting paid

[Anonymous]

Scam. If this was true, she'd have contacted you before now. Run away from her.

[Anonymous]

I would use a babysitter that was a little more mature, someone who would contact me right away if her pay didn't make it to her instead of brooding over it for months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would use a babysitter that was a little more mature, someone who would contact me right away if her pay didn't make it to her instead of brooding over it for months.

This is no ones fault but OPs. Most of you probably have no experience having to go to your boss because they forgot to pay you. Nannies and sitters are under so much pressure to pretend that we work out the goodness of our kid-loving hearts, that talking about the money in any aspect is extremely awkward. Pay her up front, apologize, and move on. But do not pretend for one second that this is remotely her fault.

[Anonymous]

Apologize for the misunderstanding and give the money to her directly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would use a babysitter that was a little more mature, someone who would contact me right away if her pay didn't make it to her instead of brooding over it for months.

This is no ones fault but OPs. Most of you probably have no experience having to go to your boss because they forgot to pay you. Nannies and sitters are under so much pressure to pretend that we work out the goodness of our kid-loving hearts, that talking about the money in any aspect is extremely awkward. Pay her up front, apologize, and move on. But do not pretend for one second that this is remotely her fault.

Somewhat disagree. Sure the OPs plan could have been more organized, but this sitter needs to learn to speak up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
i feel absolutely sick about this. she works at our daycare/preschool and watches our kids occasionally (like, once a month or less) and said that she did a 3 hour stretch sometime last year and grandparents picked up the kids at the end and didn't pay her and i never paid her... i actually remember this (vaguely) and left her money in an envelope with our front desk lady (it's a very small preschool, so the lady knew it was money, knew it was for the babysitter, knew how much was in envelope) and I never gave another thought to it. Obviously, it didn't make it to her (I don't care how or why - I'm going to imagine the envelope went into the trash by accident). Today, in response for a request for sitting tomorrow night, she sent me an email telling me that she wants the money up front - before she babysits because so many families forget to pay her and i apparently forgot last year. I am writing a check now, but feel quite horrible. Anything else I can do? I know the front desk lady won't remember at all - it was such a minor thing and so much crosses in her hands- including money. And it was cash.

I have sent a long email of apology, asked her to please contact me if this ever happens again - our children spend every day after school with grandparents, so with two households, there is plenty of room for errors of this kind.

You solved your problem just fine. Done.

[Anonymous]

I'd be sure to let her know what happened, apologize, pay her cash from last time and this time and call it a day. I've had parents forget to pay me, and sometimes I bring it up, sometimes I don't. Depends on how often they call me and/or refer me to their friends. The more work I get from them, the more likely I am to forgive an oversight.

[Anonymous]

Pp here, also be sure to tell her to let you know if something like this happens again.