We are interviewing and found a nanny we love who has great references. We did a trial day and shadowed me for the day. At lunch time she had to take medication I asked her if she was sick and she said no, due to complications after a surgery she has chronic pain and takes prescription pain meds 2 times a day. She's been on them for 7 years and she doesn't get the side effects like drowsiness/impairment that people get when they take them for acute pain. She offered to provide a letter from her doctor stating that the medication has been used long enough that it doesn't cause the side effects. According to her references she only missed a max of 6 days of work total during employment with them (she was at the ft jobs 3 years, 4 years, and then a few pt jobs all were at least 2 years of employment) the days she did call out sick the families said were when the kids passed something along to her or the entire family was sick and they told her to stay home. During the interviews and job shadowing we would not have known she was on anything had we not seen her take it. I was thinking of calling her references and asking them if they knew she was on this medication and if they ever noticed any impairment. My DH said that would be an invasion of privacy and if they would have thought anything was wrong or suspected being under the influence they would have let her go, or informed us. He wants to hire her as she is the most qualified and we really clicked with her.
Just seeing what others would do in this situation. Please don't flmae me since I'm not experienced with these medications besides taking them after delivery and they knocked me out and I felt drugged up |
I wouldn't hire her. Bc eventually these pain killers will not be enough and she'll up the dosage. |
I can see why this would make you uneasy. I think if she is willing to get a letter from her doctor that is encouraging.
Here is what would reassure me from a physician: - is he/she the prescribing physician for this medication for the entire time she has been on it? - can physician assure you that the medication is being taken as prescribed, in a way that is supervised and tracked over time? - is there anything about her physical condition (whatever is causing the chronic pain) and her medication usage that in any way makes her unable to perform the basic requirements of the job, which include: supervising small children alone for extended periods of time, driving small children regularly in her car, having to potentially react quickly (child falls, darts into traffic) or in an emergency situation (child has allergic reaction, brreaks a bone, etc...) It is true that use of painkillers for chronic conditions is quite different that use of painkillers for getting high or by someone who is struggling with addiction. Someone who is using medication appropriately does not have escalating need, should not have serious side effects, and can be on maintenance medication for decades. (I know this from experience with a parent with chronic medical conditions.) I think it's worth some additional due diligence OP, but I also think the way the nanny was very upfront about it, and not hiding anything, is positive. |
Yes it's true that the dosage on these medications may be needed a short acting may be added in. To say she will up the dose is unfair to the nanny. Addicts up their own doseage, chronic pain patients go through their doctor. If the doseage is increased the side effects only last two-three days while the body adjusts. The increase is gradual to minimize effects. Also if she's taking it 2 times a day it's most likely a time controlled medication which the patient can't easily add more on because it will cause an overdose. I agree with getting the letter from her doctor and going by her references and give her a chance if her doctor ok'd it and her condition won't effect her job and you liked her before you knew. I think her being honest was outstanding and says a lot about her character. It also doesn't sound like she abuses them otherwise she would have called out sick more than she did in previous jobs |
You kind of overstepped by even asking her about the medication, and she did not have to provide an answer. I would be happy she was honest with you, and she seems responsible about it. If you must, ask for a letter from her provider, but I don't think you should, or legal could, make a hiring decision based on this information. |
She has good references and long term jobs gong back at least ten years, it sounds like she's functioning just fine! I would hire her for sure. |
I don;t take so much as tylenol in front of my employer!!! Honestly, I have no idea why the nanny would do that in front of you.
Anyway, yes it would make me uneasy. Deal breaker? Probably. |
I'm definitely biased because I'm a nanny with chronic pain who takes pain killers 3 times per day. But I also feel like that gives me real experience in this area. If she took the medicine in front of you she clearly isn't trying to hide it and if she was an addict she would definitely be hiding it. My bosses know I take my pain medication 3 times daily and are fine with it because they see how I am daily. I however wasn't as up front about it as this nanny in the beginning. It took me about a month to finally tell the parents and I did so by taking my pill in front of them. My guess is this was her way of bringing it up as well. If you have doubts ask for the doctors note and hopefully that will set your mind at ease. |
I have to take medication for my BP twice a day. Should I delay this because my employer is in the same space as me? I must be a drug addict... |
Nope, but you could easily go to the bathroom and take your medication there. |
+1 I will never understand why nannies feel the need to share every detail of their lives with their employer! Take any medication/OTC pills in the bathroom. |
Op here. Thanks for all the advice. Maybe I was wrong to ask and she grabbed a travel pill case out of her bag which was down the hall I happened to see her grab it. It wasn't like it was laying out in a common area.
To the poster asking why nannies share so much. I like that she was honest and willing to explain to me she didn't go on and on just gave me the basics. DH and I are going to hire her. We will not ask for a letter from her doctor. If we notice anything that is cause for concern we will address it at that time |
Totally agree it's like an attention type of thing. These nannies need to learn to stop over sharing. Taking a pill in front of your boss is unexceptable even if its a Tylenol. Go into the bathroom. |
All you need is someone dealing prescription drugs out of your house and the cops can seize it. Not worth it. Find a new nanny with less addictions |
my mil is an addict - all prescribed but by different doctors. she takes zanax, abilify and several other sleep meds she abuses and mixes with alcohol.
she truly believes she needs all of them. she happily takes some of them in front of us. she doesn't know I know about the "extras" just bc she took it in front of you doesn't mean she takes more or abuses them. btw my MIL is an employed nurse. she believes she is not an addict and often flaunts what she takes - some of it as normal. I don't know if I wouldn't hire her, but just bc she disclosed doesn't mean there is a bigger problem... |