Change in schedule

[Anonymous]

Not really sure what to title this.

About a month ago, my MB and I discussed me going part time. Well two days a week but 15 hrs each day. I agreed it was ok and actually got another part time job on the 3 other days right away.

Now after two weeks of this new schedule I guess it's not working out for MB A (the one with 2 long days). She needs more help on 1 sometimes 2 mornings. So she hired a college student for those mornings. I found out today that she comes when I'm not there.

I know MB A isn't trying to replace me and I know she was respecting that I have this other nanny family on the opposite days. But it still kinda hurt when I found out. I have been with this family for 2yrs. MB A says it's just til she figures out her new schedule and all. I'm glad she found someone, but still makes me sad.

[Anonymous]

If she had asked you, would you have been available? It doesn't sound like it, because you found a second job that's a great fit.

[Anonymous]

She knew you weren't available. That's all this is. Be glad that she respected the fact that she had no claim on your time. She could have said she needed you on those other days and expected you to drop everything. She is respectful and realistic. Don't go looking for problems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She knew you weren't available. That's all this is. Be glad that she respected the fact that she had no claim on your time. She could have said she needed you on those other days and expected you to drop everything. She is respectful and realistic. Don't go looking for problems.

+1

She did the right thing by you, be glad to have a considerate and respectful employer who appreciates your need to be able to make commitments to other families as well as hers.

[Anonymous]

OP is 100% right to be disappointed with the mother's behavior and lack of respect. After two years together, you'd think they'd be on the same team. Such an important decision should have been first discussed. The fact that it hadn't been mentioned, is a red flag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP is 100% right to be disappointed with the mother's behavior and lack of respect. After two years together, you'd think they'd be on the same team. Such an important decision should have been first discussed. The fact that it hadn't been mentioned, is a red flag.

What are you even talking about? So if the mother needs childcare every Sunday and knows her nanny only works M-F she should discuss with the nanny her plans for that time? Should nanny decide who she hires, too? SAME SITUATION HERE. You are crazy.

I work Mon, Tue, Thur, and Fri for my NF. I have another job on Wed. My MB does not tell me when she needs Wed coverage, she just hires a temp...because she knows I am busy. THAT is respect.

[Anonymous]

Thanks all

I am totally thankful my MB found someone who could help her a few mornings a week. I'm also understanding that she respected my new NF. It all did work out but it still hurts a little. For the reason I was with the kids for so long and now they also have someone else. It was rough for the first two times from what I heard. Now today the kids were telling me all the fun things they do with this new nanny. I love that they are ok, I want them to be.

Thanks again

[Anonymous]

I would feel hurt too and kind of jealous, I do admit.

Would you have taken the hours if she would have offered them to you again?
If not, then it is what it is.

I am sure they still love you to death and I wouldn't worry too much.

Sure, it feels like you have competition now, but that only means that you will have to be on your toes and at your best at all times! <---- Not saying that you weren't before.

[Anonymous]

Nanny thought she was part of a team. MB doesn't think so, apparently. It makes a huge difference. That's all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nanny thought she was part of a team. MB doesn't think so, apparently. It makes a huge difference. That's all.

How many threads have we seen where a nanny complains because her MB asked her to work on a day she doesn't normally work? A lot of people immediately jump to the conclusion that the MB is awful and doesn't respect the nanny's time at all. You can't have it both ways and not every MB that doesn't do EXACTLY what you want is bad.

OP, I understand why you would feel the way you do but you really can't blame your MB for trying to be respectful of your time. I'm sure it's hard when you've been the children's only caregiver, other than parents, for a long time and now they have someone else as well. But unless your MB knew you weren't happy with your second NF and looking to add more hours with her instead, you really can't be upset with her.

[Anonymous]

At lease I would make a comment, just to be respectful