Nanny Wages

[Anonymous]

I am in need of advice in regards to nanny wages. Our nanny started working with us when DC1 was 5 months. She asked me for a certain wage which I accepted without doing much research. We paid her $18 per hour plus all the fed holidays paid and plus 3 weeks paid PTO. We always pay for 50 hours including vacation weeks. This comes out to a lot in the end of the year. We pay on the books. I realized later it was a bit on a high end. When the DC2 came a long I did not raise her by much thinking she is already making the market. However, I did give her higher than average bonuses. Just gave her 2K for Christmas. I can definitely feel that she is unhappy and some resentment is showing on her end. I also happen to know she was looking for a job but could not find anything. Her English is not very good and she is not computer savvy.

What I am wondering is what to do now. I can raise her making my total bill a lot. Part of me does not want to do it because she was trying to do as little as possible recently and so it will feel as reward for undesirable behavior. I can part ways with her and will give her a nice lump sum before parting. I do not feel good about it either because I know finding a job for her would be hard and she is in a difficult financial situation. The current situation can not continue either as it is to no one's satisfaction. Any advice on how to handle this situation would be greatly appreciated

[Anonymous]

You need to have a heart-to-heart talk with her, and sincerely ask her what she wants. You say she can't get another job. So it seems she should be thrilled with your job. Find out why she isn't.

Also, you should look around to, realizing that the grass is usually greener on the other side of the fence.

[Anonymous]

We were in a similar situation. We loved our nanny and paid her well, fed holidays off, she was paid when we went on holiday and she received 2 weeks paid vacation.

Needless to say, I could tell there was some resentment. Nothing ever seemed good enough. I always felt like I was just trying to please her. It got very uncomfortable.

Here's the problem, we both hired nannies before really understanding all of the details. I have only myself to blame for not putting everything in black and white and being very upfront about future salary.

Ultimately we parted ways-- on good terms. While we miss her terribly, it was a much needed break. We appreciate her more and I think she feels the same. We still see her and love her. She still babysits on occasion.

Long story short, if it's in the best interest of both parties, start over. You can help her find a good paying job on DCUM. It's an uncomfortable topic but if you can sit down and talk it through, you will most likely have your answer.

Good luck and remember, it's a learning process.

[Anonymous]

Does your child need a switch?
That should be the primary question.

[Anonymous]

While it's great that you are concerned for her, she's been taking advantage of you and not doing her job.

Your options are to sit down with her, explaining to her that you're already paying her on the high end and gave her a large bonus, so she really needs to step up her game and start doing her duties.

Or let her go.

Don't reward her poor behavior. If her finances are that tight and she has limited options, she should be working hard to ensure you want her around! She has an excellent job setup with you -- she shouldn't throw that away.