New live in nanny

[Anonymous]

I'm a live in for the first time after two years of regular nannying and would like some advice . My NF provides a car as stated in our contract but this is only after I ask to take it and tell the dad how long I will be gone sometimes he even asks me where I am going. It drives me nuts! I'm an adult. Is this normal? I know this is both of our first times in this situation so I get the hesitance. Secondly there is one television in the house located in the living room that I can only watch when their kids aren't or the mom isn't watching you've hunters. Is it weird for me to but a tv for my personal space ? I would still have to talk to them about their cable plan?

[Anonymous]

The car thing isn't weird if it's a family car that everyone uses rather than your own personal car. They probably like to get an idea of when you're returning incase they need to use it. If the car is only for your use than they have control issues. I don't think it's weird to have your own tv and most updated modern homes have the cable hookup throughout the house. You should just be able to connect a wire to the back of the tv. The only thing you wouldn't be able to do is watch movies on demand without a box.

[Anonymous]

They're not obligated to provide cable. It sucks that they don't, but they're definitely not obligated to.
Do they have wifi? You can use Hulu on your computer in your room or buy your own small smart TV.

The car thing is annoying but that's their rules. When you live in someone else's house, you have to abide by their rules. (I don't know why anyone would want to be a live in)

Think of it this way: you're not really being provided a free car, it's to use on the job. I'm sure if you needed to go to a doctors app or something he would let you use it though.

[Anonymous]

Of course, all this should have been clarified up front. Now is the time to politely sit down and say you realize there were something things that weren't clear in the beginning and would it be alright to sit down and set out a contract covering house rules and expectations as well as compensation package.

The car - if it's a car you will all share, it would be completely normal that you would need to ask and/or "reserve" it with them ahead of time. He probably wants to know where you are going just so he knows where his car is. It is expensive and stressful to have someone you don't know driving your car, so acknowledgement of that (rather than implying that he's prying) would probably go a long way. If it's just your car, certainly ask him if there are rules for when/if you can take it out and where you can go.

As to the TV - there is no "normal" and it really doesn't matter. What matters is what works for you for your living space. Are you in a private room close the family or a private suite away from them? Do you furnish/decorate your own space or is it pretty set up? If you would like a TV, feel free to ask if they have a cable hook up in your space.

[Anonymous]

It's not clear from your post - are they providing a car so that you can drive the kids around? Or just as a perk?

[Anonymous]

These are things you should have worked out before moving in. Because did you really think you'd be able to take their car on Saturday morning at 10 a.m. and not return it until 10 p.m.?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These are things you should have worked out before moving in. Because did you really think you'd be able to take their car on Saturday morning at 10 a.m. and not return it until 10 p.m.?

When did she say that is what she wanted to do? I understand them asking when you'd be back if you're sharing a car, but asking where you're going is too much. It doesn't sound like you and this family are a great fit (or that they are really prepared to have a live in).

[Anonymous]

OP here not sure where the ten to ten is coming from . But I appreciate the feedback! Living in has been an adjustment lol but I'll let the car issue go and buy a tv

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here not sure where the ten to ten is coming from . But I appreciate the feedback! Living in has been an adjustment lol but I'll let the car issue go and buy a tv

Depending on who they use for cable, adding another box will increase their bill. I hope (sincerely) that they're willing to pay for that for you.

[Anonymous]

Honestly OP, you don't really need cable. Buy a tvand a blueray player that streams netflix, hulu, pandora etc etc and call it a day.

[Anonymous]

Wow...Only ONE T.V in the whole house??! Is it like the 70's??? Lol.

If you have your own room, I would ask to get my own T.V. set in there and hopefully get cable as well.

As for the car, if they are paying for it as well as your gas/insurance, etc. then I guess they can ask you whatever they want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly OP, you don't really need cable. Buy a tvand a blueray player that streams netflix, hulu, pandora etc etc and call it a day.

My live-in situation doesn't include cable because they only have an antenna upstairs (they hardly ever watch real tv) and they use netflix mostly for the kids. I have my own tv (previously owned by me) and an antenna as well, plus my own Tivo (bought by myself). I watch stuff on Hulu (connect my computer to my TV with an HDMI cable) and asked for access to their Netflix account prior to moving in. I really don't need cable and it doesn't cost them anything extra per month.