About to be a first time Live-in(advice?)

[Anonymous]

I am moving to Orange County, CA to be a live-in nanny. I am 20 years old
I lived there before and my best friends are all there so I wont be new to the area and I will have support.
Saving up for college!

The family actually wants a mothers helper more than a nanny. The mom is a stay at home mom and is limited due to back problems.
Her ad said she needs help mostly with the older kids and not so much the newborn. (3 kids. 6,2 and 3 months)
She also said she needs help with household work such as dishes and laundry which I don't mind. I mean how much can there be to do in one day?
I get around $300-$350 a week. Private room/bathroom. Big house in a gated community by the beach.

Does the pay sound right to you experienced live-ins? I'm assuming, and I will make sure before I move, that I will get weekends off and it wont be crazy since
mom will be home with me.
They seem like a great family. I just don't want to be getting ripped off.

Any tips and advice on ANYTHING would be appreciated!!!Thanks!

[Anonymous]

You will certainly be helping with the baby.

[Anonymous]

How many hours are you expected to work?

If it's full-time, I wouldn't do it for less then $500/week.

[Anonymous]

Don't do it!!!!

[Anonymous]

You need to get a contract first. Or be prepared to move in with your friends.

[Anonymous]

This is OP!

Why shouldn't I? There are no explanations..

[Anonymous]

Do you have any kind of written agreement? Where did you find them?

[Anonymous]

OP, I think you sound like a very young and inexperienced girl and I sincerely want to save you any hardships later down the line so I will do my best to advise you accordingly. By the way, I also live in Southern CA, San Diego..which is about 1.5 hrs. South from the O.C.

Anyway, the reason someone stated "Don't do it!" is because there are some red flags already. For instance, working alongside a parent in the home is a recipe for disaster. Sure, there are always exceptions to the rule, but in most cases, these are very dicey situations. Mark my words. The parent in the home is always hovering over the nanny and the nanny always feel as if she is being watched and judged which she usually is. Also, the parent usually micromanages the nanny which usually drives the nanny crazy mad.

Even though this family is telling you you most likely won't be caring for the infant, trust me on this OP...most of your childcare duties will be for the baby. The mother is trying to make this job offer seem like a breeze since she is not offering very much on the payscale..esp. for Orange County standards. Also, she is telling you you won't be doing much in the housekeeping area, but before you know it, you will be on your hands and knees, scrubbing floors and toilets in no time!!!!

The whole job sounds like a scam to me. The pay is low and in order to justify such low pay the mother is making this job sound like it is going to be easy peasy. Oh sure...you won't be in charge of the baby very much...or the hard stuff around the house, etc. Yeah right.

You can take the job and take your chances...or take our advice and run for the hills.

If you do decide on this job, please OP, make sure you either agree on a trial period of up to six weeks first before you sign a contract and/or have a back-up living plan in case things go wrong.

I wish you only the best.
Keep us posted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you sound like a very young and inexperienced girl and I sincerely want to save you any hardships later down the line so I will do my best to advise you accordingly. By the way, I also live in Southern CA, San Diego..which is about 1.5 hrs. South from the O.C.

Anyway, the reason someone stated "Don't do it!" is because there are some red flags already. For instance, working alongside a parent in the home is a recipe for disaster. Sure, there are always exceptions to the rule, but in most cases, these are very dicey situations. Mark my words. The parent in the home is always hovering over the nanny and the nanny always feel as if she is being watched and judged which she usually is. Also, the parent usually micromanages the nanny which usually drives the nanny crazy mad.

Even though this family is telling you you most likely won't be caring for the infant, trust me on this OP...most of your childcare duties will be for the baby. The mother is trying to make this job offer seem like a breeze since she is not offering very much on the payscale..esp. for Orange County standards. Also, she is telling you you won't be doing much in the housekeeping area, but before you know it, you will be on your hands and knees, scrubbing floors and toilets in no time!!!!

The whole job sounds like a scam to me. The pay is low and in order to justify such low pay the mother is making this job sound like it is going to be easy peasy. Oh sure...you won't be in charge of the baby very much...or the hard stuff around the house, etc. Yeah right.

You can take the job and take your chances...or take our advice and run for the hills.

If you do decide on this job, please OP, make sure you either agree on a trial period of up to six weeks first before you sign a contract and/or have a back-up living plan in case things go wrong.

I wish you only the best.
Keep us posted.

Excellent advice!

[Anonymous]

And you won't see your friends as often as you think. Unless the family is out of town, making plans is always a crap shoot when you are a live in.

[Anonymous]

OP: Another huge red flag I see in your post is that this mother is using the term "Mother's Helper" as opposed to "Nanny." People use this term to justify why they are offering a lower pay rate. They want to act like the job is not as much work as a Nanny job..In a sense, they are tricking you into thinking this job is simply assisting the mother on a day to day basis with simply and light duties, etc. She is saying you really won't be caring much for the 3 mos. old, that the infant care will primarily be on her. That most of the heavier day to day household chores will also fall to her as well. The reason she is stating all of this is because she doesn't want to tell you it all upfront since she is offering you such low pay for Southern CA. Then once she has you moved in, settled into the job, attached to the kids, etc. she will have you so strung out and you will be stuck with no place to go.

I say err on the side of caution and do not take this job at all.

If you MUST, then agree on a trial period first before signing anything and make sure you have a back-up living plan in place so you won't be stuck living there.

[Anonymous]