Interesting Nanny Issue

[Anonymous]

Our nanny of three months let our DC (8 years old) ride in the front seat of her car, and the ill-behaved child broke her windshield with a kick while throwing a tantrum. I was mortified, and of course immediately grounded DC from their favorite extracurricular sport for the next three months, as well as giving them a good spanking in front of the nanny. S/he also apologized to the nanny.

I arranged for the nanny's 1999 vehicle to have the windshield replaced the very next day at one of the nation's premier auto glass outfitters, and paid the $300 to have the work done. Less than an hour after the windshield was repaired, the nanny returned to me and said that her spouse was unhappy with the repair because after-market glass was used instead of dealer/auto manufacturer glass (I was not aware of the difference). Nanny said that a repair with the original manufacturer's glass would cost $1,200 (she must have had this information before the repair was undertaken), and that her spouse had gotten an estimate for that work. I told her that I wished that she had approached me with her concern before the work was completed, so that I could have made the repair to her satisfaction to begin with.

After verifying with the dealership that the cost of using original market glass was indeed about $ 1,200, I wrote the nanny a check in that amount. I also let the nanny go, because I had lost a bit of trust in her. I felt that her coming to me for money after the repair was completed to complain was somewhat of a play for more money. Also, my children are now older (DC is the youngest), and I had been thinking for a while now that I can handle the driving and childcare/house without help.

The nanny called yesterday to offer her apologies, and the return of half the $1,200 if she could return to work for our family. I am inclined to stick to my original decision to care for my children myself. Any advice?

[Anonymous]

I'd stick with your decision. If you've lost trust in her, you shouldn't hire her back.

[Anonymous]

Your child was kicking and broke a windshield?
This isn't even a good troll post. It's boring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your child was kicking and broke a windshield?
This isn't even a good troll post. It's boring.

OP here. I found it mortifying, actually.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your child was kicking and broke a windshield?
This isn't even a good troll post. It's boring.

Also, I wanted to know if I had handled things appropriately.

[Anonymous]

These types of potential problems are what led us to get a dedicated nanny car that we could upkeep to our specifications and maintain adequate insurance on. That said, if you want to manage without a nanny, now would be a good time to make that transition before the children get too attached. You made the nanny "whole" by giving her the $300 and she has learned to make her requirements know upfront before allowing repairs to be made to her property. Nothing more needs to be done unless you really like her and want to keep her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These types of potential problems are what led us to get a dedicated nanny car that we could upkeep to our specifications and maintain adequate insurance on. That said, if you want to manage without a nanny, now would be a good time to make that transition before the children get too attached. You made the nanny "whole" by giving her the $300 and she has learned to make her requirements know upfront before allowing repairs to be made to her property. Nothing more needs to be done unless you really like her and want to keep her.

Correction, I meant $1200, not $300.

[Anonymous]

I would let her go. No hold under 12 should be riding in the front to begin with. Bad judgement on her. So for you to fix her own mistake, was nice of you. But I would not welcome her anymore. I would have done the same thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would let her go. No hold under 12 should be riding in the front to begin with. Bad judgement on her. So for you to fix her own mistake, was nice of you. But I would not welcome her anymore. I would have done the same thing.

MB here. It might have been her mistake but OP's child damaged her property. OP was right to fix the windshield. If the nanny wanted her job back, she should have shown good faith and returned all the $1200, since obviously, her DH wasn't going to use it to replace the windshield with manufacturer's glass after all.

[Anonymous]

Honestly I'm not trying to be mean but if your child gets that angry that he/she breaks a windshield I would save money and invest in therapy for your child. That is crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly I'm not trying to be mean but if your child gets that angry that he/she breaks a windshield I would save money and invest in therapy for your child. That is crazy.

OP here. Believe me, DC is being dealt with here as well. I believe I was right to pay the $1,200 + $300 repair though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly I'm not trying to be mean but if your child gets that angry that he/she breaks a windshield I would save money and invest in therapy for your child. That is crazy.

Some kids are just more physical. My brother, who turned out to be the most gifted socially as an adult, was a kicker and screamer as a child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly I'm not trying to be mean but if your child gets that angry that he/she breaks a windshield I would save money and invest in therapy for your child. That is crazy.

Some kids are just more physical. My brother, who turned out to be the most gifted socially as an adult, was a kicker and screamer as a child.

Thanks for the insight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would let her go. No hold under 12 should be riding in the front to begin with. Bad judgement on her. So for you to fix her own mistake, was nice of you. But I would not welcome her anymore. I would have done the same thing.

MB here. It might have been her mistake but OP's child damaged her property. OP was right to fix the windshield. If the nanny wanted her job back, she should have shown good faith and returned all the $1200, since obviously, her DH wasn't going to use it to replace the windshield with manufacturer's glass after all.

well that's why she deserved to be fired. Don't give her a second chance OP!

[Anonymous]

When Parents can do their own parenting, that's usually the best possible thing for most families. It gives children the stability that so many are lacking.