Other costs of having an AP (car etc)

[Anonymous]

I am very interested in having an AP, for a few reasons. We have sort of odd schedules in that we don't need much childcare, but we do need it. I am in education and love working with young people, and I think it would be fun to have an au pair in the home. We also are very internationally minded as my husband has dual citizenship with another country and speaks the other language fluently, etc. We also have tons of space- so all in all I think it would work out well.

My only concern is about other expenses that could add up. We would not be able to afford to get a separate car for the AP. Would this be a problem? We are 2.4 miles from a metro, and are .4 miles from a bus that goes right to the metro. Will that give her enough transportation options? We are also a very short walk to parks, shopping centers, a movie theater and our community gym/pool. But, I would personally not want to live there without a car so I'd worry about her happiness. We would also not be able to provide her with a smartphone and data plan (we could get her a cheapo cell phone w/no data if necessary). Not sure what other expenses would pop up...

Does this mean we should steer clear of getting an AP? I guess the car is the iggest issue for me.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you are close enough to public transportation and to some things that you don't need another car. We've had 4 au pairs and no 3rd car for any of them. We are 3 blocks to the bus and then a 15 min ride to metro. We are, however, generous with the use of one of our cars. When she needs a car and we don't have one to share, then au pairs are good at getting rides with friends with cars. You will need to make a car available to her to get to and from her classes. You will need to pay a certain amount toward her classes (about $500) and possibly pay for her transportation to your home from her orientation site (for us, that was about $120). We provide our au pairs with a basic prepaid phone that has unlimited calls, data and text for $50/mo but there is no minimum requirement. . You will need to add her to your insurance plan so that she can drive your car, and the cost for that varies depending on your insurance, her current license (I think German au pairs are cheaper to insure) and her age. Increased food costs can be a big unknown, depending on what your au pair eats, so talk about that a bit before matching. Most of our au pairs have been very simple eaters and just ate what we put out, but we had one who had a taste for fresh fruits and vegetable AND snacks. We had to buy twice the amount of produce we normally would and snacks just flew out of the house. A case of soda that would last us a month barely lasted a week when she was here. We have found that the biggest unexpected expense was how much it cost to include her in our family outings and activities, such as going to the fair and out to dinner. We completely underestimated how much she would want to do with us and how much it would cost.

[Anonymous]

Until a recent move, we were about the same distance as you from metro and ride-on bus. While it's true that your AP could take these to another major point such as downtown, the issue is that many of her friends won't live in metro-accessible locations. So it will be hard for her to have a social life without a car shared at least some of the time.

When we lived in the similar location as you, we shared two cars between DH, AP, and me. DH rode his bike to work, so AP and I each had a car during weekdays. On weekends, we needed both cars for the children on Sat mornings, but AP was usually sleeping then anyway. On Sat afternoons, nights, and Sundays, we worked it out so that AP had a car at least much if not most of the time.

Car insurance varies widely. We have a German AP who is 19, and the cost of adding her to the policy for one car was $2800. We are not in MD anymore, so it's possible it might be less if we were, but this is a significant cost to take into account.

For food, our current AP is not a big eater and costs maybe $25 additional per week, mainly in extra milk, fruit, cereal, and juice. Last year's AP was an enormous eater (skinny as a rail, very athletic), and she ate a small fortune weekly. Her grocery bill - all for healthy foods, nothing processed and few snacks - was closer to $75 on top of our weekly bill. That said, we ADORED her (as we do the current AP) so although we joked with her about her appetite, and DH and I would sometimes roll our eyes at the size of her sandwiches and the ingredients in her smoothies, drunk to wash down her enormous sandwiches, we never begrudged her anything and considered it part and parcel of the cost of hosting an AP.

We have a basic cellphone that is connected to our plan, for which we pay 1500 free minutes and unlimited texting for the AP. No smart phone and no data plan. Additional expenses are cost of having a third adult on vacations and going out to dinner, cost of having your electricity running all day long while AP is home (we were surprised how much this added), cost of incidentals. Benefits for us way outweigh the costs, especially for the flexibility/split schedule possibilities and the sheer joy of having a great AP be part of our family.

[Anonymous]

We have been doing the au pair program for several years now, and I find that it runs us about $24K per year. We do provide a car (but she pays for her gas), we do not provide a cell phone. The rest of the costs are hidden in additional activities she joins our family for (dinner out, vacations, etc.).

You are smart to be thinking about the transportation issue. It is my firm belief that in order to be happy, au pairs NEED a way to get out and socialize with their friends. If it is too hard (or time consuming) it will really limit their ability to get out of the house. This doesn't necessarily mean a car, but it depends on several things: 1) your access to nearby fun stuff (movies/mall) via public transportation; 2) what country she is from; and 3) how many other au pairs are in your immediate area.

For example, if you live in Georgetown, I would not worry AT ALL about not having a car. If you live where I do (Vienna, in the suburbs) it would be problematic. If you choose an au pair from Germany or Brazil (very popular au pair countries), and are in a large cluster, it is also possible that her friends will have a car and can pick her up. If you choose an au pair from, say, China (far less common), or live in a geographically large cluster, it may be harder for her to get a ride.

[Anonymous]

We are in Bethesda and are 10 mins walk to bus and then 10 min ride to downtown Bethesda. AP will be German and we don't have an extra car, but happy to share whenever possible. Is this ok?

[Anonymous]

23:23 again. As long as you take into account that the AP may not be able to get easily from Bethesda TO wherever she wants to go (another AP's house, Montgomery Mall, the YMCA on Old Gtown, just to name places our AP frequented), and you make sure she has access to a car when she wants to go to one of the places that are hard to get to by bus or metro, then you're OK. We purposely picked a younger AP who was used to sharing a car at home, rather than an AP who had her own dedicated car at home, because we wanted someone who would be comfortable sharing. Just be really, really clear in matching that the AP won't have a dedicated car but that you'll do whatever you can within reason to make things work, and you should be OK. I can't remember a single time that we had friction with our AP over sharing a car.

[Anonymous]

I am a HM and unless you share a car with her, she will be unhappy.

Other costs include

Food
Added utility costs
Entrance fees to activities and added costs of AP while taking care of your kids at those activities.
Gas
Cell phone
Insurance
Education requirement
Travel costs while you take her on vacation with you.
Travel costs to bring her here from orientation
Gifts for xmas, birthdays, etc.
Any bonuses or extraneous gifts you give her

Basically a third child.

[Anonymous]

Food can be a huge cost.

[Anonymous]

OP: Do you have 1 or 2 cars?

We live in a similar location (1.5 mile walk to metro, or 5 minute walk to bus stop & 5 min. ride to metro). We're on our 2nd AP and have never had any problems with sharing the cars. It is very rare that AP wants a car and it's not possible - and when that happens, she's always found an alternative mode of transportation.

Until our 1st AP, we only had one car. Kids were younger then too. It was OK with 1 car pre-AP because DH & I commute to work by metro. However, I think we'd have a lot of tension re sharing if we didn't have a 2nd car now.

[Anonymous]

New poster here. On our 2nd au pair (first from Poland, current from Brazil). We are 1-2 blocks from bus, about 10 minute ride to the metro. Ours have not had access to the cars, and it has not been a problem. I think if you live in the suburbs without access to public transportation, you would need to offer this.

With our next one, we will need to figure this out b/c our DS will be going to preschool. Our plan now is to share our 2 current cars (DH and I both work closeby and DH travels often). I'm not worried about the logistics during the work week. I am worried about the weekend "Can I take the car to do X" stuff.


Many of APs friends have access to cars, but not necessarily their own.

[Anonymous]

I'm another host mom. We've had two au pairs and have shared our one family car between me, my husband and our au pair. We live right by the Metro and DH and I take the Metro to work or on dates. We only really use the car for Target runs or to take the kids to classes or something. We've never had an issue with sharing the car. I don't know a single AP who has a car exclusively for her (obviously not that it doesn't happen, but I think it's completely the norm to have to share).

[Anonymous]

Does anyone here not share a car with their au pairs? I'm surprised at the number of people who do. We had two au pairs growing up, lived 2 miles from the closest bus, and never shared cars with them.

[Anonymous]

We don't. Not worth the liability for us.