Tips for au pair selection?

[Anonymous]

I'd love to share tips for selecting au pairs. We're on our second and so far it seems like I've picked well for both (we loved our first one, just getting to know our second). Of course, two times doesn't mean anything more than coincidence, so I'd love to hear about how others select. Here's what I look for.

First, I only look at au pairs who have worked with kids in a setting involving more than just ocassional evening babysitting. I only look at APs who have spent longer times with the same kids over a long period of time. Kids can be easy and fun for a few hours once a month, but an AP who has stuck with the same kids and has seen their meltdowns and annoying habits will get what childcare really is.

Then, I look for APs that want to do something with children in the future. Not just the "I love kids!!" assertions, but someone who wants to be a teacher or some similar field after being an au pair.

If they pass those two checks, I contact them and we Skype. I eliminate anyone who doesn't have at least inteligible English - no disrespect to those who can't speak English very well, but I have a hard enough time communicating my needs when they do speak English. Our family needs someone who can speak and understand pretty well. I also eliminate anyone who seems really nervous or doesn't ask me questions or only asks questions about what they get out of the deal (do I get a car? Do I have a curfew? etc).

Honestly, but this point I've known who both of my au pairs were going to be. Both I've just known for some reason that they are the right fit, although I'm not sure how. So at this point, I make sure they understand the good and bad things about what we offer as a family and the good and bad things about being an au pair. And then, we make the match.

What's your process for selecting?

[Anonymous]

We tend to stick to one country. Then we look for age (19-21), driving skills (usually own a car, drive often), and good photos, and no boyfriend. We want someone who is fun, has nice looking friends and is independent, and who will have a good time experiencing the US when they are not watching my kids. We want them to have experience watching kids all day and who has worked full-time or part-time for several months at one job, not just babysitting at night, and ideally with some experience helping with homework. We want someone who has enough on-going experience with kids that we don't think they're coming just to party though. We haven't had to worry too much about English but we want them to be able to read to my younger one.

[Anonymous]

I look for good drivers, good english skills, and has had a real job, and a variety of childcare experiences (other than babysitting). personality has to be positive and I use the video to weed out those without creativity. I look at what they want to be in the future and their reasons for being an AP.

Ask if they are a smoker, even socially. My current AP didn't disclose she is a social smoker and it bothers me, especially when I can smell it on her clothes after a night out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We tend to stick to one country. Then we look for age (19-21), driving skills (usually own a car, drive often), and good photos, and no boyfriend. We want someone who is fun, has nice looking friends and is independent, and who will have a good time experiencing the US when they are not watching my kids. We want them to have experience watching kids all day and who has worked full-time or part-time for several months at one job, not just babysitting at night, and ideally with some experience helping with homework. We want someone who has enough on-going experience with kids that we don't think they're coming just to party though. We haven't had to worry too much about English but we want them to be able to read to my younger one.

I'm curious what country you stick to and why? We've had experience with au pairs from the France and Brazil and been pretty lucky with both. I do think that Brazilian Au Pair had an attitude that might have been a little bit more compatible with our family. But the jury's really still out on that one....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We tend to stick to one country. Then we look for age (19-21), driving skills (usually own a car, drive often), and good photos, and no boyfriend. We want someone who is fun, has nice looking friends and is independent, and who will have a good time experiencing the US when they are not watching my kids. We want them to have experience watching kids all day and who has worked full-time or part-time for several months at one job, not just babysitting at night, and ideally with some experience helping with homework. We want someone who has enough on-going experience with kids that we don't think they're coming just to party though. We haven't had to worry too much about English but we want them to be able to read to my younger one.

I'm curious what country you stick to and why? We've had experience with au pairs from the France and Brazil and been pretty lucky with both. I do think that Brazilian Au Pair had an attitude that might have been a little bit more compatible with our family. But the jury's really still out on that one....

Also, another question for the first quoted poster: why 19-21 years old? We've usually had au pairs 23-25, and I wonder why younger works for you.

[Anonymous]

Quoted PP here - I'm sure you can find good APs from most countries. We have a family-related cultural connection to one of the bigger providers, and we've had good luck, so we have been reluctant to branch out from there. We avoid 18 year olds, and there aren't many who are much over 21 from this country. I think the AP experience is different with younger versus older APs. But whatever works.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Quoted PP here - I'm sure you can find good APs from most countries. We have a family-related cultural connection to one of the bigger providers, and we've had good luck, so we have been reluctant to branch out from there. We avoid 18 year olds, and there aren't many who are much over 21 from this country. I think the AP experience is different with younger versus older APs. But whatever works.

NP here but older au pairs, esp if they have lived independently for a while, may have a harder time adjusting to living with a family again, with all the accompanying obligations (or restrictions) that may go along with that. Also, if they are under 21, you have less to worry about w/ drinking alcohol. Its simple: you drink, you go home. End of discussion.