Live-In off the table if you have an SO?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a live in nanny I'm not aloud to have guests over. I also use their car for work and personal use so I'm not aloud to go anywhere without their permission. I find this difficult to make friends. My employers are very strict though and worry about safety.

You are allowing yourself to be treated like a child, not an adult. Please get another job with more normal people so you can grow-up a bit.

[Anonymous]

As a nanny I'd have to question any man of mine that would even be up for this. What would make this even something to consider? A man should want a home of his own and no rules unless they are set by he and his wife. His income should be enough that her job wouldn't have to be do extreme. This is ridiculous unless it's a family just moving to a new area and waiting to get in their own home

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unless you plan on being completely celibate with your SO, having sex is going to be so awkward. It'll be pretty much like sneaking a guy/girl back to your room when your parents are sleeping next door, every day. So, unless there's a separate apartment I wouldn't even consider it.

Huh?

We have a live in and allow overnight guests and I can hear ANYTHING that goes on downstairs. When we built out the basement we put soundproofing between the floors, plus our home is large enough for a basement suite with separate entrance and kitchen even. I hate to break it to you, but most families with live ins are well off and have house that accommodate a significant amount of privacy for the live in. I don't want to her her and she doesn't want to hear our family whrn she is off. We make that happen.

[Anonymous]

^^and no. I wouldn't be down with SO living with us. Maybe I'd consider a married couple, as long as thearly husband is gainfully employed and I'd charge a slight amount for utilities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless you plan on being completely celibate with your SO, having sex is going to be so awkward. It'll be pretty much like sneaking a guy/girl back to your room when your parents are sleeping next door, every day. So, unless there's a separate apartment I wouldn't even consider it.

Huh?

We have a live in and allow overnight guests and I can hear ANYTHING that goes on downstairs. When we built out the basement we put soundproofing between the floors, plus our home is large enough for a basement suite with separate entrance and kitchen even. I hate to break it to you, but most families with live ins are well off and have house that accommodate a significant amount of privacy for the live in. I don't want to her her and she doesn't want to hear our family whrn she is off. We make that happen.

Why are you being so condescending? You don't need to break anything to me. I am very glad that you are able to offer your nanny such privacy and comfort. But I was a live-in three times, and only once did I have a more or less private area with a separate entrance. The other two times I was just in one of the rooms like the other people in the house, and while I was allowed overnight guests and had my free time respected, it would still had been way too awkward to have sex with someone. It was exactly like when you're still living at home, you had to be quiet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a live in nanny I'm not aloud to have guests over. I also use their car for work and personal use so I'm not aloud to go anywhere without their permission. I find this difficult to make friends. My employers are very strict though and worry about safety.

You're not allowed to go anywhere without their permission? This isn't normal, you do understand that, right?

I'm not asking this to be snarky or anything, but out of genuine concern for your well-being: Are you safe? Are you alright? Are you treated fairly and more importantly, are you being paid fairly?

You sound like you're being treated like a slave and that is NOT okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless you plan on being completely celibate with your SO, having sex is going to be so awkward. It'll be pretty much like sneaking a guy/girl back to your room when your parents are sleeping next door, every day. So, unless there's a separate apartment I wouldn't even consider it.

Huh?

We have a live in and allow overnight guests and I can hear ANYTHING that goes on downstairs. When we built out the basement we put soundproofing between the floors, plus our home is large enough for a basement suite with separate entrance and kitchen even. I hate to break it to you, but most families with live ins are well off and have house that accommodate a significant amount of privacy for the live in. I don't want to her her and she doesn't want to hear our family whrn she is off. We make that happen.

Why are you being so condescending? You don't need to break anything to me. I am very glad that you are able to offer your nanny such privacy and comfort. But I was a live-in three times, and only once did I have a more or less private area with a separate entrance. The other two times I was just in one of the rooms like the other people in the house, and while I was allowed overnight guests and had my free time respected, it would still had been way too awkward to have sex with someone. It was exactly like when you're still living at home, you had to be quiet.

She's not. It's the truth. I'm a live in as well and have NEVER had a job without separate living quarters. I cannot even wrap my head around how you would accept a job with a room in the same area as the NFL.

Mosthe people have separate entrances for the living spaces and many of them even small kitchens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a live in nanny I'm not aloud to have guests over. I also use their car for work and personal use so I'm not aloud to go anywhere without their permission. I find this difficult to make friends. My employers are very strict though and worry about safety.

You're not allowed to go anywhere without their permission? This isn't normal, you do understand that, right?

I'm not asking this to be snarky or anything, but out of genuine concern for your well-being: Are you safe? Are you alright? Are you treated fairly and more importantly, are you being paid fairly?

You sound like you're being treated like a slave and that is NOT okay.

I have to agree. Something is very wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a live in nanny I'm not aloud to have guests over. I also use their car for work and personal use so I'm not aloud to go anywhere without their permission. I find this difficult to make friends. My employers are very strict though and worry about safety.

You're not allowed to go anywhere without their permission? This isn't normal, you do understand that, right?

I'm not asking this to be snarky or anything, but out of genuine concern for your well-being: Are you safe? Are you alright? Are you treated fairly and more importantly, are you being paid fairly?

You sound like you're being treated like a slave and that is NOT okay.

I have to agree. Something is very wrong.

PP here who asked the questions. Was hoping the nanny who posted would've come back. Should the nanny poster return, please know there are resources out here to help you and I'm sure many on this board can also offer advice. If you really aren't allowed to leave without permission, you are being held captive, and nobody deserves to go through that. Please speak up on here so we can help you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a live in nanny I'm not aloud to have guests over. I also use their car for work and personal use so I'm not aloud to go anywhere without their permission. I find this difficult to make friends. My employers are very strict though and worry about safety.

You're not allowed to go anywhere without their permission? This isn't normal, you do understand that, right?

I'm not asking this to be snarky or anything, but out of genuine concern for your well-being: Are you safe? Are you alright? Are you treated fairly and more importantly, are you being paid fairly?

You sound like you're being treated like a slave and that is NOT okay.

I have to agree. Something is very wrong.

PP here who asked the questions. Was hoping the nanny who posted would've come back. Should the nanny poster return, please know there are resources out here to help you and I'm sure many on this board can also offer advice. If you really aren't allowed to leave without permission, you are being held captive, and nobody deserves to go through that. Please speak up on here so we can help you.

+1,000,000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a live in nanny I'm not aloud to have guests over. I also use their car for work and personal use so I'm not aloud to go anywhere without their permission. I find this difficult to make friends. My employers are very strict though and worry about safety.

You're not allowed to go anywhere without their permission? This isn't normal, you do understand that, right?

I'm not asking this to be snarky or anything, but out of genuine concern for your well-being: Are you safe? Are you alright? Are you treated fairly and more importantly, are you being paid fairly?

You sound like you're being treated like a slave and that is NOT okay.

I have to agree. Something is very wrong.

PP here who asked the questions. Was hoping the nanny who posted would've come back. Should the nanny poster return, please know there are resources out here to help you and I'm sure many on this board can also offer advice. If you really aren't allowed to leave without permission, you are being held captive, and nobody deserves to go through that. Please speak up on here so we can help you.

I'm fine, I'm not being held captive. I actually really enjoy my job. But yes I have to ask permission to leave with the car and tell them where I'm going, who im going to be with and when I will return. It is awful but I'm used to it now.