Anonymous wrote:I'm curious. The posters who are saying they did everything by themselves with no help at all - are any of them men?

My DH did everything himself but he was a 1st-gen student and only applied to the local university at the urging of a teacher.

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious. The posters who are saying they did everything by themselves with no help at all - are any of them men?

I'm one of them and am not a man but my DH is and he did his apps by himself as well.

I'm curious. The posters who are saying they did everything by themselves with no help at all - are any of them men?

I think Naviance is a big help that did not exist for our generation.

Well, I applied on my own to college in the fall of 1984. The process seemed rather simple. I researched a few colleges, read a book (Fiske's Guide maybe?). and came up with one reach, one target and one safety school. Back then it seemed that you could really have a sense of where you would get in. I hoped for some financial aid but that process didn't seem too onerous either.

I wrote three essays, one for each school, but they were basically the same essay. I had to handwrite for one school (Brown) but could type for the other two schools. We mailed the application in back then. I didn't do anything like early acceptance or early decision although I am aware that some students did this. I was only taking 2 AP courses at the time because our school didn't have the crazy AP arms race that seems to be going on nowadays. Even so it was a stressful fall.

The process my son had to go through last fall was SO MUCH WORSE than anything I had to do. Multiple spreadsheets, keeping track of ginormous amounts of emails. Demonstrating interest at various schools. Chasing merit aid (we are not wealthy). Early applications. Rolling admission schools. Naviance. A sense that acceptance at various schools is a total crapshoot! No one can tell who will get in and who won't.

A mess.

Anonymous wrote:Please step in to help where you can, OP. It’ll be okay, and your child will not suffer because you assisted in the process. My children are all grown. They all appreciate the help I offered when they needed it, and they’re independent, regardless of the degree of support they needed/cherished during their college years.

Don’t underestimate how much they’ll mature between 18 and 22. Hugs to you, and I hope your fledgling will leave the nest as expected!

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Earlier post references writing their child’s essay WTF?

No, that was a misunderstanding.

Yes thank you, that was me. I posted a follow-up when I realized that the way I worded it sounded like I wrote DS's essay. That I did NOT do. He wouldn't even let me look at it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:-For those who applied 20 years ago, the process has changed! When you child applies to multiple schools + keeping up their GPA in AP classes + extra curriculars, it is A LOT!

-All CC’s are not created equal. You are very fortunate in DCUM land that a certain GPA guarantees acceptance to UVA, UMD etc. Do you realize that does not happen in other states?
Additionally, not all credits are accepted.

+1. When I applied to UMD 30+ years ago, it was insanely easy and as a MD resident with a B average and 1000 on your SATs, you were pretty much guaranteed admittance. I hadn’t taken an AP class in my life and had zero extracurriculars. And tuition was only $2400 a year.

Stakes are MUCH higher now.

,

Pp here from 20 years ago whose parents were not involved. I applied to at least 10 universities including Ivys, Georgetown, Berkeley, etc. before wide usage of common app and electronic apps, as another poster of same vintage mentioned. I'm not talking about UMD or other less competitive state schools. Same pressures with GPA, SATs, ECs, etc. Repeated same process four years later for grad school and it was like muscle memory at that point.

Those of us "old millennials"/Gen-X-Millenial "cuspers" mostly don't have HS-age kids yet, so I guess we shall see!

Hopefully, your kids won't have to deal with what this batch of seniors have dealt with, including not knowing whether you would have SAT or ACT scores, which makes making a list difficult, preparing for and having the test cancelled multiple times, losing a huge chunk of your junior year, etc. I know that I grew up quite a bit working the summer before my senior year, but we didn't feel comfortable having our kid work this summer. This time is always stressful, but this year particularly so.

True. This year’s seniors (and this year’s college freshmen) have had to deal with uncertainty and challenges unlike any other in recent history.

Anonymous wrote:Earlier post references writing their child’s essay WTF?

No, that was a misunderstanding.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:-For those who applied 20 years ago, the process has changed! When you child applies to multiple schools + keeping up their GPA in AP classes + extra curriculars, it is A LOT!

-All CC’s are not created equal. You are very fortunate in DCUM land that a certain GPA guarantees acceptance to UVA, UMD etc. Do you realize that does not happen in other states?
Additionally, not all credits are accepted.

+1. When I applied to UMD 30+ years ago, it was insanely easy and as a MD resident with a B average and 1000 on your SATs, you were pretty much guaranteed admittance. I hadn’t taken an AP class in my life and had zero extracurriculars. And tuition was only $2400 a year.

Stakes are MUCH higher now.

,

Pp here from 20 years ago whose parents were not involved. I applied to at least 10 universities including Ivys, Georgetown, Berkeley, etc. before wide usage of common app and electronic apps, as another poster of same vintage mentioned. I'm not talking about UMD or other less competitive state schools. Same pressures with GPA, SATs, ECs, etc. Repeated same process four years later for grad school and it was like muscle memory at that point.

Those of us "old millennials"/Gen-X-Millenial "cuspers" mostly don't have HS-age kids yet, so I guess we shall see!

Hopefully, your kids won't have to deal with what this batch of seniors have dealt with, including not knowing whether you would have SAT or ACT scores, which makes making a list difficult, preparing for and having the test cancelled multiple times, losing a huge chunk of your junior year, etc. I know that I grew up quite a bit working the summer before my senior year, but we didn't feel comfortable having our kid work this summer. This time is always stressful, but this year particularly so.

Earlier post references writing their child’s essay WTF?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:-For those who applied 20 years ago, the process has changed! When you child applies to multiple schools + keeping up their GPA in AP classes + extra curriculars, it is A LOT!

-All CC’s are not created equal. You are very fortunate in DCUM land that a certain GPA guarantees acceptance to UVA, UMD etc. Do you realize that does not happen in other states?
Additionally, not all credits are accepted.

+1. When I applied to UMD 30+ years ago, it was insanely easy and as a MD resident with a B average and 1000 on your SATs, you were pretty much guaranteed admittance. I hadn’t taken an AP class in my life and had zero extracurriculars. And tuition was only $2400 a year.

Stakes are MUCH higher now.

,

Pp here from 20 years ago whose parents were not involved. I applied to at least 10 universities including Ivys, Georgetown, Berkeley, etc. before wide usage of common app and electronic apps, as another poster of same vintage mentioned. I'm not talking about UMD or other less competitive state schools. Same pressures with GPA, SATs, ECs, etc. Repeated same process four years later for grad school and it was like muscle memory at that point.

Those of us "old millennials"/Gen-X-Millenial "cuspers" mostly don't have HS-age kids yet, so I guess we shall see!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:-For those who applied 20 years ago, the process has changed! When you child applies to multiple schools + keeping up their GPA in AP classes + extra curriculars, it is A LOT!

-All CC’s are not created equal. You are very fortunate in DCUM land that a certain GPA guarantees acceptance to UVA, UMD etc. Do you realize that does not happen in other states?
Additionally, not all credits are accepted.

I mean, I applied to college in 1999. I was taking multiple AP classes, had time-consuming extracurricular activities (including marching band and a part-time job at the mall), AND had to fill out an individual application for each college -- no common app back then. Individual essays specific to each school. Applications typed on a typewriter in the space provided. It was also the nascent days of widespread internet, so I actually had to go to the bookstore or library to read Princeton Review-style guides and request brochures from schools I was interested in way ahead of time through snail mail.

I got accepted into an Ivy, Stanford, and the small liberal arts college I ultimately attended. My classmates were super intelligent, self-sufficient, and self-motivated. I cannot even imagine how someone whose mommy had to orchestrate the application process would even fare in a top-tier school.

Correction, I applied to college in fall of 1998, graduated from high school in 1999.

I guess you didn't have any time with your busy schedule to develop empathy or humility.

Simply countering the assertion that parents must be involved in every step of the process now because applying to college today is so much harder than it was 20 years ago, when students were expected to handle it themselves.

I have older kids and a current senior. I can also tell you that my older kids got quite a bit of direction and information about college applications during the spring semester, even in a huge public school with few counselors. They started their essays and were given information about planning for the process, requesting recommendations, and creating their resume. Let's just say that they didn't even get any instruction in their AP course last spring, so preparing for college applications was definitely not a priority.

My son's current high school did not send anything out about the application process until the very end of August, which I think is unconscionable. The deadlines for requesting recommendations for Early Decision/Early Action deadlines was October 1, which didn't give them much time. In fact, even the school start date was delayed for two weeks. Sure, some kids are on top of this, but for those who aren't, the schools let kids down this year.

And by the way, not every kid is Ivy bound. And that's ok.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:-For those who applied 20 years ago, the process has changed! When you child applies to multiple schools + keeping up their GPA in AP classes + extra curriculars, it is A LOT!

-All CC’s are not created equal. You are very fortunate in DCUM land that a certain GPA guarantees acceptance to UVA, UMD etc. Do you realize that does not happen in other states?
Additionally, not all credits are accepted.

I mean, I applied to college in 1999. I was taking multiple AP classes, had time-consuming extracurricular activities (including marching band and a part-time job at the mall), AND had to fill out an individual application for each college -- no common app back then. Individual essays specific to each school. Applications typed on a typewriter in the space provided. It was also the nascent days of widespread internet, so I actually had to go to the bookstore or library to read Princeton Review-style guides and request brochures from schools I was interested in way ahead of time through snail mail.

I got accepted into an Ivy, Stanford, and the small liberal arts college I ultimately attended. My classmates were super intelligent, self-sufficient, and self-motivated. I cannot even imagine how someone whose mommy had to orchestrate the application process would even fare in a top-tier school.

Correction, I applied to college in fall of 1998, graduated from high school in 1999.

I guess you didn't have any time with your busy schedule to develop empathy or humility.

Simply countering the assertion that parents must be involved in every step of the process now because applying to college today is so much harder than it was 20 years ago, when students were expected to handle it themselves.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:-For those who applied 20 years ago, the process has changed! When you child applies to multiple schools + keeping up their GPA in AP classes + extra curriculars, it is A LOT!

-All CC’s are not created equal. You are very fortunate in DCUM land that a certain GPA guarantees acceptance to UVA, UMD etc. Do you realize that does not happen in other states?
Additionally, not all credits are accepted.

I mean, I applied to college in 1999. I was taking multiple AP classes, had time-consuming extracurricular activities (including marching band and a part-time job at the mall), AND had to fill out an individual application for each college -- no common app back then. Individual essays specific to each school. Applications typed on a typewriter in the space provided. It was also the nascent days of widespread internet, so I actually had to go to the bookstore or library to read Princeton Review-style guides and request brochures from schools I was interested in way ahead of time through snail mail.

I got accepted into an Ivy, Stanford, and the small liberal arts college I ultimately attended. My classmates were super intelligent, self-sufficient, and self-motivated. I cannot even imagine how someone whose mommy had to orchestrate the application process would even fare in a top-tier school.

Correction, I applied to college in fall of 1998, graduated from high school in 1999.

I guess you didn't have any time with your busy schedule to develop empathy or humility.