One couple I know is very New Agey and she’s a couples therapist. She’s kind of a bitch in real life so I’m not sure how he can stand her. But they do seem happy and in love in real life too so who knows.

Total red flag that one or both is depressed. I know one particular couple that does this and I presume both have major mental health issues.

It can be OK sometimes if it's a second marriage, I suppose?

For those that do post anniversary tributes, I just wish it would be something more original...don't bother if you plan to say "20 years ago I married my best friend. I wouldn't want to do life with anyone else"

Anonymous wrote:Not as weird as the couples who have one account.

ShaneandAmanda Harris.

x1000 & one email address for the couple wtf

I think it’s mostly to hide something. So many people use social media to portray themselves as something they’re not, and it’s not just relationships either. Get offline ppl and live your real lives.

Anonymous wrote:I see it as a big red flag. I think that if you have a great relationship, there's a tendency to keep it quiet because you don't want to make other people feel bad about what you have.

Kind of like having real money - most people with true wealth aren't out there in flashy clothes and accessories trying to look like they have money and telling everyone who will listen about the expensive things they've bought.

True. The one with the very bad marriage always posting love things back and forth to her husband is also completely broke and posts extravagant vacations and dinners that they can barely afford on their 10 maxed out credit cards. They use their tax refund and have zero life or college savings. She confides when drunk.

I don't know why people feel the need to portray a very fake image.

I see it as a big red flag. I think that if you have a great relationship, there's a tendency to keep it quiet because you don't want to make other people feel bad about what you have.

Kind of like having real money - most people with true wealth aren't out there in flashy clothes and accessories trying to look like they have money and telling everyone who will listen about the expensive things they've bought.

My BIL does this with my sister. I'm pretty sure he does it when she catches doing something he shouldn't. They're basically roommates in reality but on FB they're the cutest, most loving couple ever.

The only two people I know who do this are one couple who divorced and another that had a wedding vow renewal because he cheated. So anecdotal but I always assume its because of infidelity or some huge marital issue and they are trying to show a united front to the world. Mind you, I am mid 40s and it's pretty rare to see people our age do this.

Our parents, grandparents and so on never needed to indulge in this sort of stuff-- maybe a big 50th anniversary party at the Knights of Columbus was about it-- and they all stayed married for decades.

Anonymous wrote:So all the genuinely decent, nice people who aren’t putting on a facade but actually just being themselves and firing on their spouses because they don’t see social media as a marketing campaign to win the likes and approval of others but who just use it as a means of fun communication and creative expression all those folks are just fcuked and out of luck if they mistakenly get deemed by all of you as being overcompensating irritants when they’re really not.
Smh
Damn shame but luckily they don’t give a shit if you approve of their affections or not.
Fcuk y’all too.

doting not firing.

So all the genuinely decent, nice people who aren’t putting on a facade but actually just being themselves and firing on their spouses because they don’t see social media as a marketing campaign to win the likes and approval of others but who just use it as a means of fun communication and creative expression all those folks are just fcuked and out of luck if they mistakenly get deemed by all of you as being overcompensating irritants when they’re really not.
Smh
Damn shame but luckily they don’t give a shit if you approve of their affections or not.
Fcuk y’all too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sincere question: why does anyone care how another person expresses their feelings? If you're happy with the way you express your feelings toward your spouse that's great. Why would it matter to you how another person chooses to express their feelings? It has no impact on you unless you let it. Why look at it? Why spend time on it? Let them do whatever it is you think is wrong/stupid/silly and just concentrate on your own behavior.

It rubs people the wrong way when others put on fake or grandiose public displays in a bid for attention and accolades.

My question stands. If it rubs you the wrong way why look at it/spend time on it? Wouldn't you rather avoid it?

Different poster- it rubs me the wrong way too, and while I don’t go out of my way to look for posts like that, when they’re on my newsfeed I do pause and think about why people post such over the top displays of affection, and why it makes me uncomfortable. I too feel like it’s more appropriate sentiment for a private card. Simple “happy anniversary!” would suffice for social media IMO. I think different people do it for different reasons. Some are happy and think their spouse might appreciate it, some are just influencers or other bored people trying to humblebrag about their life, and some people are probably compensating.

Anonymous wrote:A really good friend of mine posts a FB thank you to her husband when he buys her extravagant things like expensive jewelry or hand bags. It’s awkward.

To you but it’s not for you is it?

A really good friend of mine posts a FB thank you to her husband when he buys her extravagant things like expensive jewelry or hand bags. It’s awkward.

It does seem a bit much. I think a picture of the couple saying happy anniversary or birthday is fine. The long messages I think are for show as likely the other spouse is not even on FB. I agree with “ just tell the spouse” in person.

My DC think FB is for “ old” people but I have told them many times ( in other contexts) that their thoughts, feelings, special moments belong to them and not to the world. Choose what to share. Cherish their feelings, thoughts, accomplishments, disappointments for themselves.