Anonymous
Post 10/15/2020 22:42     Subject: DD Came Out
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:FTM or MTF? I know there are some who don’t want to hear it, but this is a trending thing among teenagers. For girls, it’s replaced the cutting and anorexia of past decades as a way of dealing with the pain and anxiety of puberty. I would do what you can to avoid any permanent changes or medical/surgical treatments.


Reviving this thread because I am having this exact issue right now with my almost 14 year old. I'm not going to go as far as came out as transgender because that happened much later in the conversation. She wants to get a chest binder with the reason being she is uncomfortable with her body. I am not surprised the subject has come up. As others have noted, this seems to be a huge topic for this age group. It's certainly not the first time we've heard her mention LGBTQ issues/topics.

I offered support - not for a chest binder, but in general. I told her I'd compromise and get her sports bras, but that I thought the chest binder is a step forward on a path that I'm not convinced we've fully explored whether she should be on. She has a therapist - she tends towards anxiety, and IMO, depression. I admitted that I don't have direct experience with this and we could talk to her therapist and pediatrician.

Look, in the end if she is actually transgender, non-binary, gay, or straight we will support her.

But I don't see this as a fully formed decision and this particular request strikes me as along the lines of exactly what the PP said - " For girls, it’s replaced the cutting and anorexia of past decades as a way of dealing with the pain and anxiety of puberty." That is what I heard in what she said.

Looking for resources to deal with this even-handedly and objectively so that she feels heard but also so we are dealing with her real issues. Thanks.


Watch Elle Palmer on YouTube. She transitioned to male as a young teenager and has detransitioned back to female as a 19 or 20 year old? I think she’s 20 or 21 now and she is very open and honest about her experiences. I really kind of admire her for being so brave talking about it on YouTube.
Anonymous
Post 10/15/2020 20:13     Subject: Re:DD Came Out
ROGD is real. Read about the U.K. read about statistics in the us. Go to a middle school or high school. With close to 90% of all teens identifying as trends being FTM, and so many hundreds Of detransitionerS, it is obvious. No reason to argue on this. It doesn’t mean parents don’t accept their kids. It’s not anti-trans it’s just captain obvious this is happening and if you aren’t a little concerned you’re probably not researching well.
Anonymous
Post 10/09/2020 13:18     Subject: DD Came Out
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I have a tween girl right now and she came out trans I would accept the child, love the child and support the child any which way can and I be happy I have a son.

But, how anyone can say there is no medical/mental condition present when a person's brain does not match the body is beyond me and totally defies any sense of logic. Biology is biology to me and having a mental/medical condition is no judgment about the person. Alas, I will be called transphobic, ignorant, a bully, bad parent, and bigot.



Where exactly did you get your degree in psychology again?


I don't need a psychology degree to use basic logic. I dare to say that many in the medical community think that psychology isn't science at all. These are all excuses to make people feel like rejecting your gender is normal. Come on, we all know "scientific" conclusions can be determined to reach a certain outcome. Happens everyday...


I dare say that a large portion of my patients are MDs, their spouses, and children.

Stop proclaiming things that you know nothing about or at least state: it is my opinion that...

And no, contrary to your belief, scientific conclusions are not just made willy-nilly to fit a scientist's narrative. Do you have any idea how many hours of research and testing goes into proving or disproving a hypothesis?


NP - The only scientifically performed studies that I have seen re: this topic are that trans people are more likely to have mental illness and substance abuse diagnoses both before and after hormone treatments and surgeries.
Anonymous
Post 10/07/2020 08:11     Subject: DD Came Out
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Invite your husband to think about whether or not he would like his daughter to kill herself or leave your house and never EVER have anything to do with him ever again. Because that's what he's putting in motion by storming out.

Now, maybe he needed a while to wrap his head around this, but he just rejected his child in a huge way.


I'm reminded of back in the day when my teen cousin declared she was bisexual and had kissed a girl, and my aunt said "how nice" and not another word, and the cousin is now happily married with children.

That's teenagers for you.


She may still be bisexual.


Right. I am bisexual. I married a man. Hence being bisexual and not a lesbian.
Anonymous
Post 10/06/2020 23:15     Subject: DD Came Out
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Invite your husband to think about whether or not he would like his daughter to kill herself or leave your house and never EVER have anything to do with him ever again. Because that's what he's putting in motion by storming out.

Now, maybe he needed a while to wrap his head around this, but he just rejected his child in a huge way.


I'm reminded of back in the day when my teen cousin declared she was bisexual and had kissed a girl, and my aunt said "how nice" and not another word, and the cousin is now happily married with children.

That's teenagers for you.


She may still be bisexual.

The point is it made no difference in her life. That was the correct response. No big deal if she is old enough to be kissing someone.
Anonymous
Post 10/06/2020 23:14     Subject: DD Came Out
The more of a big deal you make of it the more she will feel she had to prove it to you. It is how she really feels then it will take a natural course. There are trans children I know who made that announcement and it made sense and that’s that. There is another girl I know who was trans for a year or so but then decided she was really a girl after all. Think how damaging her relationship with her parents would be if they had made a big deal. Let it flow. Stay clam. Family therapy, separately.
Anonymous
Post 10/06/2020 16:41     Subject: DD Came Out
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Invite your husband to think about whether or not he would like his daughter to kill herself or leave your house and never EVER have anything to do with him ever again. Because that's what he's putting in motion by storming out.

Now, maybe he needed a while to wrap his head around this, but he just rejected his child in a huge way.


I'm reminded of back in the day when my teen cousin declared she was bisexual and had kissed a girl, and my aunt said "how nice" and not another word, and the cousin is now happily married with children.

That's teenagers for you.


She may still be bisexual.
Anonymous
Post 10/06/2020 16:36     Subject: DD Came Out
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:The only time I hear "woke" is when uttered by some conservative trying to make a (usually, but not always, bigoted) statement or observation.



I'm about as liberal as it gets. And no one, and I mean no one, outside of the above-mentioned group, uses that word. So, just stop. You sound dumb.


+1
Woke was used by young people around the same time people were saying "Bye Felicia"... so those using it now are crusty and the same people who lament being "PC" which really means, I can't get away with saying vile shit without being called out on it now, and waaaaah no fair. I dare call them Karens but now the thick irony is that the actual Karens are the woefully behind ones who use the term Karen now


+ 100. Spot on.
Anonymous
Post 10/06/2020 12:20     Subject: DD Came Out
PP at the bottom of page six needs to start a new thread. People are getting too caught up in the ancient OP to read to the end before posting. It’s also clearly a very different situation.
Anonymous
Post 10/06/2020 12:09     Subject: Re:DD Came Out
*Your...I hate not being able to edit.
Anonymous
Post 10/06/2020 12:09     Subject: DD Came Out
Anonymous wrote:I would explain to your DD that you didn't anticipate it and you will love her regardless but that it will take time for you as parents to process this - you are all going through a transition. Our child changed their sexual preferences twice between ages 15 and 19 and we anticipate that they may change again. As parents, we try to just act and parent the same toward our child and not overly react to anything. We don't announce to others our child's changes because we aren't sure how things will end up.


You're child is looking for attention. Identifying as another gender is a very real and emotional decision and for those that truly are transgender there is no going back and forth. Childs that go back and forth and back and forth are attention seeking.
Anonymous
Post 10/06/2020 11:17     Subject: DD Came Out
Anonymous wrote:The only time I hear "woke" is when uttered by some conservative trying to make a (usually, but not always, bigoted) statement or observation.



I'm about as liberal as it gets. And no one, and I mean no one, outside of the above-mentioned group, uses that word. So, just stop. You sound dumb.


+1
Woke was used by young people around the same time people were saying "Bye Felicia"... so those using it now are crusty and the same people who lament being "PC" which really means, I can't get away with saying vile shit without being called out on it now, and waaaaah no fair. I dare call them Karens but now the thick irony is that the actual Karens are the woefully behind ones who use the term Karen now
Anonymous
Post 10/06/2020 10:26     Subject: DD Came Out
The only time I hear "woke" is when uttered by some conservative trying to make a (usually, but not always, bigoted) statement or observation.

I'm about as liberal as it gets. And no one, and I mean no one, outside of the above-mentioned group, uses that word. So, just stop. You sound dumb.
Anonymous
Post 10/06/2020 00:34     Subject: DD Came Out
Anonymous wrote:I would love to see the research that transgenderism is not a psychiatric condition. Are there any links to share with peer reviewed research?


Why don't you hop on over to Google and search for yourself, rather than sitting here expecting to be spoon fed? We'll all be waiting for your findings!
Anonymous
Post 10/05/2020 13:57     Subject: Re:DD Came Out
I think this is an obvious troll because anyone who has been on this board for 2 minutes knows what exactly will transpire on any "my kid is Q and just told us" thread and also knows this is a shit place for information or support for that. But yall bit.