Anonymous wrote:OP why did you marry this guy in the first place? Did you get knocked up before marriage? What was so wrong about him using marital funds to pay off student loan debt, doesn’t that help both of you since the debt burden would be eliminated?

OP maybe it’s just the way you write, but you sound a bit selfish and like you only look out for yourself. Has it always been like this, or is there something we’re missing to this story?

From another country?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH came home today and told me we need to change our relationship. He said he is tired of bearing one hundred percent of the financial burden for our family, tired of the stress that it is putting on him. He said one of three things are going to happen:

1. I am going to step up to the plate and start paying my "fair share" share of the household bills, i.e. mortgage, utilities, etc.
2. I am going to quit my job and follow him on a new overseas assignment, and either we sell or rent out the house because it is too much a burden for him alone.
3. We get divorced, and he gets his equitable distribution from our "joint assets," whatever that means. I have my own savings and have made successful investments. He doesn't have much saved. That's his problem I guess.

He said one of three things are going to happen:

Adding a fourth...

4. You are going to shake your rump like it's midnight at the Oasis.

Has #4 come true yet?

OP why did you marry this guy in the first place? Did you get knocked up before marriage? What was so wrong about him using marital funds to pay off student loan debt, doesn’t that help both of you since the debt burden would be eliminated?

OP maybe it’s just the way you write, but you sound a bit selfish and like you only look out for yourself. Has it always been like this, or is there something we’re missing to this story?

Did your DH call the IRS help line for tax advice on how to file taxes for the rental properties? That's not actually reporting you to the IRS, that's just asking guidance.

Do you own the properties outright or are the mortgaged?

your DH can move out and file for divorce, you then need to pay the mortgage on your current home and I guess on your other properties since you say they are yours. Plus your living expenses.

child support will not cover all your living costs and is not meant to.

you will need to pay for an attorney.

you will split custody. You will not get sole custody. OTOH if you go to court and act and speak as unreasonably as you do in writing here, I could see your DH mounting a case for possible parental alienation and asking for custody.

Counselors are supposed to be direct and state the problem not hint around the problem and everyone is just supposed to know what is going on. If you can't deal with directness in counseling, you will have trouble during the divorce proceedings bc your DH and his lawyer will be very direct and if you aren't that won't benefit you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've clearly been reading this site to long. There are from time to time nearly identical posts about a man living overseas and his wife is a lawyer (maybe biglaw) and they have this exact arrangement where he is allegedly paying the expenses from his paycheck and she saves all of her paycheck or uses it to buy things for herself. I believe he also claims that she does not let the child visit him at his overseas post.

Are you saying OP is a troll, since the same posts never get resolved? Or that it’s an actual person?

If OP is a real person, they should go to financial counseling or a financial planner. OP and DH need a plan together, with all assets.

She's not going to like hearing that her rental property income is taxable and she owes the IRS quite a bit of back taxes!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've clearly been reading this site to long. There are from time to time nearly identical posts about a man living overseas and his wife is a lawyer (maybe biglaw) and they have this exact arrangement where he is allegedly paying the expenses from his paycheck and she saves all of her paycheck or uses it to buy things for herself. I believe he also claims that she does not let the child visit him at his overseas post.

Are you saying OP is a troll, since the same posts never get resolved? Or that it’s an actual person?

If OP is a real person, they should go to financial counseling or a financial planner. OP and DH need a plan together, with all assets.