Um, OP, you were there with your daughter.

Odds are she is going to tell someone that you ran into him at the ice cream shop.

Anonymous wrote:20 years younger, attractive, and slim--of course he's having an affair with her. With this kid's other relatives here. And you watching instead of engaging with him. Crystal clear to me

Lol.

Or she is thinking to herself "Creepy old guy is back again. Gotta flirt with him to get some tips so I can go have fun with all the other teens tonight."

Anonymous wrote:Perhaps you should just describe what you witnessed to your sister and let them hash it out?

If BIL is cheating he’s not going to admit it to you. He’s going to at the very least discount/make excuses for what you saw and honestly what adult man leaves his kids home alone while he visits an ice cream shop?

What adult man sees family at a public place and blows them off but is super friendly to the young female employee and her son/nephew?

No adult man would approach a child in public and sit with the child without being familiar with the child.

Sorry op. You know what you saw.

+1

OP, for all you know, they have problems, and this would help her case.

OP, I think your gut instinct is correct. Can you discreetly trail him a couple of days? I would also think it's fine to just ask him how he knew the boy and then let him talk You'll know right away if the question made him uncomfortable.

You and he have known each other a long time. That is really odd behavior for that long/close of a relationship.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. Zero benefit of the doubt here. Pretty disgusting.

+ 1

White people!

You're crazy, black people!

Anonymous wrote:It sounds a little weird.

Why would he choose to sit somewhere else and play with another kid and not his own niece and just talk to his SIL until they left.

Sounds odd to me. Maybe he just has a crush on ice cream girl and you ruined the few minutes of fantasy but whatever it is...it wasn't completely innocent.

Perhaps because his SIL is an ass, and he doesn't enjoy spending time with her?

It's a thought.

Anonymous wrote:Wow. Zero benefit of the doubt here. Pretty disgusting.

+ 1

White people!

Wow. Zero benefit of the doubt here. Pretty disgusting.

Perhaps you should just describe what you witnessed to your sister and let them hash it out?

If BIL is cheating he’s not going to admit it to you. He’s going to at the very least discount/make excuses for what you saw and honestly what adult man leaves his kids home alone while he visits an ice cream shop?

What adult man sees family at a public place and blows them off but is super friendly to the young female employee and her son/nephew?

No adult man would approach a child in public and sit with the child without being familiar with the child.

Sorry op. You know what you saw.

Why not just ask him what’s up? You’re well within your right to do so.

You should just ask sis if she gave DH a hall pass. That would explain everything. He's good.

Anonymous wrote:I've read every response and not one person has mentioned that he didn't order anything?!?!

I can't imagine an adult going to an ice cream/coffee shop and not order something if he was there alone.

+1

I've read every response and not one person has mentioned that he didn't order anything?!?!

I can't imagine an adult going to an ice cream/coffee shop and not order something if he was there alone.

Maybe the people at the ice cream shop have been told by the BIL it is marriage in name only. Maybe there is a reason she gets upset because she thinks something is going on. Your 'spidey radar' is telling you something.

Hi this is OP. My description of him “barreling through the back entrance” was relevant because it was odd that he was so enthusiastic. I thought it was because he saw us and was coming to make conversation. He always teases and jokes with my daughter (he is her favorite uncle). So it seemed really strange when gave us a very brief hello and then went and sat with the random boy.

I honestly am not trying to stir the pot. If I told my sister this exact story she would fly off the handle, threaten to divorce my BIL and just act crazy. But she is my sister and if he’s texting or communicating with the ice cream girl to the point he knew to come down there and hang out with her and her family and also acted “caught” then I feel like my sister should know something. I feel like if I ask him then he’ll just make something up. He knows his wife and that this could set her off.

And FYI, this is our local ice cream/coffee shop in a small planned neighborhood. We have all actually run into each other before during the summers over the past several years and BIL acted totally normal. My sister also takes their kids there and they have frequently gone there as a family too. So the people who work at the shop know he’s married with children. And I am sure this ice cream girl must know this as well.