Anonymous
Post 07/12/2018 13:48     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Anonymous wrote:Don’t use the diarrhea excuse as PP suggests.

This would -pardon the pun-backfire on me w my MIL. She loves nothing more than to ask probing personal health related questions to close family members, bonus points if it’s something intensely private, like conception or birth-related.
U
So if I told MIL I had diarrhea, she’d launch into a rapid fire line of questions; was it something I ate, did I need to use her bathroom right now, do I want x New Age essential oil, vitamin, OTC med, what have I eaten in the last 72 hours, I’m probably dehydrated/too thin/too fat/when was my last doctor visit, could I have celiac, cancer, the stomach flu...


That's kind of hilarious.
Anonymous
Post 07/12/2018 13:44     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Anonymous wrote:Don’t use the diarrhea excuse as PP suggests.

This would -pardon the pun-backfire on me w my MIL. She loves nothing more than to ask probing personal health related questions to close family members, bonus points if it’s something intensely private, like conception or birth-related.
U
So if I told MIL I had diarrhea, she’d launch into a rapid fire line of questions; was it something I ate, did I need to use her bathroom right now, do I want x New Age essential oil, vitamin, OTC med, what have I eaten in the last 72 hours, I’m probably dehydrated/too thin/too fat/when was my last doctor visit, could I have celiac, cancer, the stomach flu...


This is my MIL about everything. We can't say something as simple as we went to baseball last night with having her go full inquisition on us. Who went with us, where did we sit, did we have fun, who played, what did we eat, was it easy to get to the game, we're there any giveaways, blah blah blah. Because apparently saying "I bet that was nice" is just too difficult.
Anonymous
Post 07/12/2018 13:09     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
I would stop going. They sound incredibly annoying.
Anonymous
Post 07/12/2018 12:52     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Anonymous wrote:In front of your inlaws, husband and kids, I would talk with your children. "Hey kids, here is a classic example of what peer pressure looks like. Despite my repeated attempts to convey I do not wish to go in the pool, my wishes are ignored while I am repeatedly hassled to conform to what everyone else wants. It is like my own decision does not matter. I am being made to feel bad for the decision I have made. I am not being respected enough to know what I wish to do with my own body. I am not being treated like a capable adult. I don't like the way the cool water and chlorine makes me feel. I do not enjoy it. I would like everyone to respect that, and stop trying to convince me otherwise. I am not going in the pool today. Should I ever change my mind another day, I know how to put on a bathing suit and how to jump in."


This is stupid.
Anonymous
Post 07/12/2018 12:23     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Don’t use the diarrhea excuse as PP suggests.

This would -pardon the pun-backfire on me w my MIL. She loves nothing more than to ask probing personal health related questions to close family members, bonus points if it’s something intensely private, like conception or birth-related.
U
So if I told MIL I had diarrhea, she’d launch into a rapid fire line of questions; was it something I ate, did I need to use her bathroom right now, do I want x New Age essential oil, vitamin, OTC med, what have I eaten in the last 72 hours, I’m probably dehydrated/too thin/too fat/when was my last doctor visit, could I have celiac, cancer, the stomach flu...
Anonymous
Post 07/12/2018 12:04     Subject: Re:I don’t want to swim, thanks!
has the OP ever come back on this thread?
Anonymous
Post 07/12/2018 10:50     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Before the next pool outing tell your DH "Honey, I've been trying to be discrete but I'm having a lot of unexpected spotting and bleeding in between my periods. The doctor says I'm fine, but there is just no way to predict it. I'd really rather not put on a bathing suit at your parents' pool."

He is being a weird baby man, so he deserves the lie.


Haha, love this. Why not use such an inconvenient often painful process to work for us, for a change! Excellent idea.


My DH would give me a weird look and ask if I’d forgotten about the existence of tampons. Making up weird lies instead of just sticking to no is ridiculous.


You miss the point, which is to shock people, who incessantly pressure others to do their will, into silence.


Why would this shock someone, specifically your DH? My DH knows when I have my period and would certainly know if I were having a medical issue. Are you 12?


NP, but a tampon alone isn't gonna cut it for the first two days of my period.


Yes, and even if your DH knows you have your period, the ILs probably don't, which makes it all the more inappropriate that they'd pressure you to get into the pool. I guarantee that if OP told her ILs in graphic terms they wouldn't ask her again.


One thing that I do when stuff like this happens is drop the word "diarrhea" which shuts things down really quickly. So yeah graphic works, but you have to be ballsy enough to do it. I don't think that that won't work every time if you're there a lot, but maybe if you try it once they'll stop overall. People really get horrified when you drop the d word...

Anonymous
Post 07/11/2018 14:58     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Before the next pool outing tell your DH "Honey, I've been trying to be discrete but I'm having a lot of unexpected spotting and bleeding in between my periods. The doctor says I'm fine, but there is just no way to predict it. I'd really rather not put on a bathing suit at your parents' pool."

He is being a weird baby man, so he deserves the lie.


Haha, love this. Why not use such an inconvenient often painful process to work for us, for a change! Excellent idea.


My DH would give me a weird look and ask if I’d forgotten about the existence of tampons. Making up weird lies instead of just sticking to no is ridiculous.


You miss the point, which is to shock people, who incessantly pressure others to do their will, into silence.


Why would this shock someone, specifically your DH? My DH knows when I have my period and would certainly know if I were having a medical issue. Are you 12?


NP, but a tampon alone isn't gonna cut it for the first two days of my period.


Yes, and even if your DH knows you have your period, the ILs probably don't, which makes it all the more inappropriate that they'd pressure you to get into the pool. I guarantee that if OP told her ILs in graphic terms they wouldn't ask her again.
Anonymous
Post 07/11/2018 14:54     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Before the next pool outing tell your DH "Honey, I've been trying to be discrete but I'm having a lot of unexpected spotting and bleeding in between my periods. The doctor says I'm fine, but there is just no way to predict it. I'd really rather not put on a bathing suit at your parents' pool."

He is being a weird baby man, so he deserves the lie.


Haha, love this. Why not use such an inconvenient often painful process to work for us, for a change! Excellent idea.


My DH would give me a weird look and ask if I’d forgotten about the existence of tampons. Making up weird lies instead of just sticking to no is ridiculous.


You miss the point, which is to shock people, who incessantly pressure others to do their will, into silence.


Why would this shock someone, specifically your DH? My DH knows when I have my period and would certainly know if I were having a medical issue. Are you 12?


Not DH, but the ILs. Don't be dense.
Anonymous
Post 07/11/2018 13:48     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Agree with the others you need to talk to your husband. Why does he want you to get in so badly? Does he want time to relax vs feeling like he's 'on duty' with the kids in the pool (are they little? etc) Have your in-laws said something to him about you seeming uncomfortable there?

The crux of the issue is somewhere in there. Is he like this if you don't swim elsewhere (vacation etc?)
Anonymous
Post 07/11/2018 13:47     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Before the next pool outing tell your DH "Honey, I've been trying to be discrete but I'm having a lot of unexpected spotting and bleeding in between my periods. The doctor says I'm fine, but there is just no way to predict it. I'd really rather not put on a bathing suit at your parents' pool."

He is being a weird baby man, so he deserves the lie.


Haha, love this. Why not use such an inconvenient often painful process to work for us, for a change! Excellent idea.


My DH would give me a weird look and ask if I’d forgotten about the existence of tampons. Making up weird lies instead of just sticking to no is ridiculous.


You miss the point, which is to shock people, who incessantly pressure others to do their will, into silence.


Why would this shock someone, specifically your DH? My DH knows when I have my period and would certainly know if I were having a medical issue. Are you 12?


NP, but a tampon alone isn't gonna cut it for the first two days of my period.
Anonymous
Post 07/11/2018 13:35     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Before the next pool outing tell your DH "Honey, I've been trying to be discrete but I'm having a lot of unexpected spotting and bleeding in between my periods. The doctor says I'm fine, but there is just no way to predict it. I'd really rather not put on a bathing suit at your parents' pool."

He is being a weird baby man, so he deserves the lie.


Haha, love this. Why not use such an inconvenient often painful process to work for us, for a change! Excellent idea.


My DH would give me a weird look and ask if I’d forgotten about the existence of tampons. Making up weird lies instead of just sticking to no is ridiculous.


You miss the point, which is to shock people, who incessantly pressure others to do their will, into silence.


Why would this shock someone, specifically your DH? My DH knows when I have my period and would certainly know if I were having a medical issue. Are you 12?
Anonymous
Post 07/11/2018 08:15     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I encourage people to swim because I love the water and find a lot of pleasure in swimming. I want people I care about to know that feeling of coolness and freedom. It's the only exercise I really like, mainly because I don't have to sweat during it! So I may say, come on in! It feels great! But after that I don't bug them about it if they refuse.


People probably find you incredibly annoying. Adults don't need you tell them to "come in, it feels great!"


Swim Recruiter Poster is not going to believe that anyone could have a different experience than she does. All those "I" statements about why she likes swimming, then the jump to the conclusion that because she likes it, everyone will (you know, if they just try it, because it's safe to assume that they've never been in a pool before).

OP, does your family expect you to come along? Maybe your ILs don't like chatting with you, and you could just stay behind: "I don't feel like swimming, so I'm going stay here and read/start dinner/take a nap."


Interesting that swim recruiter doesn't like any other exercise. Wonder how she would feel getting dragged along on a half marathon?
Anonymous
Post 07/11/2018 08:11     Subject: Re:I don’t want to swim, thanks!
Anonymous wrote:

Of course you win, it’s your picture, you are the adult. But you really think your adults sons will not wish they had more pictures of you when your gone?


Do you hear yourself?? This is a thread about an adult woman being peer-pressured into doing something she doesn't want to do by other adults and you won't shut up about how right you are that it's necessary to take pictures.

Some people are not like you and value different things in life than you do. Get over it!
Anonymous
Post 07/11/2018 07:48     Subject: I don’t want to swim, thanks!
In front of your inlaws, husband and kids, I would talk with your children. "Hey kids, here is a classic example of what peer pressure looks like. Despite my repeated attempts to convey I do not wish to go in the pool, my wishes are ignored while I am repeatedly hassled to conform to what everyone else wants. It is like my own decision does not matter. I am being made to feel bad for the decision I have made. I am not being respected enough to know what I wish to do with my own body. I am not being treated like a capable adult. I don't like the way the cool water and chlorine makes me feel. I do not enjoy it. I would like everyone to respect that, and stop trying to convince me otherwise. I am not going in the pool today. Should I ever change my mind another day, I know how to put on a bathing suit and how to jump in."